Escalating?

[ARrocket]

ok, I'm in high school, and I have a problem with escalating. Sadly, I'm a virgin

I have been quite successful in getting girls interested in me, but it has never led to anything. I have a date every now and again, but nothing spectacular. Whatever. I could change that if I wanted lol. The thing is, how do I go about getting physical with a girl? I have read articles in the DJ Bible but that would seem a little weird put into context, because being in high school, the dates are really casual, and more importantly, often with very inexperienced girls. It would seem pretty weird to start smelling her neck, etc.

Another major problem is.....where to take a girl? I live with my parents, so can't take her back to my place. Since we're in high school, they all live with their parents as well. It's cold outside, so don't suggest anything like sex in the park lol.

 

[Silverant]

You'd be surprised how "inexperienced" girls can be receptive to kino.

It's not awkward to have conversations, is it? So read conversation articles, learn about comfort, attraction, excitement, seduction.

Be confident and cool (which you are), talk about exciting stuff (.....sex, basically ), and kino (get closer to her). She'll be just as happy to escalate as you are. Once you kiss (I've found) it's easy to get more physically involved.

Good Luck,
Silverant

 

[ARrocket]

thanks, but that leaves the question of where to take her? As I said, my place is ruled out, and 99 times out of 100 hers will be too!

 

[Silverant]

uh yeah, that's a common problem.

I guess when it's that 1 out of 100 when her place is available, then do it!

other than that...hmmm....idk, house parties? friends house? car (that's cramped and sucks but private)? broom closet at school?

Also, you can make out anywhere, so getting at least somewhat physical shouldn't be a problem.

 

[Bawb14]

This may sound lame and expensive but try motel if your GUARANTEED to get a lay. Uhm other then that, sneak into her house or she into yours. its better if she sneaks into yours because theres that chance that upon discovery her dad will A. Beat you senseless, or B. Call the PoPo

 

[ARrocket]

yeah, I guess making out is a good start, right?

 

[Damian]

Making out in a nice secluded spot afterschool is always doable. I have to say, kino is the KEY to escalation. If you can transition from "comfortable talking" to "comfortable making a physical connection", you are practically already on your way to "comfortable making OUT".

The key to using kino is to make it deliberate, discreet, and immediate.
-Deliberate: You have to fully commit yourself to doing it. If you feel awkward giving a girl kino, she will feel a hundred times even MORE awkward on the recieving end. Be congruent with your kino. If you want to touch her on the shoulder, DO IT.

-Discreet: Make it casual. Make your kino somewhat subtle. Let her know that you're making contact, but don't scream out to her friends, "I'M TOUCHING HER! WE LIKE EACH OTHER!!!" Make it discreet enough that bystanders won't think much of it, but that a definite connection can be made between you and your girl. Give her a fallback explanation so that when her friends ask and gossip your kino will be socially acceptable.

-Immediate: Start within 15 seconds of the beginning of an interaction. I find that an easy place to start kino is in the upper arm. Just a light touch with the fingers of your open hand as you say hi. You can bring it up to hugs, but I find that the arm touch is a nice starter. When you START a social interaction with some kino, it sets the standard so a girl knows that you're YOU, not some kid who just awkardly touched her once.

As for good dates in high school, there should be plenty of casual things you can do after school or on the weekends. You can take a walk afterschool to the local coffee shop and hang out with a group of friends. Go see a movie. If you have a car, you can have a little bit of fun in the car after you've taken her for a nice scenic drive. There are an infinite number of ideas out there.
But always remember, WHAT you do is a lot less important than HOW you do it. Don't focus on the activity, focus on your energy and enthusiasm. You can even make going to the grocery store fun by cracking a few jokes. Just know that actually spending TIME is key to making a good connection. If you had a good date, keep hanging out with the girl.

You already know what you have to do. Just follow your guns and you will be perfectly okay.

 

[ARrocket]

yeah thanks, I know that kino is the key...as for that immediate thing, should it be as immediate with a girl you are talking to for the FIRST time?

 

[Damian]

I like to put in a little bit of kino whenever things seem relaxed. And yes, you have the right idea about kino being immediate. It just defines the rules of your interaction by saying that touching is okay.

As a counterexample, if you don't kino a girl you've known for quite a while, and suddenly go to hold her hand, it's awkward and can actually be counterproductive because you are violating the unspoken rules of your relationship.

 

[ARrocket]

I like to put in a little bit of kino whenever things seem relaxed. And yes, you have the right idea about kino being immediate. It just defines the rules of your interaction by saying that touching is okay.

As a counterexample, if you don't kino a girl you've known for quite a while, and suddenly go to hold her hand, it's awkward and can actually be counterproductive because you are violating the unspoken rules of your relationship.

Yeah that makes perfect sense. Thanks

 

[AnitaBum]

Dude, you gota do this. Absolute must. Learn to bridge things from one to the next and learn the human mating sequence.
Get David Deangelos Bridges ebook. If u can't buy it, then d/l it.
Human mating sequence is like a dance, all females know it and sadly, hardly any male knows it. When you're out with a woman that likes you, she wants you to lead the dance and see whether you know it. Sometimes they will even help you out.
Basically from the top of my head the human mating dance goes like this:
1. Eye contact
2. Verbal contact, side by side
3. Verbal contact, face to face
4. Hand to hand contact
5. Arm around shoulder contact
6. Arm around waist contact
7. Mouth to mouth contact
8. Hand to genital contact
9. Sometimes mouth to breast contact
10. Mouth to genital contact
11. and finally, sex
This can be done in a day to a month, however long it takes you.
Hope this helps