Detach yourself from your girlfriend in a relationship

[Capt.America]

in a relationship how do you detach yourself and emotions and like your girlfriend less when u realize that you have fallen a little to hard for her and starting to slip up without actually dumping her.

basically a way to lessen ur feelings for her so u can start thinking rationally again and maintaining power? how can you withdraw ur emotions

 

[VikingKing]

act it. fake it before you make it. dont be so open with your feelings. be reserved. but really if your so worried about this, dump her as nicely as you can, go nc, find a new one... its a red flag if you ask this.

 

[Capt.America]

Why is it a red flag?

 

[kaitracid2010]

Why is it a red flag?

well why do you the need to step back & pull back your feelings?


is she someone you are wanting a ltr with?

 

[youngmack]

Good question. I have this problem too ;/. I find that i fall in way too deep way too soon and i know this isn't normal.

 

[kaitracid2010]

Good question. I have this problem too ;/. I find that i fall in way too deep way too soon and i know this isn't normal.

took me just over a year to fall for mine.... biggest mistake i ever made!

her true colours came out big time....

 

[youngmack]

took me just over a year to fall for mine.... biggest mistake i ever made!

her true colours came out big time....

And its a satirical thing because when you sit here and read things on this forum your like okay next relationship i get in , my game will be tight and i'll be on my toes. When that time actually comes its like you do the opposite and you never even see it coming.

 

[Cremasta]

There's nothing wrong with feeling attached, or having emotions in a relationship. That's kind of the whole idea.

Where it goes wrong is when you start taking shyt from the girl and not putting her back in her box when she steps out of line. Sometimes you have to think "Would I take this crap from anyone else?"
If the answer is no, then you have to deal with it straight away.

It's when she steps out of line too often that you start weighing up whether or not you keep her.

 

[kaitracid2010]

There's nothing wrong with feeling attached, or having emotions in a relationship. That's kind of the whole idea.

Where it goes wrong is when you start taking shyt from the girl and not putting her back in her box when she steps out of line. Sometimes you have to think "Would I take this crap from anyone else?"
If the answer is no, then you have to deal with it straight away.

It's when she steps out of line too often that you start weighing up whether or not you keep her.

i think you are 100% right...

there is nothing wrong with loving the girl or feeling attached... but you have to seriously crack down on any shyt she gives you!!

that means you have to have the balls to walk away if need be.... figure her out early, look for those red flags early... before you fall in love

don't let the sex & her seducing ways blind you!!! that is where you will fvck up...


also it depends on the girl.... some woman want a guy to fall in love with them... for the right reasons


but some b#tches want control over you,once they have your heart...then discard you when it pleases them...

 

[Capt.America]

well why do you the need to step back & pull back your feelings?


is she someone you are wanting a ltr with?

yea i want ltr with her but i dont want to end up in a painful break up or hurt. i want to be able to walk away with no problem. just in case something happens down the line. wat if she cheats on me or does something foul? thats gona mess me up especially wit the amount of feelings i have for her

 

[Capt.America]

and i also think im more invested in this more than her

 

[kaitracid2010]

and i also think im more invested in this more than her

in that case i would be careful dude.... as you have more to lose than her!

play it cool, don't instantly fall in love, don't be chasing her or kissing her ass!

 

[TheCWord]

Being reserved and not vocalizing your emotions, even if it's just for a period of time, should be good enough. The last thing you want to do, and many SS'ers know they are guilty of this, is going too far the other way - being cold or rude to their girlfriends... then the girl leaves and they're like, "****, I really liked/loved that girl - why did she leave?"

 

[bigneil]

Seriously OP, you need to improve your grammar skills and/or stop texting SS.

 

[JoeMarron]

Start seeing her and initiating anything with her less. You should already be putting less into the relationship than she is so if you aren't doing that you're already on the road to fking yourself over. Also find something to do that you really enjoy to take your mind off her. Basically the same things you would do if you were recovering from a breakup.

 

[Capt.America]

so wat im getting here is that i should fake like i dont like her alot? but that wouldnt get down to the real problem would it?

 

[MikeOck]

in a relationship how do you detach yourself and emotions and like your girlfriend less when u realize that you have fallen a little to hard for her and starting to slip up without actually dumping her.

basically a way to lessen ur feelings for her so u can start thinking rationally again and maintaining power? how can you withdraw ur emotions

1) Have other things going on in your life that are more important than her. Goals, a career, hobbies, etc. It will keep you distracted from her and women find a man with a life incredibly attractive.

2) Have other women available to you. Personally, I'm against cheating in an exclusive relationship, but you should always be flirting and gaming other women. It keeps your game sharp and it reminds you that there are plenty of fish in the sea, plus women love a man that other women want to sleep with and she'll be less likely to act up if she knows you have 10 other women dying to take her place at a moments notice.

 

[Olivia]

Understand your mind: understand that she is not yours, no body is anybodys, nothing is anybodys, everything belongs to existence. Whatever she wants to do, let her. Change your attitude towards abundance. Play it cool, and remmeber that she will create as much happiness as sadness in your life, it's balanced. Life is a constant balance between polar opposites.

Understand how the attraction works: we want what we perceive as valuable. It depends on few things: 1 is that we are able to get it - but in a hard way, the harder the more valuable, but still we have to remember not to drop out into the "im never gonna get this so i'll just forget it" -category. Second is that she has been trainder or conditioned towards high status, you know those things. This forum is all about it. So bring them in your life. Act them if u dont have, it doesnt matter whetever you have a single dollar in your life, if you say you have, she will be attracted.
Words are stupid in that way.

 

[Cremasta]

yea i want ltr with her but i dont want to end up in a painful break up or hurt. i want to be able to walk away with no problem. just in case something happens down the line. wat if she cheats on me or does something foul? thats gona mess me up especially wit the amount of feelings i have for her

Yep, I see your problem now. Seriously, you can't go through life with this attitude to things.
Next it will be "I won't go for that great job, because they might not give it to me." or "I don't think I'll go try that new burger joint because it might be terrible and a waste of money."

Relationships work, or they don't. Simple fact of life.
You can either become reclusive about life (look up Hikikomori for an extreme example), or you can learn from everything that comes your way, no matter how crappy it is.

Just have fun with things!

 

[Olivia]

yea i want ltr with her but i dont want to end up in a painful break up or hurt. i want to be able to walk away with no problem. just in case something happens down the line. wat if she cheats on me or does something foul? thats gona mess me up especially wit the amount of feelings i have for her

Let me make it straight. You cannot have a meaningful ltr without emotions, without attachment. Now you are asking the impossible. How can you have a meaningful, loving ltr if you are not even willing to feel emotions towards her. This is the reality, wake up and accept it. If you want to be in love, in ltr with her, then you will feel down when she leaves you. Otherwise just bang her without love. As far as I am concerned, sex without love is stupid as ****. u can masturbate uself, who bothers to go tru all sorta stupid things just for sex.


Love is the most beautiful thing as per say. So i am glad you are willing to fall in love. Go for it boi, you will be the happiest guy on earth but don't run away from feeling down, be a man and face that too.