DJ Opinion requested: AFC move or All-in Bet bravery?

[j8snx1]

call this the biggest AFC behavior in history or the bravest and humbling act, but I'm doing this as both an experiment and to give it my final push to rekindle the fire with the girl i had

you know what, i think i either came across my greatest downfall or the largest goldmine today

i figured @ this point, i have nothing to lose with my ex, but this morning, my ex calls me (i told her yesterday that im moving on lol) and says that she won't be able to make it to school today for doctor's appointments, and i thought, "Okay, thanks for sharing.:yawn: " I was still warm to her, and before she hung up, she said "hey, I just wanted to let you know that I still love you."

Few days ago, before I wanted to tell her I'm moving on, she told me "I want to be with you but i dont want to (in a nutshell)". she was all like "focus on NOW, dont plan too much of the PAST." and other stuff. (my C&F just happened to make her feel like a lower being ***for one thing I did not go overboard; she comprehended it the wrong way i hope***, which was one of the reasons why she broke up with me)

I recalled that and I thought "OMG, that's genius!"
I knew I had nothing to lose, and know that she still 'loves' me; knowing that she felt that way but didnt act on that feeling, i want to be a man and act, and give this a shot:

Me: "Hey, our last phone convo got me thinking about a little something. When you said "i still love you" I thought, "how can she still love me after all this?"
We also talked about how i should "focus on NOW, not the FUTURE" well guess what? I did focus on NOW. Right NOW, I want to just bear hug you and sweep you off of your feet and give you a big fat kiss. Right NOW, I can move on and pretend nothing ever happened between us, but I realized something really important. I can move on in the FUTURE, even after high school, but right NOW, I realized I want to spend NOW with you. Hell, in the future, we might or might not see each other again, but even if it lasts only until summer, I'd like to spend NOW with you

However, if you say NO, I'm still taking you to Prom and we're going to have a great time, and we're not going to be complete strangers, but if you say YES, I swear as a gentleman that, whether we break up in the future or not, I'll do everything in my power to never hurt you like I did again."
**then I'll do the "SILENT PAUSE" like the sosuave site mentioned hehe:cheer:


Like I said, call it AFC, one-itis, cheesy, or manly, but I want to do this:box: !! I just wanted to know what you guys think (either way i'll learn from this), and your opinions would be greatly appreciated. What have I got to lose

 

[Mission]

AFC. So many fish in the ocean bud.

"Lovin somebody don't mean they love you"
-Jack Johnson

Just because she loves you does not mean that you have to love her back, she doesn't want to be with you but says she loves you, want to know something man, she is stringing you along by saying that. She knows that if she tells you she loves you she can still keep you around if she needs you. Don't let that happen, go cold shoulder and don't talk to her.
NEXT

--Mission

 

[Skilla_Staz]

Bizzump.

I've been strung along. You'll deal with it. String her back.

 

[Zerotwoonenine]

man i did something similar to this once, the G got complete freaked out and we had a long embrasing silence, you could try it because your situation is diferrent and you are doing the move on your ex, but it is a bit AFCish and sounds abit clingy, tell us how it goes.

 

[Porky]

if she still loves you, why did she break up with you?

all she wants to do is string you along and lead you on.

 

[Dodgeball]

This girl i was dating, started off smooth and had game, i fell "in love" i know sickening lol and i supported her horse riding, bought her horse books... yadda ya in the end i wised up and broke it off with her she took me for a cvnt!

 

[dannowillbookem]

yeah you're trying to end the game at halftime, bro. just chillax, dont fall into her shiit talking about love, and keep doing what youre doing that makes her say such rediculous things. really, it sounds like itd be entertaining on your side.

 

[j8snx1]

well, i really wanted to give this a shot because Prom is this saturday and I wanted to spend that Prom night with someone more than a friend you know? I was banking on having a lot more intimate time with my girl and next thing I know this occurs.

For the past almost-2-weeks, I've listened to my friends' advices, which were pretty much those "Let things fall into place"..."Just let her go"..."Let her come to you"..."Be a challenge and make her feel like she's lost something important". To be honest, most of them, if not all, were great advices, but none of them are working. I've let her go emotionally/physically for one thing, but I'd like to make it happen again because it felt so right when I had her. I'm not relying on marrying her in the future or anything, but even if it's until summer ends, I'd like to give it a shot and try to make it happen again.

