Dealing with inexperienced/virgin girls

[itishe]

I got out of a long term relationship last year and after some one night stands and having some fun I decided it was time to try dating again. Started talking with this girl on facebook who is the younger sister of a friend that was in my grade. She's 19 and I'm 21.

Anywho, we went to a show, dropped her off and before I left town we hung out again. We made out, did heavy groping, but when I go to take off her pants she would stop me. I didn't try too hard and decided to try again next time I'm in town.

I come back to town a couple weeks later, we hang out, grope/make out but when it comes to sex/oral she blocks me again. I again just play it cool and chalk it up to her being nervous/not ready.

Now that I'm in town looking for a job we've been hanging out a bit more. She invited me over to her house as her parents were gone. We laid around watching movies, but again it just led to the same thing.


There are a few things that are bothering me about the situation and making me think I should just drop her. 1. I'm not getting sex. 2. She's showing lack of manners. (took her out to get Chinese the other night and she didn't even thank me for picking up the tab) 3. I have to initiate all physical contact. (she recently started making efforts but when she does it it's just awkward. I like to run my fingers through her hair and when she does it to me it's like she's petting a dog.)

__________________________

I figure the best route is to just ignore her for a while and if she asks me to hang out tell her I have plans. Basically show that my interest is waning and make her start wondering.

If next time I'm with her and she stops me from taking off her pants again is it standard to ask, "what's the matter" even though I know the answer?

 

[Igetit!]

I'm going to highlight a few things in your post and tell me if you notice anything.

I got out of a long term relationship last year and after some one night stands and having some fun I decided it was time to try dating again. Started talking with this girl on facebook who is the younger sister of a friend that was in my grade. She's 19 and I'm 21.

Anywho, we went to a show, dropped her off and before I left town we hung out again. We made out, did heavy groping, but when I go to take off her pants she would stop me. I didn't try too hard and decided to try again next time I'm in town.

I come back to town a couple weeks later, we hang out, grope/make out but when it comes to sex/oral she blocks me again. I again just play it cool and chalk it up to her being nervous/not ready.

Now that I'm in town looking for a job we've been hanging out a bit more. She invited me over to her house as her parents were gone. We laid around watching movies, but again it just led to the same thing.


There are a few things that are bothering me about the situation and making me think I should just drop her. 1.I'm not getting sex.

Ok,you called this thread,"Dealing with INEXPERIENCED/VIRGIN girls".


So this girl is a virgin/inexperienced. You've had one date with her,then EVERY OTHER TIME you've hung out it was you trying to get her pants off,get oral,or get her to do something else she's either never done or has little experience in doing.


The date is basically to get the girl comfortable with a guy because us,we're ready to have sex with a girl the instant we see her,but girls have to have more comfort build up for sex.


You've had ONE DATE,but have tried to have sex with her THREE TIMES. The amount of times you've tried to have sex with her is 3 TIMES the amount of time you've spent trying to raise her COMFORT LEVEL.


You need to reverse that. Remember......this is a VIRGIN,a chick who lacks experience. You'll have to put more effort into getting her comfrtable with you,WHILE escalating slowly.



If you've only had one date with her,but EVERY OTHER TIME you've seen her it was you trying to have sex,she's going to think that's all you want her for.


You don't need that thought in her head making things more difficult than they already are.

I figure the best route is to just ignore her for a while and if she asks me to hang out tell her I have plans. Basically show that my interest is waning and make her start wondering.

Don't go there just yet. Go out on another date. Laugh,talk,enjoy just being with each other. Flirt,tease,play with her. Compliment her apperance.

Sexually escalate....meaning hug her,kiss her,basically do a bit more of that "heavy groping" you mentioned earlier. Then as hard as this may be.....END THE DATE.

Yep,end it WITHOUT going for her pants again,or trying to have sex. Tell her you have to go,get one last kiss in,then out the door.


That'll raise her comfort because she won't feel pressured to have sex. You want her to have sex with you because SHE WANTS TO....not because she thinks you'll get mad or angry if she doesn't.


Do that. Then maybe a day or two later,call her up just to talk. Ask what she's up to,tell her something fun/exciting that you've done or that happened to you. Do a little more flirting/using sexual innuendo,then set up another date.



Then on the next date,do the same thing you did before,but this time SLOWLY,GENTLY try escalating to sex.


The excess comfort you build should make her feel comfortable enough to go all the way this time,but even then be careful,because she's still a virgin.


If she tries to stop you again after all this,then you may want to ask her what's wrong. If she gives you what you think is some type of bogus excuse,then I'd go with your idea of slowly backing away making her think you're losing interest.


That should compel her to move forward.

 

[bilboteabaggins]

yes you must escalate slowly, but who has time for that sh!t, forget her and find other girls who are ready to give oral or fvck in a few hours