DJ bible confusion needs to be answered

[The Dominated1]

This is what I don't get.

Do you just grab your balls - ask for a date? and lose challenge / mystery and patience etc. But on the other hand display confidence.

Or do you play the hot / cold game thus not showing your true intentions and raising interest level = challenge / mystery but looking like you don't have the confidence to actually ask them out on a date?

I find if I ask a girl on a date she will say no because my interest is shown too soon. Kill the desperation?

But if I don't ask they end up with boyfriends telling me how bad they wanted to f**k me and wished I had asked them out. Are you a guy that just cant approach?

I would really like to have this cleared up.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Think of it like fishing. Say you want a particular type of fish and it can only be caught in a couple of lakes in a given area. You'd go to those lakes, right?

Once you get to the lake, do you drop your line without bait? No way, you'd bait your hook first. You set a while and get a nibble but it steals your bait, do you go home without catching anything? No, you re-bait your hook because now you know they are biting.

You drop your hook again and get a bite, you pull her in and find it's not the kind of fish you want. Do you settle and take it home knowing it's not really what you want or do you throw it back to fish for what you really want? It's your choice.

You decide to drop your line again and you see in the water just the type of fish that you want. You play in cool not to scare it away. It circles the bait and you give your line a little tug to try to make the fish come after it.

It works and the fish takes the bait. You're excited and get ready to reel it in but you notice that it's a pretty big fish. You want to catch it really badly but you know in the back of your mind that if you tug too hard there is a chance that you could break the line and it will get away.

You draw her in a little while winding the reel, then you ease back a bit. You reel in a little more and ease back again. Reel in and back, reel in a back, again and again, easily.

Slowly, but surely the fish gets closer and closer, you also notice that even though you are putting forth a lot of effort, it is actually becoming easier. You have a big grin on your face because you know that this one isn't getting away.

You reach for your net and you scoop up a beauty. You put her in your ice chest and head back to shore. You're met on the dock by another fisherman who had been watching your progress.

Fisherman: Great catch, it must be great to be so lucky.
You: Thanks, but you don't need luck, just right knowledge and patience.
Fisherman: I don't know, that takes so much work and I don't have much patience, I guess I'm just not lucky.

You say goodbye and walk away with your catch, shaking your head and wonder to yourself how average, frustrated fishermen like him can survive. You shrug to yourself and think "Oh well, just more fish for me."

 

[So pimp its scary]

I like this question... you really are comparing apples to oranges here tho. It's important to know that from the second that you approach a woman, she already KNOWS you wanna phuck. That is always obvious. Anyway...

The idea of grabbing your balls is simply a way of saying 'Don't make excuses, just go out and do it... you will get hurt, but do it anyway. you have more to lose by not doing anything then you could ever lose by trying to get what you want.'

Challenge on the other hand is all about having a life of your own. Don't let the woman decide when and where to do things, have your own hobbies and everything... don't always be available. Don't always give her what she wants... 'You can give a girl the whole world... just not all at once.' It's the idea of who's in control in the situation, are you in control of yourself? Or is she in control of you?

I hope this might of cleared this up a lil bit for ya.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

dont be scared of approaching wh@res be scared when you become their steady b/f

SAY NO TO HOS!!

 

[xblitz44x]

Fvck the bible. I'll probably go to DJ hell for it but fvck it. It needs a huge revamping in my opinion. It is FULL of contradictions. It tells you "be a man, be free" yet it confines you to FOLLOW rules strictly...or you are AFC.

Screw that. First of all, why is it such a difficult, impossible thing for you to approach to begin with? What is the big deal? What is the difference between you talking to a hot girl at random, and you talking to an older lady at random? Why should one be more difficult and require "Tips and Tricks and Methods"? You don't see us reading the bible to talk to Old Bingo Ladies. So start there. Figuure out what has happened in your life that led you to the self-limiting misperception that you need to change and improve anything in order for a hot chick to like you. Maybe you were rejected 3 times in a row before you found this site, and were on the verge of giving up because OBVIOUSLY (after a measly THREE fvckin chicks) you aren't attractive enough being yourself. What HAPPENED that made talking to chicks such a difficult, stressful task?

You approach when you want to approach. Some girls will see your walking right up to her approach as confident, some will see it as pushy and needy, some will see it as dominant. You don't know how each girl will perceive your actions so all you can DO is DO IT and see. It won't sway her decision either way if she likes you so the timing itself isn't worth as much thought as we're putting into it. Be COMFORTABLE being yourself and doing what you want, when you want.

 

[The Dominated1]

Need a bit more imput on this please

Bump

 

[Don Ronny]

Dude.

Your screen name says it all

Dominated1?

So you are already subconsciously putting yourself in a weak position. YOU are supposed to be the dominator! Women want...no they NEEEEED to be dominated. Its hardwired into their genes.

So quit bein such a pvssy and just DO IT!

Approach! Get shot down repeatedly and learn from your mistakes. Even the best DJs get shot down, its really no big deal.

But you wont believe a word of this until you TRY IT FOR YOURSELF!

An internet forum will not help you grow balls!

 

[G_S]

The DJ Bible is a lot like the real Bible, it has some really good parts, some questionable parts, and a few parts that contradict each other.

 

[The Dominated1]

My question has not been answered although the fishing story is on the right track.

I have no problem asking for dates the question is timing.

Ask too soon = no challenge no patience (you are too easy, maybe even desperate) but confident

Ask too late = fish thinks you don’t have the confidence to ask for a date and goes elsewhere (you are too difficult, not interested in her, not showing enough attention).

This is my “EXPERIENCE”

And I have experienced this too frequently lately.

Thought I might try and ask on the forum because the bible does not cover this contradiction very well.

I will continue to get more “experience” but if somebody would like to give some positive advice while I am getting this “experience” it would be appreciated.

 

[E-Z Rider]

You go for the digits and a date as soon as possible. Otherwise, holding back can mean getting in the friends zone, or her finding someone else, or something not good.

What you're confusing is the part about being a challenge. When you approach a girl, all you're really saying is that you find her attractive and would like to get to know her. Don't bullsh!t around on it, finding someone attractive isn't needy. It's normal. And it's much better than the 90% of guys that she KNOWS want to get with her, but won't just come out and say it.

The challenge part comes after you approach. Just because you asked for her number or asked her on a date doesn't mean she thinks she owns you...neccessarily. If you play the cards right, and don't develop too much interest right off the bat, she will find you a challenge, and it will interest.

I think you have to apprach a girl to even *become* a challenge. They have so many guys approach them that they don't seriously consider the ones who don't.

Hope this clears it up- -E-Z

 

[Don Ronny]

Here´s an idea

DONT ASK FOR DATES.

Take control and be a man. TELL her

"Hey, I am going to blahblahblah. (Then you hype it up) Oh man, its gonna be so much fun etc etc...We should totally hang!"

Makes a big difference if you pose the samething as a question

"Hey, would you like to go out with me this Friday? I have am going to blahblahblah."

See how WEAK that sounds?

Grab your balls and tell her what she should do!

WOmen LOVE a man who knows how to take control.

Dont worry, you dont have to thank me, just send money please

 

[Walden]

When you see a beotch you want go straight up to her and talk to her , make no secret that you want to bang her. Mystery refers to the fact that chicks assume good things when they don't know you. So if you're giving a money vibe and the chick doesn't know what kinda car you drive she'll assume it's the money , if she hasn't met your friends she'll assume theyre cool, if she hasn't seen you at work she'll assume it's exciting and glamourous.

Hence mystery. You don't try to keep her guessing wether you like her.

But wait doesn't this put all the cards in her hands (cos you've fronted that you like her ? Yes.
That's why you let her know that she's replaceable , so rather than competing to win you atention , she's competing with the next girl you might meet and pick up, to be your alpha girl.

 

[Phoebus]

Think of it this way; by being a challenge you are not showing a lack of balls. Instead, you are saying "are you good enough for me?" Ask her out, but reamain aloof. Just because you "date" does not mean you will marry, much less enter a LTR. Is she what you want? Seriously consider that question, and let her know you are pondering that...

 

[The Dominated1]

Thanks E-Z that’s what I was looking for!

That post will be in my Bible from now on.

I now have a casual date for tonight thanks to that post

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Don Ronny
Here´s an idea

DONT ASK FOR DATES.

Take control and be a man. TELL her

"Hey, I am going to blahblahblah. (Then you hype it up) Oh man, its gonna be so much fun etc etc...We should totally hang!"

Makes a big difference if you pose the samething as a question

"Hey, would you like to go out with me this Friday? I have am going to blahblahblah."

See how WEAK that sounds?

Grab your balls and tell her what she should do!

WOmen LOVE a man who knows how to take control.

Dont worry, you dont have to thank me, just send money please

I agree with Don-Ron to an extent. I don't ask for a date but I do tell a woman my intentions and she just naturally has to give me her telephone number.

For example, I met a woman on an elevator that I had noticed in a class with me. During the course of the ride down to the lobby (2 floors) we chatted, got rapport, she overtly told me she was interested so I handed her my notebook and told her to give me her number so we could get together sometime for coffee. She gave it to me without any hesitation. It took all of a couple of minutes.

My suggestion is not to build it up like some grand excursion that you would normally do for an anniversary. Keep it light, frivolous and off the cuff and she will feel less pressure and will say yes if you have captured her interest.

As Doc Love says, IL is the key...

 

[DJZ]

Think of it like fishing. Say you want a particular type of fish and it can only be caught in a couple of lakes in a given area. You'd go to those lakes, right?

Once you get to the lake, do you drop your line without bait? No way, you'd bait your hook first. You set a while and get a nibble but it steals your bait, do you go home without catching anything? No, you re-bait your hook because now you know they are biting.

You drop your hook again and get a bite, you pull her in and find it's not the kind of fish you want. Do you settle and take it home knowing it's not really what you want or do you throw it back to fish for what you really want? It's your choice.

You decide to drop your line again and you see in the water just the type of fish that you want. You play in cool not to scare it away. It circles the bait and you give your line a little tug to try to make the fish come after it.

It works and the fish takes the bait. You're excited and get ready to reel it in but you notice that it's a pretty big fish. You want to catch it really badly but you know in the back of your mind that if you tug too hard there is a chance that you could break the line and it will get away.

You draw her in a little while winding the reel, then you ease back a bit. You reel in a little more and ease back again. Reel in and back, reel in a back, again and again, easily.

Slowly, but surely the fish gets closer and closer, you also notice that even though you are putting forth a lot of effort, it is actually becoming easier. You have a big grin on your face because you know that this one isn't getting away.

You reach for your net and you scoop up a beauty. You put her in your ice chest and head back to shore. You're met on the dock by another fisherman who had been watching your progress.

Fisherman: Great catch, it must be great to be so lucky.
You: Thanks, but you don't need luck, just right knowledge and patience.
Fisherman: I don't know, that takes so much work and I don't have much patience, I guess I'm just not lucky.

You say goodbye and walk away with your catch, shaking your head and wonder to yourself how average, frustrated fishermen like him can survive. You shrug to yourself and think "Oh well, just more fish for me."

Awesome post dude! The best part is the fight, the reeling her in, just like in fishing, the most exciting part is setting that hook and working the fish in. I know guys who go out asking for numbers just b/c they enjoy the satisfaction of getting the number. They never call any of the girls that they get the number from. It's just another sport to them.

 

[Jay_VCU]

Average Frustrated Fisherman

LOL