Doormat / Push Over behaviors - list some
- Thread starter yuppaz
- Start date
Alex DeLarge
Master Don Juan
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- May 26, 2011
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-Going out of your way and canceling plans to help someone versus being actually AVAILABLE to help that person.
-Always "helping" friends or relatives that are broke. (The best way to help them is to tell them to get off their ass and work for a living!)
-Responding to any frustrating or angry behavior from an individual. (They are pissed off at you and want you to be pissed back, be respectful, calm, and always hold your ground in the argument.. This makes way more of a statement than simply calling someone an insult.)
-Accepting a projection of guilt from an individual or peers when you are guilty for nothing (Your friend says that because you didn't lend him money he couldn't take the train to see his girlfriend and she broke up with him. It's not your fault, it's his fault for being financially irresponsible, and it's her fault for dating a man that's financially irresponsible.
-Telling yourself that you can't do something. YOU CAN. The phrase "I can't" is an excuse to be lazy and docile. "I can't get a raise" "I can't find a better paying job" "I can't afford that". Where there's a will, there's a way. Ho Chi Minh, communist President and revolutionary of Vietnam was a restaurant cook in New York City before his political reign. He literally went from the Bottom to the top.
-Letting people put you down. This one can be tough, cause sometimes it's just friends joking around.. But when you have someone trying to sh1t all over your hopes and dreams, you better believe that they're not beneficial to have around. I grew up in a rough neighborhood and had a lot of friends that decided to not go to college, but I did. They all give me sh1t about it and say "Don't forget where you came from" and stuff.. But fvck it man, I'm trying to live my dreams.. Not live my nightmares.
** If you're looking for a good read on being a strong self-sustaining person, The Satanic Bible by Anton Szandor LaVey is great. He really delves into detail about self-actualization and many other sociological and psychological phenomena in present day society.
-Always "helping" friends or relatives that are broke. (The best way to help them is to tell them to get off their ass and work for a living!)
-Responding to any frustrating or angry behavior from an individual. (They are pissed off at you and want you to be pissed back, be respectful, calm, and always hold your ground in the argument.. This makes way more of a statement than simply calling someone an insult.)
-Accepting a projection of guilt from an individual or peers when you are guilty for nothing (Your friend says that because you didn't lend him money he couldn't take the train to see his girlfriend and she broke up with him. It's not your fault, it's his fault for being financially irresponsible, and it's her fault for dating a man that's financially irresponsible.
-Telling yourself that you can't do something. YOU CAN. The phrase "I can't" is an excuse to be lazy and docile. "I can't get a raise" "I can't find a better paying job" "I can't afford that". Where there's a will, there's a way. Ho Chi Minh, communist President and revolutionary of Vietnam was a restaurant cook in New York City before his political reign. He literally went from the Bottom to the top.
-Letting people put you down. This one can be tough, cause sometimes it's just friends joking around.. But when you have someone trying to sh1t all over your hopes and dreams, you better believe that they're not beneficial to have around. I grew up in a rough neighborhood and had a lot of friends that decided to not go to college, but I did. They all give me sh1t about it and say "Don't forget where you came from" and stuff.. But fvck it man, I'm trying to live my dreams.. Not live my nightmares.
** If you're looking for a good read on being a strong self-sustaining person, The Satanic Bible by Anton Szandor LaVey is great. He really delves into detail about self-actualization and many other sociological and psychological phenomena in present day society.
Mike32ct
Master Don Juan
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- Oct 22, 2007
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Tolerating disrespect. Doormats are targets for bullying by both females and males. If she keeps being a b*tch to you, and you just take it, you're a doormat.
SgtSplacker
Master Don Juan
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- Aug 18, 2011
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This is kind of a delicate subject with me. I am a nice guy to women. I just don't have the desire or energy to be an ahole sometimes. But how much BS I will take is all about boundaries and limitations. Just because a woman decides to be a b1tch to you doesnt mean you have to get all upset and defensive just like her. You are bigger than that, just because she throws a tantrum doesnt mean you have to throw one just as big to trump her. you have to have limits and she must know when she has reached them. Take this morning for example, I call my girl and shes a little peeved because I didnt call to say good night. I said I passed out on the couch and she suggested I went out last night, I stayed cool whatever told her I didnt do anything. Then she goes on to say that sleeping on the couch is not good yadayadayada. OK. Then she starts *****ing that she bets I didnt even piss before I went to bed and that thats just being lazy on my part. Because if im wakeful I don't sleep well bla bla bla. So at this point I snap let her know i'm pissed and ask her "WTF is wrong with you today!? bla bla bla" she hangs up. Then texts me later wishing I have a great day saying sorry for being a grouch and that she loves me. Point of the story is that I tolerated her for a bit showing her that I am above most of her menial complaints, but drew a line at a point and told her off making her hang up the phone. Establish your limitations, enforce your limitations.