Did I call this one right?

[edger]

At my regular club hangout last night with my buddy, and spotted a very attractive MILF(in her 40's) across the other side of the room(extremely rare to see a MILF here), and said to myself, "I've gotta talk to this one, this one's f*ckin' hot". So she's on the dancefloor by herself, and I work my way up to her and cold-approach her with a, "How you doing? You liking the party?" She's like "Yes", but doesn't act interested. So I back away from her a little as I'm dancing, and gesture with my hand for her to come join me. She joins me. She ends up telling me she likes my pony-tail. "Oooh, pony-tail" she goes. I try to get in closer with her, with more body contact, but she doesn't reciprocate. I try to get the conversaton flowing, but it's like trying to pull teeth. I'm the only one initiating the conversation. So, I'm like, "f*ck this", and I back away and continue dancing by myself. So, I don't know, 5 minutes or so goes by, I'm dancing alone, and I feel a tap on my back. It's her. She reaches out to offer me a piece of gum. I'm like, "Ok, it's possible she's interested". So I work my way in to her as I'm dancing and proceed to get closer body to body contact. But again, no reciprocation on her part. Try to also get a conversation going, but again, feels like I'm f*ckin' pulling teeth, as I have to initiate everything. So, I'm thinking to myself, "seems like yet another attention wh*re". So I pull back and continue dancing on my own. So, a couple of minutes later, she's like "I'm going to the bathroom" or something like that, I couldn't hear her too good. I continue dancing in the same spot. A few minutes later, she comes back to the same spot. So I'm thinking, "Ok, she came back". Perhaps she's interested". But then again, I'm also thinking to myself, "What if this is all attention wh*ring?" So I work my way in again to try to get body to body contact, but again, no reciprocation on her part. A little small talk though, she asks me my name, we talk about the song that's playing, I joke with her a little, yada yada yada. So, I pull back again because she's not reciprocating in trying to get close to me with some body to body contact as we're dancing. About 5 minutes later, I take my hair out of a ponytail to fix it. She's dancing with her friend at this point. She see's me let my hair loose and immediately comes up to me and starts straddling my hair, "Oh I love your hair, yada, yada, yada". So, like an idiot again, I say to myself, "Let me start dancing with her again and work my way in close to her for some body to body contact. Again, no reciprocation(at this point, I'm thinking, "For sure, this woman is an attention wh*re". I felt she was one early on when she wasn't too receptive the second time, but said to myself, "What the f*ck, I'm just going to keep at it with her, I don't give a f*ck"). So anyhow, I pull back and just dance away by myself. She's dancing with her friend at this point. 5 or so minutes go by, and as she's passing me, she say's, "I'm leaving". I say "goodbye", and that's that.


Now, like I said, I suspected early on that she was an "attention wh*re", but who knows, maybe I'm looking into it too much, though I'm pretty sure I'm not. Keep in mind, this woman was making NO effort to have body to body contact with me as we danced, let alone dance with me in general. I just want some opinions anyway by the TRUE seasoned players. And please, we're all adults, so be constructive, and not an a**hole about it. I'm not here to argue with anyone.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

You were running before you walked in IMHO. Why didn't you isolate her in a quieter area and have a drink with her?? Build some rapport, spark some attraction and THEN see how she reacted to you on the dance floor?

If you wanted to test if she was truly an AW....all you had to do was flirt and dance with her friend.....



PIMP

 

[STR8UP]

Since when is a little interaction "attention wh0ring"?

You didn't game this chick, you BORED her.

In cases like this, unless she's smitten by your chiseled physique and flowing locks (obviously she was but not enough so) you're gonna need more than "Hey, you havin' a good time?" to make her panties wet.

She WAS interested. most likely. She just didn't see enough of whatever she wanted to see to make her want to reciprocate.

 

[ketostix]

Edger she could've been AW and not serious about being picked up, evidenced by the fact she got some attention from you and left the bar. Or maybe she just didn't feel attracted to you from the get go. What I don't understand is why did you pull back then go right back, pull back and etc. If you are going to do a takeaway you do a total take away until she comes find you or after some length of time that it's obvious she's missed you. Doing a pullback while standing there and coming back in a few minutes later usually comes across as unconfident. That's the only thing I see that I think you did wrong. Also many times it's like pulling teeth when talking to women at a bar but if you hang in there often times you realize the good stuff still comes later on and if they weren't really interested they would've left and they are just playing hard to get.