Do you guys agree or disagree that I have absolutely nothing to lose at this point, simply because we're not together anymore and that if I take this risk, I get at least 1% and at most 99% chance of making this happen again with her, where as I have 0% chance if I just let things fall into place? And why do you disagree or agree?

Even though I'm literally making myself vulnerable and putting the ball in her court, I'm sick of her saying I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU but not doing anything about it. I'm gonna be the man and ACT, by taking this leap of faith. Peace!



PS: I couldn't tell what I wanted to her in person today because she didn't come to school. I'd tell it over the phone, but it takes more balls to say it in person, and if I want to do this, I want to go out with a bang and present myself as a confident man by saying it in person.

PPS: I can move on when I get to college, but I want to at least go out with a bang with her for at least my last summer here before I move on to college.

 

[j8snx1]

a big update fellas...

My plan was pretty much shot down at this point, and I didn't even get to say it yet.

She just found out today that her grandma (a cancer survivor) is now diagnosed with cancer AGAIN, and my ex is an emotional wreck. I've dealt with her emotional wrecks a few times, and trying to say things to cheer her up hasn't really worked so well. She "hates it when people try to comfort me" and all.

At this point, me saying what I wanted to say to her will mean NOTHING to her, because her anger pretty much blocks out any emotional stuff other than what she focuses on...

I don't think I'll even bring this up at all...knowing the kind of crap that will happen if I do at this point will only hurt me. At some point, whether it's DURING prom...AFTER prom...a few days AFTER prom, or not, I'm going to give it a shot.

With all that going on for her, should I even do this at all? She'll probably just shoot it down, knowing that she's constantly letting her anger out on me when she tells me what happens in her life. I want to get my AFC side all sorted out right now, and I dont know who else to rely on other than the guys here @ Sosuave

 

[Porky]

a big update fellas...

My plan was pretty much shot down at this point, and I didn't even get to say it yet.

She just found out today that her grandma (a cancer survivor) is now diagnosed with cancer AGAIN, and my ex is an emotional wreck. I've dealt with her emotional wrecks a few times, and trying to say things to cheer her up hasn't really worked so well. She "hates it when people try to comfort me" and all.

Look, don't get me wrong. Cancer is a terrible thing. But this girl CLEARLY enjoys playing victim and she has clearly just been stringing you along this entire time. Breaking up with you "because she's depressed" and hating it when people try to comfort her?

this girl is nothing more than an attention ***** who enjoys playing victim. Stop buying into that bullsh!t!

With all that going on for her, should I even do this at all? She'll probably just shoot it down, knowing that she's constantly letting her anger out on me when she tells me what happens in her life. I want to get my AFC side all sorted out right now, and I dont know who else to rely on other than the guys here @ Sosuave

NO. NO you should not do this at all. You never should have thought about doing this. I have been telling you from the start that she's an attention ***** and that she's just using you as an ego boost.

If she loved you, you two would still be together.
If she wasn't an attention *****, she wouldn't hate it when people comfort her.
If she didn't enjoy being unhappy then she would be doing something productive about her issues rather than wallowing in them and dwelling on them.

What do you have to lose by doing this? How about your dignity? How about your time? can you think of anything more important?

move on and cut this girl out of your life without being mean to her. she'll drag you down. she already has.

 

[j8snx1]

Hahaha you know what guys? You guys are all absolutely right! Thanks for seriously helping me see the light in this situation. :rock:

Damn man, I wish I didn't even think of that now...because what Porky said is absolutely true. I'm only taking this girl to Prom later today (today because it's like 1:04 AM), but that's about it ya'll. After Prom I will no longer associate with her, because life's too short to be going after a girl who says lovey-dovey things but doesn't act on them.

As for Prom, I will tell you guys how things turn out after I get back from it MUCH later today!

before I do go, anyone got good suggestions on how to have a killer time while taking an ex to prom? Not like dancing tips (since freak dancing and slow dancing ARE the easiest of them all ) , but things that I should do as a DJ to show that she's lost me for good, and/or whether I should dance with other girls or not?

 

[PeterNorthisawesome]

Ya do dance with other girls like your friends said show that u've moved on. It'll make her jealous and shows that ur life is complete without her. Have as much fun with friends and other girls as possible. It'll help you move on easier. :rockon: