does the ignoring tactic work online also for online dating?

[drift king]

i know in real life if you approach a girl get her number then ask her out a few days later if she doesn't reply or gives you some wishy washy answer then you should next her and ignore her. if she comes back to you she'll be wanting to see if she stil has you, which you continue to ignore till it reaches a point where she infers you get together.

but on dating websites like pof or match does the ignoring tactic still work?

or would they just not care because they have so many options?

 

[GotED?]

The ignore tactice (short-term NC) ONLY works after you have had a 1st date together and if she becomes flaky after words. If you do it before meeting, you are just giving her an excuse to NEXT you.

With respect,

Exodus

 

[drift king]

this is what happened: i was having a back and forth with a hot single mom over the weekend on pof and we were exchanging quite long paragraphs back (mine longer than hers) then i go for the kill and suggested we get together for coffee at some nice place i know and ask her when her next weekend free was (she told me her kid is starting school and will go see her dad every other weekend so she'll have time to date) and i asked for her number. (no response.)

i left it 2 days then followed up with some BS question of 'do you go to that place near where you live?'
she responds swiftly, saying 'not often how come you ask?'
i proceed to ignore the question (i've been a swift replier up until yesterday and she knows that)
she can tell i'm starting to pay less attention to her and she follows up this morning with 'i went past there the other day my son wanted to go, do you go there? coffee sounds nice though.'

see i know she just made up that BS about her kid wanting to go just to follow up her unanswered question and she's hinting at meeting for coffee without actually giving me what i wanted, which was a time and her number. so i leave it for about 8 hours and i reply back with 'yeah i used to go there' leaving it at that.

i know she's trying to get me to ask her out again and make her chase her but i'm tryna push her to offer me what i want or she won't get my attention. the problem is, she'll ask now about the place i used to go going off on a different direction than meeting up.how do i play this now?

i know she's just attention wh0ring cos she's a single mom, has to stay home all the time and feeds her ego off pof cos she cant go out. she only joined last week and cos she's not a new user anymore she doesn't show up at the top of profiles so if she was getting 200 msgs a day now she'll only be getting 20 and is craving the missed attention.

 

[Skalioppe]

You hit the nail on the head. If she's quite hot, she'll be getting literally scores of offers early on, which will taper off with time. Plus as a single mum MILF she won't want to jeopardise losing any of her new interests, it's great for her ego, hence why she's not committing - she'll be vetting each and have a short-list, picking the best. If you are on her shortlist and disappear she'll be more active to get you back, fearing the competition.

My advice, ask her one more time and don't get into a dialogue about it, if no reply, NEXT and ignore unless she contacts with a concrete time.

 

[drift king]

You hit the nail on the head. If she's quite hot, she'll be getting literally scores of offers early on, which will taper off with time. Plus as a single mum MILF she won't want to jeopardise losing any of her new interests, it's great for her ego, hence why she's not committing - she'll be vetting each and have a short-list, picking the best. If you are on her shortlist and disappear she'll be more active to get you back, fearing the competition.

My advice, ask her one more time and don't get into a dialogue about it, if no reply, NEXT and ignore unless she contacts with a concrete time.

i'll do that. i was considering following up in a couple days with: and yes, coffee does sound nice however one needs to give one their number and a definitive time to meet in order for us to continue this stimulating conversation.

no questions, just straight suggesting what i need. would that be smart in your opinion?

also do you think it was wise that when she followed up with her last response i just said 'yeah i used to go there'?

im trying to balance out going from one extreme to another of giving her a ton of attention (long paragraphs) to suddenly 1 liners without making it so obvious i'm playing a game and have just lost some interest.

 

[pdx1138]

Like a non online situation it's a good idea to not be initiating too much response if she's not responding back.

My sister showed me her profile a week ago and several guys kept sending her messages over and over and she'd only responded to the first message.

I mentioned this in another thread, but getting the phone number asap isn't really necessary. If things go well at the first meet up you can be darn sure you'll have her number. A lot of women have told me they prefer not to because they've had angry guys/stalkers to deal with if the first date didn't work out.

A lot of them (not all of course) are more comfortable giving it out after having met, to avoid any awkwardness later.

 

[incognito42]

I would've moved on after she ignored your message asking for her number. That's usually the time to move on. She probably just wants a chat buddy, which you don't have time for. So you leave it at that and every once in awhile in this situation the chick will pick up on the fact that yOu aren't looking for chat buddies (since you would've stopped pursuing and stopped messaging after she didn't give the number), and she'll give you thee number. By coninuing to message her you show her you're willing to be her penPal

Based on her latest response of "coffee sounds good" I'd say well give me your number then Nd let's plan something. If she responds with anything bu her number then stop messaging and move along

Going NC doesn't work in online dating when you haven't even met yet. Shell get so many guys messaging her and rNdom dyck pics that she won't even remember you in a week

 

[nismo-4]

Judge nismo's ruling is hell no because women get so many messages online, and when one guy goes ghost on her, she won't be affected because her next prospect is just a better looking thumbnail away. Not to mention an inbox full of horny guys.

If she stops messaging after you ask for the number or doesn't give it, she's an attention wh0re who for some reason, doesn't find you to be desirable enough. So move the hell on.

Case closed.

 

[gpshields3]

Like a non online situation it's a good idea to not be initiating too much response if she's not responding back.

My sister showed me her profile a week ago and several guys kept sending her messages over and over and she'd only responded to the first message.

My sister was one of my "quiver matches" on okaycupid.

 

[DonJuanabe]

"My sister was one of my "quiver matches" on okaycupid."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VL4xRwl1f3A

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

I would have dropped her when she ignored the email asking for her number. A lot of women just use dating sites for an ego boost and have no intentions of meeting any guys offline.

 

[Trump]

this is what happened: i was having a back and forth with a hot single mom over the weekend on pof and we were exchanging quite long paragraphs back (mine longer than hers) then i go for the kill and suggested we get together for coffee at some nice place i know and ask her when her next weekend free was (she told me her kid is starting school and will go see her dad every other weekend so she'll have time to date) and i asked for her number. (no response.)

i left it 2 days then followed up with some BS question of 'do you go to that place near where you live?'
she responds swiftly, saying 'not often how come you ask?'
i proceed to ignore the question (i've been a swift replier up until yesterday and she knows that)
she can tell i'm starting to pay less attention to her and she follows up this morning with 'i went past there the other day my son wanted to go, do you go there? coffee sounds nice though.'

i know she's trying to get me to ask her out again and make her chase her but i'm tryna push her to offer me what i want or she won't get my attention. the problem is, she'll ask now about the place i used to go going off on a different direction than meeting up.how do i play this now?

Bro that doesn't make sense. She ignores your email asking for her number, and then you say shes getting nervous you are paying less attention to her?

When you ask for her number, get no response, and then ask a different question later, you are disrespecting yourself. She's thinking "this guy doesn't even respect himself to call me out on not giving my number...lets see how bad I can make a fool of him."

Instead of all that, best to move on. If you really had to respond, would have said "still haven't heard back on your phone number, I assume that's a no to coffee." You have to put your best foot forward and show her you want to meet, and then let her say no.

In this case she didn't even want to play the game so it doesn't matter, but in general. But dont change the subject and not follow up on your own words, shows you are wishy washy, unfocused, lack discipline.