Down with Oneitis: The other smart girl.

[Brainman]

So, I met two girls at this conference. I Made a date to meet up with one and figured I'd just stick with that, forgetting about the other. The thread "smart girl" is about this first girl. I suddenly realized I may be coming down with oneitis. With that in mind I sent this email off the girl number two. We'll call her Dani. I took the approach from some of the earlier advice about girl #1. I am taking a no nonsense approach, since I have nothing to lose:

Hey Dani,

How's it goin? We met at the Bla Bla university symposium, I go to This Other School. Sorry it's taken so long to get in touch, I've been super busy

So, I found you very attractive and intelligent and would like to take you out. Let's get some coffee or maybe a drink.

-My Name

I got a good vibe from her, but she had a bit of a look, like she might play for the other team. I figure, if that is the case, she'll let me know right off.

-BM

 

[drZaius09]

So, I found you very attractive and intelligent and would like to take you out. Let's get some coffee or maybe a drink.

Even with nothing to lose, there's also nothing to be gained with a line like this.

Just because you have options doesn't mean you should deliberately sabotage any other opportunities.

 

[gixxer]

I'm with Zaius, man. First you appologized to her for not writing sooner - you appologized for being a challange - then you compliment her and offer to take her out. You completely supplicated yourself to her 3-4 times in that email. I'm willing to bet you don't even hear back and if you do it won't go anywhere.

I would have said:

Hey, had fun talking to you at the symposium. I'm going to be in [your town] Tuesday. Let's meet up for coffee at [local trendy coffee place]

And, BTW, why did you feel you had to remind her who you were? If you felt like you made that little of an impression you shouldn't have even emailed her.........

gixx

 

[Brainman]

Heh, live and learn.

 

[gixxer]

BTW, no flame, man. About 2 years ago I was saying $hit twice that dumb

gixx

 

[drZaius09]

Originally posted by gixxer
BTW, no flame, man. About 2 years ago I was saying $hit twice that dumb

gixx

Tell me about it... actually no, don't tell me about it. When I think of all the stupid sh#t I've done in the past, I feel a sudden urge to self-mutilate.

 

[Brainman]

No worries. I appriciate constructive criticism. I was a little uneasy with the wording, particularly the apology. Reminding her who I was was something I threw in at the last minute, out of a little insecurity.

We hit it off pretty well. So, there's still a snowball's chance. But, if not, life goes on.

Heaven forbid I should make the same mistake again!!

-BM

 

[Brainman]

She emailed me back tonight.

Interesting response:

Hey MyName,
I'm down for going out to coffee or a drink sometime. I'm pretty
busy too working this summer and I'm also housesitting my friend's
place...taking care of their convalescent pets, so I try not to be away
from them for too long. So considering this slight constraint, if you're
willing to come out near my hood we can meet up. But it is a long drive
from Your Town so I understand if it's too difficult. Let me know what you
think. Talk to you later.
-Dani

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