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Do I have a stamina problem?

stallion

Senior Don Juan
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I was dating a girl starting out great and since we're at the stage where I can hold her hands and she's resting her head against my shoulder. I wanted to go for a kiss.

The sad thing is, this is the first time I've ever gone this far (shocking huh, at my age) that all the DJ principles and habit are flying out the window fast. Its sooo hard to practice self control when you're riled up so my AFC habits started to leak out. I was amazed that I actually had some DJism ingrained in me but it wasn't enough to cancel all of the AFCish thing I say.

The girl later at night ended up saying how come "guys in the movie say the perfect thing to the girl while i don't get to hear the same thing for me?"

Nonetheless, she was constantly all over me but I took her back home a bit early. The reason was that during the last 2 hours of the date, I was incredibly tired and can barely say much things but mumble. Besides, the mood didn't seem to be a light atmosphere where I should be joking around. I think she was waiting for me to say something a little romantic or want me to ask her out formally... She seemed a bit traditional so I doubt she'll do the asking. She's hinted such as whether I have a gf, etc.

So at her door, we had a long hug but I didn't go for the kiss. Its a stamina problem, I think. I passed out at my bed after that... THe date was only 4, 5 hours long as we did mini golf plus dinner but that wore me out...

Is it just me being a weakling or is it natural that I go all putty when she's so physically close to me and all I have to do is to go for the first kiss of my life???
 

stallion

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haha, very funny.

but seriously, how can I be so worn out?
 

lerxst

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stallion,

This girl was begging for you to make a move. You hesitated WAY too long. When your instinct was to go for the kiss, you should have done it and not hesitated or used self-control. Her little speech about never hearing a guy say something was a big hint for you to make your move NOW. You may not get a second date as you didn't really show you were interested in her that way or she'll see you as another AFC. The problem here doesn't seem like saying AFC things, but acting AFC. It's not your stamina that is an issue, she was dying the entire time for you to make your move which you didn't do. Was your IL high or low for this girl? My advice is go read the DJ bible if you haven't. If you have, read it again.
 

stallion

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Ok, this girl is leaving the town for a short independence day vacation so I won't have the chance to see her for around 8 days.

The problem with her is that she is moving to a city 4 hours away from me. So it might be nice if I can make this into a ONS or a short term relationship.

I'm not sure how much I blew but I'll attempt another date and kiss close without chickening out the next time assuming she still likes me enough.

One thing I have to contribute with this experience is that KINO helped me move things A LOT faster.

It revived a dying relationship I had with this girl that lasted for 6 months. 4 months ago, people here were saying my chance with this girl is basically over. Back then, I never touched and now touching made all the difference...

That makes me wonder whether kino is the sole factor in raising IL for me. If thats the case, does it mean without KINO, my C + F, challenge, and confidence wasn't good enough???
 
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