 

[edger]

Since when is a little interaction "attention wh0ring"?

It had signs of attention wh*ring because everytime she tried to get my attention and I responded, she'd give me the cold shoulder. Typical of what an attention wh*re does. "Pull-push" bullsh*t that they're notorious for.

You didn't game this chick, you BORED her.

This woman hardly even gave me a chance to game her, as everytime I'd try to work my way in and talk to her, she'd act like a cold fish, so, I'd pull back. At one point I was joking with her about one of the songs that was playing, telling her to guess who it was, giving her 3 tries to guess, which she didn't know, then playfully busted on her "for being an 80's child and not knowing who the band was". But she didn't seem too turned on by my playfulness.

In cases like this, unless she's smitten by your chiseled physique and flowing locks (obviously she was but not enough so) you're gonna need more than "Hey, you havin' a good time?" to make her panties wet.

Generally that's how I always go into a cold-approach. A simple, "What's up, you liking the party?", unless I can find something to crack a joke about. But there wasn't anything for me to feed off of, so I just went in with a, "How you doing, you liking the party?". Many times simple lines like this work. It's been discussed here. I realize it isn't the best of the best openers out there, but like I said, I had nothing to feed off of, so I went in with that.

She WAS interested. most likely. She just didn't see enough of whatever she wanted to see to make her want to reciprocate.

Like I said, she wasn't even giving me a chance to run game on her. I could never get to that point with her because the second I'd try moving in to get close with her and interact with her, she'd give me the cold shoulder. Are you sure you still think older women are "easier" Str8up? Lol. Because I think this example speaks a volume or two. This is not the only older woman who's been a tough pull for me as I've said before. I've encountered it quite a lot with the mid-40 yr old MILFS. A lot of you guys say older women are easier, but that's sure not what I've experienced.

 

[edger]

Or maybe she just didn't feel attracted to you from the get go.

No, she WAS physically attracted from the get-go. I forgot to mention, I'm just remembering, within the first few minutes of approaching her, she was like, "Oooh, pony-tail" and smiled.

What I don't understand is why did you pull back then go right back, pull back and etc. If you are going to do a takeaway you do a total take away until she comes find you or after some length of time that it's obvious she's missed you. Doing a pullback while standing there and coming back in a few minutes later usually comes across as unconfident. That's the only thing I see that I think you did wrong. Also many times it's like pulling teeth when talking to women at a bar but if you hang in there often times you realize the good stuff still comes later on and if they weren't really interested they would've left and they are just playing hard to get.

Like I said in my post, she would come back TO ME after I'd pull back from her, and as soon as she'd come back, I'd try to get in close with her and dance, and initiate small talk, but she'd act uninterested.

Total mixed messages with this woman, hot/cold, classic signs of an attention wh*re. But maybe I'm wrong and am overanalyzing it too much, but like I said, it would have to be unlikely. Who the f*ck knows. Maybe there's something that I'm missing. ?

 

[edger]

You were running before you walked in IMHO. Why didn't you isolate her in a quieter area and have a drink with her?? Build some rapport, spark some attraction and THEN see how she reacted to you on the dance floor?

It's pretty hard to isolate a chick you just approach in a situation like this. You have to establish and know there is attracton before you can even do that. The problem here, was that, she gave me the cold shoulder and wasn't reciprocating right from the get-go, so it was pointless to try and isolate her. Had she shown signs of interest, I would've isolated her.

 

[edger]

Yeah Str8up, when she started groping my hair, I playfully said to her, "You want some of it?", and grabbed a chunk of it. That's something I always say to them if the hair thing comes up.

 

[jophil28]

Yeah Str8up, when she started groping my hair, I playfully said to her, "You want some of it?", and grabbed a chunk of it. That's something I always say to them if the hair thing comes up.

Errr,never mind.

 

[decades]

this chick wanted an alpha dude in a suit. but it's hilarious how you find all the attention hors edger. seriously, I think you needed to lay back and build rapport with her over a drink. make her chase. act like the prize. use some direct game on her. edger no offense but if you took a bootcamp I think your game would go up 10 fold.

