Dealing with occasional insecurities

[Doctormad]

You know the situation, you go to work/school/social event feeling all confident and all. All of a sudden something happens, could be small...could be big, and all of a sudden you are not at your peak mindset. You then start flubbing even small social talk, which furthur exacerbates the situation and then you realize how insecure you are feeling at the moment. My questions are: Is it normal for even the most confident and secure person to sometimes feel this way? And how do you deal with those moments in which you are feeling insecure.

Me, I try to interrupt my pattern of thinking, if I can or find things to contradict the negative feelings. Sometimes I just plain have a bad day and I say to myself "it was the best of days, it was the worst of days...But all in all it was just a day and a couple of weeks, a month from now it will be forgotten". sometimes, however (today being a perfect example), everything I do I screw up on, and its a bit hard to turn it around. These are the times that I often need help in getting out of.

 

[theSpeculator]

Is it normal for even the most confident and secure person to sometimes feel this way? And how do you deal with those moments in which you are feeling insecure.

Yes, everyone feels insecure every once in awhile no matter how confident or secure you are. Insecurity is an emotion (similar to fear and anxiety) and humans reacts to things with emotions. Sometimes it's just a mood swing--like you're confident one moment then suddenly you're anxious. The difference comes in how you deals with it. Confident, secure people can keep their fears under control. While the insecure people are taken over by it. (Same with DJ vs AFC. DJ can control their emotion. AFC can't.)

However, to determine which category you fall in you need to think about how you feel most of the time. Secure people usually feel good most of the time. Vice versa for insecure people. Everyone has a bad day every once in a while. But if you're having a lot of bad days, then it maybe a problem you need to go check out.

sometimes, however (today being a perfect example), everything I do I screw up on, and its a bit hard to turn it around. These are the times that I often need help in getting out of.

When I start feeling anxious, I just remain calm and keep doing what I was doing before until it pass. While when this happen I am a little off than normal, it doesn't cause much of a problem. What you said above sounds a lot like a panic/anixiety attack which is a symptom to illness like depression, social anxiety disorder, etc. So maybe you should checked it out by googling it first.

 

[sstype]

my situation was like that as well. I wouldfeel confident, and when someone or something bothered me, it brought me down.

Here is what I thought

"I am not a fycking emotional rollercoaster, why should I depend on external validation to determine my mood and mindset. That's chick thinking"

There ya go. Remind yourself that every time you feel down. You are a logical, assertive man. No need to feel this way. Hopefully, you have more important things to do in your life. If you don't I recommend finding some hobbies to keep you busy.

"Busy Hands are Happy Hands"

My commitments:
school
work
gym
boxing
paintball
texas holdem @ Baileys

get yourself involved and you will find yourself less concerned about what X or Y did to you.