Did You Get Back With Your Ex? Was It A Mistake

[soulforge]

going through a difficult time at the moment..

my ex dumped me last year, just one week before christmas... it was over a petty stupid argument

she accused me of not giving her sex & various other accustaion (all pure bullsh@t)

as you already know, woman will make any & every excuse under the sun to dump you & they will justify it in there mind, by making you out to be the villian


this is the 4th break up.... i know getting back with her is only going to keep the toxic cycle going.

but this chick is begging me BIG TIME to get back with her... she is 46 year old & i reckon she has hit the wall.. she has been chasing me for the last 3 months

i know she is trouble... but starting to feel weak again... thinking about her alot these days & the good times we had

give me strength guys... she is claiming she has changed... but they always say that don't they


did you take an ex back, after she begged you? how did it workout ?

 

[logicallefty]

I wouldn't get back with her as a LTR, it's too soon. But I'd get some lays out of her for darn sure. And if you have to lead her on a little to get those lays, do it. She owes them to you for the pain she has caused you..


The only time I have been in a LTR with the same woman twice is my GF now. We dated in HS back in 1991. She was 18 I was 17. I dumped her back then and honestly neither of us remembers why.

We found each other on FB two years ago, met at a bar with another mutual friend we both knew not expecting anything from it, and it went from there. I think 21 years in between almost doesn't qualify her as an ex. I guess technically it does, but anyway.

 

[soulforge]

here is the thing... i don't think i could just bang this chick as a f@ck buddy.. i,m sure old feelings would re-surface again

its been 6 months since the break up

 

[Ruleit]

Past behaviour is an accurate predictor of future behaviour.

At 43 why are you:

a) pursuing a 46 year old nutjob who enjoys the drama of rinse & repeat with you.
b) not spinning plates
c) chasing younger and less unstable women

There is something wrong with you and not her. Figure out what it is that keeps you in this drama and fix it.

 

[soulforge]

i,m 37 years old... not 46 lol

also i am not pursuing her, she is pursuing me for the last 3 months..

but.. you are right... this is just rinse & repeat for her... she keeps coming back & i let her back in, then she f@cks it all up again

can't keep this cycle going anymore

 

[Ruleit]

At 37, even more reason to stay away.

Seriously, you need to have a good look at yourself and figure out why you keep getting into relationships with trashy women. [Looked @ your past threads]

- Is your picker off?
- Is it the environment (area/city/clubs) you live in?

Only once you figure out what the problem is within you that allows yourself to devalue yourself with low quality women can you move on to healthier relationships.

If you want to break this cycle you're going to need to fix yourself first.

Good luck.

 

[Tictac]

You've split with her 3 times before and you want a 4th?

That's masochism bud.

 

[asa_don]

thousands of single women in your town, you still want an ex for the 4th time, how crazy can you be? you already made the mistake the first 3 times. let her beg, tell her to get lost.

 

[GreyKnight]

You deserve better. It's easier than you think. Plenty of fish out there. You're in the prime of your life - get the best deal you can. "It is better to have loved and lost, than to have spent the rest of your life with a psycho ***** from hell."

 

[Ray S]

Don't waster your time and energy on her. You would feel better being single than going through all that

 

[soulforge]

i hear what you guys are saying... i never really fell for a girl, the way i did for this chick... BIG MISTAKE

anyhow getting back with her, would mean constantly walking on egg shells, never able to trust her & a big big chance of breaking up again... next time round could be much much worse!

 

[Don-Kong]

I understand it still may be painful and confusing.

why dont you go through a check-list of what you want in a relationship and a woman. Also, make a conclusion and stick to it so you have certainty.

Making this conclusion means weighing up the good and bad and finally making a decision to stick with the decision no matter what because you have already analyzed it and it is just consuming and more confusing to keep coming back here.

 

[soulforge]

I understand it still may be painful and confusing.

why dont you go through a check-list of what you want in a relationship and a woman. Also, make a conclusion and stick to it so you have certainty.

Making this conclusion means weighing up the good and bad and finally making a decision to stick with the decision no matter what because you have already analyzed it and it is just consuming and more confusing to keep coming back here.

so i decided to do a positives & negatives list last night, regarding my ex whom is currently begging me to get back with her.. she has been trying her best for around 2-3 months now, after she dumped me just one week before christmas



THE POSITIVES =

01.she is very attractive
02.the sex was good (but that all changed)
03.we have a similar sense of humour
04.we have lots of things in common, we like the sames music, movies, and other common interests too
05.when things was good, there was lots of affection between us


THE NEGATIVE =

01.we have broke up 4 times
02.i don't trust her
03.she is not reliable
04.she can be very cruel & selfish at times
05.she uses sex as a method of control
06.she has 4 children (3 of them are grown)
07.she is 46 years old, and her health is going down hill fast
08.her family, her kids, her friends... all come before me! i come 4th place or 5th lol
09.sometimes she is hot... then very cold towards me
10.she is passive agressive & uses silent treatments to punish you
11.she does not admit wrong doing
13.she broke down my confidence
14.i don't feel secure bieng in a relationship with her, because the slightest argument can lead to her walking out or dumping me
15.she does not keep her word
16.some of her friends don't like me, because of my ethnicity
17.walking on egg shells incase we break up again


i think i could go on... i think it's pretty obvious that walking away from this woman was the best thing i did right???

 

[asa_don]

so i decided to do a positives & negatives list last night, regarding my ex whom is currently begging me to get back with her.. she has been trying her best for around 2-3 months now, after she dumped me just one week before christmas



THE POSITIVES =

01.she is very attractive
02.the sex was good (but that all changed)
03.we have a similar sense of humour
04.we have lots of things in common, we like the sames music, movies, and other common interests too
05.when things was good, there was lots of affection between us


THE NEGATIVE =

01.we have broke up 4 times
02.i don't trust her
03.she is not reliable
04.she can be very cruel & selfish at times
05.she uses sex as a method of control
06.she has 4 children (3 of them are grown)
07.she is 46 years old, and her health is going down hill fast
08.her family, her kids, her friends... all come before me! i come 4th place or 5th lol
09.sometimes she is hot... then very cold towards me
10.she is passive agressive & uses silent treatments to punish you
11.she does not admit wrong doing
13.she broke down my confidence
14.i don't feel secure bieng in a relationship with her, because the slightest argument can lead to her walking out or dumping me
15.she does not keep her word
16.some of her friends don't like me, because of my ethnicity
17.walking on egg shells incase we break up again


i think i could go on... i think it's pretty obvious that walking away from this woman was the best thing i did right???

what the hell do you think? anytime the negatives outweigh the positives you made the right choice. why are you with some old crazy bag in bad health who's almost 50 anyway? if you're not secure with her why the fvck do you want to go back? some guys just do it to themselves, you went back to her 4 times, i cant believe this.

 

[Kailex]

I skimmed and saw that he is 37 and she is 46. I stopped at that.

Just, STOP IT. Go find someone younger. Even Ashton Kutcher gave up on Demi Moore at some point.