 

[Da Realist]

One of two ways to see it. One: she was there just to see if she still had it. May have been married or just and older lady insecure about her looks, but she just wanted some attention. Two: you may have just not been direct with her. Maybe you went overboard with the playfulness or just didn't tell her she looked good and you wanted to take her back to your place. I would say it was the second because you could not have been the only guy hitting on her that night. She kept coming to you eventhough there were who knows how many guys there. If she didn't like you, I think she would have moved on to someone else.

 

[wjh]

Errr,never mind.

LOL

 

[Tazman]

I think she was attention whoring, I mean she's 40 for christs sake. She should be glad you made any effort, no loss here.

It may just be me, but I don't believe in chasing older women, if they don't make it somewhat easy they can forget it. That's the attraction to cougars, they're supposed to be easier.

 

[edger]

seriously, I think you needed to lay back and build rapport with her over a drink. make her chase. act like the prize. use some direct game on her. edger no offense but if you took a bootcamp I think your game would go up 10 fold.

She wasn't allowing me to get to the point of building rapport with her over a drink, otherwise I would've isolated her in a more one on one area of the club. That's always my plan. However, she was being a cold fish. Whenever I'd try to dance with her or talk to her, it was a struggle. No reciprocation. Then when I'd pull back and ignore her as a result of this(by acting like the prize and making her chase), she'd try to get my attention. Then as soon as I'd give her the attention, she'd act uninterested again.

Errr,never mind.

You want some too?..............lol, I'm just messin' with ya.

 

[STR8UP]

What's the best way to make a million dollars? Start with 2 million.

What's the best way to get a chick? Start with 2 chicks.

The others nailed it. Spread some love around the club. You would be amazed what a little social proof will do for you. I've been in a club with a group of ladies before where one or two of them in the group was attracted to me. I could just FEEL the other women in the club eyeing me like a fresh piece of meat.

 

[edger]

What's the best way to make a million dollars? Start with 2 million.

What's the best way to get a chick? Start with 2 chicks.

The others nailed it. Spread some love around the club. You would be amazed what a little social proof will do for you. I've been in a club with a group of ladies before where one or two of them in the group was attracted to me. I could just FEEL the other women in the club eyeing me like a fresh piece of meat.

Problem is, I don't have one single female friend who is hot, let alone any female friends in general...not one. And that's because, as I've said before, I don't keep any women around, unless I'm sleeping with them. The only way for me to get any kind of female social proof, is by hooking up with one in a club, but that obviously isn't happening...hasn't happened in quite some time now. April 2007 was my last pull where I took a chick home.

 

[STR8UP]

Problem is, I don't have one single female friend who is hot, let alone any female friends in general...not one.

I have extolled the virtues of female "friends" in the past, but some guys don't listen......

Oh yea, and they don't have to be smokin' hot. Above average will do just fine. Better yet because you are less likely to let your d!ck control the interaction.

And that's because, as I've said before, I don't keep any women around, unless I'm sleeping with them.

Because you only see them as ONE means to an end.

If you can separate your d!ck from your mind you can hang out with women that you ARE or ARE NOT attracted to and reap the benefits. It's not all about the battle, it's about politics as well. The guys who have problems with this are the ones who get caught up with emotions. The ones who "fall" for a chick. Leave the love crap to the women, grab your balls, and go out and have a good time.

The only way for me to get any kind of female social proof, is by hooking up with one in a club, but that obviously isn't happening...hasn't happened in quite some time now. April 2007 was my last pull where I took a chick home.

One of the premises of "club game" is establishing social dominance in that environment. All it really takes is being seen interacting with other women to spark desire.

 

[jonwon]

edger dont worry about it dude.

Happens to all of us.

Sod her she lost her chance.

No point in analyzing it, she is gone, history.

Next!

If you want to know my opinion, it seems she was fishing for attention, maybe she was interested, maybe she wasn't, but what is clear it did not happen, for a number or reasons - She seemed like hard work anyway, no point in beating yourself up over it.

 

[Mr. Me]

Edger, it seems to me that she showed interest for sure. But you kept doing the same thing over and over again, only to have the same results. Specifically, when I read your account of your interactions, you kept trying to get close body contact going.

I don't think you built any comfort in her first though. I think you sent the message that all you wanted was a dry hump/feel on the dance floor. It looks like she was hesitant, maybe it was because if that. Maybe it was because you were younger then she's used to. But whatever it was, building comfort may have gone a longer way. Why does close dancing with her body HAVE to be the goal when at the end of the day it's just about getting a number?

