Wayward_wanderer
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- Feb 17, 2014
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Hey all, former lurker, and thanks to many good reads/posts here, now a forum poster! I figure this is a good place to ask for advice on this matter.
Long story short, I met a chick through OLD about a month ago. Her interest level seemed high enough (she asked me out for the first date), and things seemed to be going pretty well - We went on a few dates in that time frame - Mutual attraction/interest seemed to be there, physical contact progressed to at least making out, she'd tell me how she enjoys seeing me/wants to see me again very soon, etc, etc. No red flags to speak of.
Now, here's where I fear I screwed up - Talking to her too much between dates. Sometimes she'd initiate contact, but we'd often end up sending texts to each other every few days, and sometimes they'd turn into conversations that should probably have been saved for the actual dates. I won't lie, my interest in the girl is more than just a fb/quick fling, and I caught a bit of oneitis with this one, since I wasn't seeing anyone else.
Of course, the communication began to decline between us, and she seemed a bit less interested/distant than before. I decided to reciprocate, and back off a bit on reaching out to her - Not getting into conversations and such. Not sure if it helped me or not though.
I asked her out on another date about a week ago (the date was supposed to be yesterday), and she said yes/seemed excited, so all seemed well. I decided to lay low communication-wise until then. Come yesterday, she ended up cancelling on me at the last minute w/a total BS excuse (Way too hungover/feeling sick), saying she's sorry, and that we should reschedule. Knowing things weren't looking good, I did my best to play it cool instead of flip out on her/look butthurt, and just responded with "We'll just shoot for another time then" (Leaving the ball in her court to reschedule). No response.
For now, I'm just choosing to move on to other girls instead and invest more effort there, but I'm curious if the communication between dates with this chick was too much/I killed the challenge? (I ask, because I realize an ex/other guy, or a million other scenarios can cause a chick to go cold too) Also, if the situation is at all salvageable, how long should I wait before contacting her again (or should I leave it up to her?). My plan was to go into radio silence for a week or two and see what she does.
Thanks in advance for any advice!
Long story short, I met a chick through OLD about a month ago. Her interest level seemed high enough (she asked me out for the first date), and things seemed to be going pretty well - We went on a few dates in that time frame - Mutual attraction/interest seemed to be there, physical contact progressed to at least making out, she'd tell me how she enjoys seeing me/wants to see me again very soon, etc, etc. No red flags to speak of.
Now, here's where I fear I screwed up - Talking to her too much between dates. Sometimes she'd initiate contact, but we'd often end up sending texts to each other every few days, and sometimes they'd turn into conversations that should probably have been saved for the actual dates. I won't lie, my interest in the girl is more than just a fb/quick fling, and I caught a bit of oneitis with this one, since I wasn't seeing anyone else.
Of course, the communication began to decline between us, and she seemed a bit less interested/distant than before. I decided to reciprocate, and back off a bit on reaching out to her - Not getting into conversations and such. Not sure if it helped me or not though.
I asked her out on another date about a week ago (the date was supposed to be yesterday), and she said yes/seemed excited, so all seemed well. I decided to lay low communication-wise until then. Come yesterday, she ended up cancelling on me at the last minute w/a total BS excuse (Way too hungover/feeling sick), saying she's sorry, and that we should reschedule. Knowing things weren't looking good, I did my best to play it cool instead of flip out on her/look butthurt, and just responded with "We'll just shoot for another time then" (Leaving the ball in her court to reschedule). No response.
For now, I'm just choosing to move on to other girls instead and invest more effort there, but I'm curious if the communication between dates with this chick was too much/I killed the challenge? (I ask, because I realize an ex/other guy, or a million other scenarios can cause a chick to go cold too) Also, if the situation is at all salvageable, how long should I wait before contacting her again (or should I leave it up to her?). My plan was to go into radio silence for a week or two and see what she does.
Thanks in advance for any advice!