Do nice guys ALWAYS finish last!

[CoolProgram99]

Where, here I am again, with one my super-interesting questions (I know i know, i'm great jaja, just kidding).

I was not long ago thinking about this nice guy stuff, and just began seeing some things I would like to share with you.
I once used to be a nice guy, and while I didn't go getting dates every day or so (I was very busy by the way), I got to meet really great girls who after a time feel in love with me and started to chase me, since I was the only one of her friends who like to be nice with them. They were two (in three years), and they always said things like how cute I was, that I always made them feel better, and so on.

Since I really don't care much on appearance, I gave them the chance. Haha it didn't took so long, but latter my first relationship ended for stupid issues.
When I had the second girlfriend I had, I learned about this site and the ****y & Funny and alpha-male attitute. Since things were getting a little boring with her, I just started learning about this and began applying what I learned with her. However, that was my first and greatest mistake.

She suddenly stopped being nice with me and was said "Woah! What happened with the nice guy I met!?". I began to bust her balls and be ****y & Funny, but she didn't liked it and finally ended breaking up with me. I obvioussly thought maybe I did something wrong, and since I was just learning, I gave myself another chance to try this.
So well, after I recovered up, I gave my chance and started practicing and perfecting my C&F and the new attitute. I managed with it to get a new insight on this topic of attraction, but something was still going wrong.

But since, I haven't been able to get a girl in quite a long while. From the 10 I have dated up to now, they all ended up saying I am just "a funny jerk", or "you are all like the others". However, this never happened to me when I was nice.
There was even one time when I was with this cute girl. And so I invited her for a walk in the park where latter in the night appeared a fair. I spent all the night being ****y&Funny and busting her balls, but after quite a while she said she was incomfortable with me, and wanted to go home.

I usually date girls not based on their appearance, but more on their personality, so I never date the ones you call "top model women", so I don't know if this has some influence in my results. However, since I read this applies for all women in other post, I just kept going. Or maybe is the place here or other things, but here most of the guys who have girlfriends actually are nice guys with them, and I myself have watched it.
Ok, they don't go kissing the girls' feet or being wussy, but they actually are funny with them and they are able to say compliments to girls. Basically, if the girls get a good time and feel with someone who understands them, they accept it. And no appearance matters, as I have seen even ugly guys that are very chased for being what women call "cute" (this means: nice, funny and secure)

My point is, that I don't think it is too bad to be nice sometimes, or to say compliments to women and do some favor, AS LONG AS THIS DOES NOT AFFECT YOU. I was nice and secure, and really didn't cared if they liked me, and then I got two girlfriends. But when I was C&F and arrogant, I just got negative results, but maybe it will work with attractive women.


What do you guys think?

 

[needstochange]

It sounds like your doing C&F too much, completely wrong, or both.

EDIT: Oh and yeah it's okay to give compliments here and there but they have to be sincere and don't give a compliment because you think you'll get something in return. Just don't kiss ass and use compliments rarely.

I would try to balance your former "nice" self with the new you. Sounds like you'll get better results than just being ****y and busting balls all the time. Doing that can get real annoying, real fast.

 

[888]

Two things you're forgetting are Congruence and Surmountability. Both of these ideas can be found in the The Venusian Arts Handbook, so I suggest you give it a read, but I've written below a quick summary of what these concepts are and how they apply to your situation.

The image you project has to be congruent with your actions, or else you will come of as disingenuous. When you started going out with your second girlfriend, in her mind she had the image that you were a "nice guy," and your actions were congruent with this image. By suddenly changing from nice to ****y and funny, your actions were no longer in line with her image of you, so she pushed you away. To her, the change was sudden and unnatural, so she grew distrustful of you.

However, if you keep your "****y and funny" persona up 100% of the time, you will still have problems, because women will not think that you are surmountable. Whoever your target is, she has to believe that you are actually attainable; otherwise, she will not waste her time trying to get something that she knows she cannot have. Women love when you challenge them; it implies that you are secure and have high value. If you are too easy, she will not be attracted to you and may even take advantage of you, but if you are a too difficult, even if she is attracted to you she might feel intimidated and try to protect herself from you (i/e, by saying that you are just a "funny jerk" or "like all the others"). When you do C&F, every once in a while do something that suggests to her that you are capable of being genuinely caring. If you do not throw in these subtleties, she will see you as unresponsive, unemotional, and insurmountable.