don't be like my friend...

Skyline

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Some of you guys know that my friend is a bit of an AFC. He's pretty much on shackles when it comes to girls, especially his girlfriend. I love this guy as a friend, but when it comes to women...

Since I'm around him a lot, it just so happens she's there with him. Here are some of the things I've seen and heard over these past few months. This is sort of in response to "PlayHerMan's" post about women wanting to control you. I don't think they do it purposely, but if you let them they will take over.

Here are a couple of flags that I've seen so far:


1. They text nonstop, daily, basically a routine. If he doesn't reply within "X" amount of time she gets b*tchy.


There was a time when we got a new game (Saints Row 3) and we would play it nonstop. He loved it so much that he completed the whole game and basically put her aside. His text replies went from less than 2 minutes to more than 30+ minutes. Then he told me what she said: "I don't like how you put me aside for gaming." :crackup:

My friend LOVES gaming. As soon as she said that, he showered her with attention and basically "reassured" her that she was more important, but let's be honest, she's not.

2. Being around her almost nonstop (2-7 hours a day and maybe more).
Almost everyday after school, he "HAS" to go and see her. Even if he had work, he would "Have" to either go see her before or after. If he didn't he would get cold treatment. He would then proceed to take the bait and chase after her.

Even if he already had plans to hang out with the guys, she would basically demand he cancel. Or he would be showered with guilt- which he falls for 99.9% of the time. Oh yeah, talking to other girls is a no-no. She basically monitors his phone and computer as well.

3. "The Same Level"
Every time my friend wants something that she does not have, she get's b*tchy. There was a time when my friend had a really old phone and he had the chance to get an iPhone. She basically said no because he would become "snobby" like the "rich kids." :crackup:

But guess what? As soon as she got one, it was all of a sudden okay for him. :trouble:


4. His wardrobe.
She sometimes buys him what to wear and what he should wear. Sometimes he shows up with his hair not straightened, and she gets all b*tchy. Basically if he doesn't dress to her standards she's not happy.


The Sh*t tests.
My god, she throws him SOOOOOOO many. Here are just 6 that I've been around to see/hear.

Her: "You spend too much time with your friends/Gaming."
Him: "Nooo you're more important" as he begins to hug her etc. :down:
My response: "Girl's aren't good at games though." + smirk.


Her: "I hate how you complain so much"
Him: "I'm not complaining I'm just saying what's up." :down:
My response: "That makes two of us." + smirk.


Her: "How come you never work out like Frazyer?" (Yes I work out.)
Him: "I just don't have time to." :down:
My response: "Well if you're not loving this terrific body then someone else will" + smirk.


Her: "You'll open the door for Frayzer but not for me!?"
Him: "Nooo?" He had a loss of words, he then proceeded to shower her with affection afterwards. :down:
My Response: "You're a big girl you can open doors can't you?" + smirk


Her: "How come when we go out you never know where to go?"
Him: "Because I don't care, I'm asking where YOU want to go." :down:
My Response: "I always make it a surprise that's why." + smirk.

This one has a back story that I don't know about, but she was upset and he was trying to "cuddle" with her.
Her: "You know what you did." as she pushes him away.
Him: Remains silent and sort of just leans on the opposite side of her looking defeated. :down:
My Response: "Well I got somewhere to be, when you act your age come talk to me." + get up leave.
OR
"I didn't mean to make you feel bad(or whatever I think I made her feel), you know I would never do that."


If I wasn't around to provide comedic relief, I don't know what would of happened.

He then goes on about how women are "confusing" and how "no one would understand them." He KNOWS that hes whipped, but he continues to ignore my advice. :down: Oh yeah, they have been together for 1 year and 1 months with no breaks. How? No idea. Not sure what else goes on behind closed doors, but even if he's getting p*ssy i don't think sacrificing his manhood is worth it.

Be a man guys, don't let women control you. You would think his girlfriend is a complete b*tch, but she's actually one of the nicest girls I know.

If you don't lead, she will.
 

Uncharted

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This happens more often than you think, but yes always keep frame and if she tries to regain it, tease her.
 

Bizzle13

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My housemate is just like this and I've heard conversations go just like your examples. He was doing so well moving on from her then lo and behold just like I said when he went ghost on her she couldn't get enough and was doing everything to spend time with him, became his slave - he did what he wanted no questions asked she was just happy to spend a little time with him when he weren't busy. Now he's gone back to being a little b*tch, I just heard him begging her to come over and that he'd buy her any food she wanted and he'd buy her a gift in the morning.

Wish I could help him, he's a tool when he's chasing her and he's not the same when she's around. As bad as it sounds it's affecting our friendship - you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time around.
 

floydb25

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Indeed. Like I always say - this also applies to people in general. You cannot be submissive, agreeable, passive, weak, or a give-in pushover; approval-seeking type. People WILL take advantage; control, bully, demand, act bossy, be disrespectful, look down on you, sabotage your life, etc. Even if you're "better" than them - they'll still compete with, and bully you into submission. There's a lot of controlling cowards out there.

Can't allow this to happen - because it will, if you do.
 

mbas44

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Having has low testosterone and thyroid problems on the past I often wonder how much of this- men becoming this way- is a result of perhaps losing T levels. I can say from experience that I am a TOtALLY different person when my hormones are on check then when they're not. When I had low t I was very supplicating, cares what others thought, etc...and it was very subconscious like I had no choice. Now with normal t levels etc, it's totally flipped around. Just a thought.
 
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