Embarrassment: A different approach to killing shyness

[Starman]

There is a psychological system of reducing phobia's and unwanted behavior call Systematic Desensitization
where you gradually expose yourself to your fear..and slowly..work up the the read deal

(i.e. if you are afraid of snakes..you are shown a picture of a snake..then a rubber snake..then taken to a zoo to see snakes..then at the end finally handling a snake)

Then there is a similar theory that says to JUST THROW that person in their phobia..and let them lose the fear that way

This past weekend..I dressed up as a Fatman..and went walking around public places

I felt stupid at first.embarrassed , humiliated ..but after a while..the fear went away

If you are shy or have a fear of meeting people..try this technique..and talk to a bunch of people (most people came up to me! and I even scored a HB's fone #)

see link below for the story

http://webpages.charter.net/dromenesko/web/fatman/fatman.html

 

[Player_Supreme]

chirp chirp....the sounds of crickets.

 

[elvis aint dead yet]

Problem with the "JUMP INTO THE FIRE" theory, isn't all about embarrassment or anything.

Lets use the snake analogy. SOmebody who is dead afraid of snakes.

They get thrown in with snakes and somehow, the snake bites them. It might not be life threatening, only a little pinch, but believe me, this person will never want to deal with snakes ever again.

It's easy to go jump into the fire if your carrying a water hose, but if you don't have any water and jump into that same fire, you're gonna get burned. And it'll take you twice as long to recover, if you ever want to.

 

[DJ_Dork]

It takes a long while folks to break shyness. Though you can fake it and try to be extroverted about it - the fear of looking bad will always be there.

 

[FlyGuy]

Was that actually you in those pictures or is that someone else's web site and you just used their idea? I'd say if you can detach your ego this would be a fun way of getting over a social phobia. Problem is, most people can't. Anyway, cool idea - gave me a few good chuckles at least.

 

[bugsquish]

I broke my phobia of talking to people by getting a job as a sales assistant in a video game store. I was on the floor giving it the hard sell for PS2's etc. It was great cuz I had to force myself to approach people over and over, or I'd lose my job. There are a surprising number of HBs buy games too.

Now I work as a telephone sales person. It's not quite as good but it helps my telephone game and communication skills.

I would reccomend face to face sales to anyone with a fear of meeting people. It's the best cure I could ever have imagined.

 

[bob2007]

I did a similar thing as a salesperson, lasted 2 days, and I quit cause it was like begging (paid only on comission + soliciting).

Helped a lot, talking to random people.

 

[quakerstate]

I have a lot of depression and social anxiety disorder. I jumped straight into the fire and things were working great till I just had a breakdown and left the world for a while. The pressure just built up in me and just exploded.

I agree that it will take longer if you jump straight in. I think the key though is to learn the lessons needed or you will be fighting this bull**** forever.

I learned that I needed to set boundaries so I'm working my way back up again, also trying to lose the nice guy bull****. Keep yourself busy have goals no matter how small it feels good to complete your goal and tell yourself you can do it and you're not a crazy psycho.