And I'd have to agree that "Wassup, are you enjoying the party/the band/the place?" is mundane and common, although it didn't particularly impact this incident. That's on par with "How you doin'?", "Are you from NY?" and "Nice weather we're having!"

 

[evesman]

I'm going to be blunt, but I hope you don't take it personally.

1. get rid of the ponytail. Ponytails have been out of style for at least 25 years. If they ever were in style. Which they weren't. Or shouldn't have been.

2. How many times have you used the term "attention hor?" If you FOCUS on something, it will become your reality. This is so obviously a self fulfilling prophecy, it's not even funny.

3. When you call women "hors," this is likely a reflection of your own feelings of low self esteem. If you were feeling GOOD about yourself, you would be feeling GOOD about others, and noticing what's positive about them.

4. It's really unbelievable how outcome dependent you are. Instead of wondering if she's attracted, just assume she is, and proceed from there. She's obviously playing push pull game with you, so she is clearly interested, if not strongly.

5. also, it's not the end of the world if this one woman isn't into you after all. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't mean she or other women are "attention hors." It just means that one girl on the planet wasn't feeling you. So what? Just move on.

Conclusion: forget about how one particular "sarge" ends up. Focus on developing your skillset. And before you do that, work on your inner game. That's your main challenge.

At my regular club hangout last night with my buddy, and spotted a very attractive MILF(in her 40's) across the other side of the room(extremely rare to see a MILF here), and said to myself, "I've gotta talk to this one, this one's f*ckin' hot". So she's on the dancefloor by herself, and I work my way up to her and cold-approach her with a, "How you doing? You liking the party?" She's like "Yes", but doesn't act interested. So I back away from her a little as I'm dancing, and gesture with my hand for her to come join me. She joins me. She ends up telling me she likes my pony-tail. "Oooh, pony-tail" she goes. I try to get in closer with her, with more body contact, but she doesn't reciprocate. I try to get the conversaton flowing, but it's like trying to pull teeth. I'm the only one initiating the conversation. So, I'm like, "f*ck this", and I back away and continue dancing by myself. So, I don't know, 5 minutes or so goes by, I'm dancing alone, and I feel a tap on my back. It's her. She reaches out to offer me a piece of gum. I'm like, "Ok, it's possible she's interested". So I work my way in to her as I'm dancing and proceed to get closer body to body contact. But again, no reciprocation on her part. Try to also get a conversation going, but again, feels like I'm f*ckin' pulling teeth, as I have to initiate everything. So, I'm thinking to myself, "seems like yet another attention wh*re". So I pull back and continue dancing on my own. So, a couple of minutes later, she's like "I'm going to the bathroom" or something like that, I couldn't hear her too good. I continue dancing in the same spot. A few minutes later, she comes back to the same spot. So I'm thinking, "Ok, she came back". Perhaps she's interested". But then again, I'm also thinking to myself, "What if this is all attention wh*ring?" So I work my way in again to try to get body to body contact, but again, no reciprocation on her part. A little small talk though, she asks me my name, we talk about the song that's playing, I joke with her a little, yada yada yada. So, I pull back again because she's not reciprocating in trying to get close to me with some body to body contact as we're dancing. About 5 minutes later, I take my hair out of a ponytail to fix it. She's dancing with her friend at this point. She see's me let my hair loose and immediately comes up to me and starts straddling my hair, "Oh I love your hair, yada, yada, yada". So, like an idiot again, I say to myself, "Let me start dancing with her again and work my way in close to her for some body to body contact. Again, no reciprocation(at this point, I'm thinking, "For sure, this woman is an attention wh*re". I felt she was one early on when she wasn't too receptive the second time, but said to myself, "What the f*ck, I'm just going to keep at it with her, I don't give a f*ck"). So anyhow, I pull back and just dance away by myself. She's dancing with her friend at this point. 5 or so minutes go by, and as she's passing me, she say's, "I'm leaving". I say "goodbye", and that's that.


Now, like I said, I suspected early on that she was an "attention wh*re", but who knows, maybe I'm looking into it too much, though I'm pretty sure I'm not. Keep in mind, this woman was making NO effort to have body to body contact with me as we danced, let alone dance with me in general. I just want some opinions anyway by the TRUE seasoned players. And please, we're all adults, so be constructive, and not an a**hole about it. I'm not here to argue with anyone.