Confused...

[oakraiderz2]

Ok, theres this girl that i used to go out with and now im going out with her again. The 1st time i would sometimes fet like i didnt want to be with her or any girl and now i feel the same way again. It feels like im cheating myself from something better. I was having fun being single and not tied do to anyone, but now i just really dont want a gf, especially not her. The thing is that i asked her out last night so i dont know what the phuck i should do. Before i asked her out things were fine and i was having a good time with everything, but now its like im missing out on stuff. Does anyone else ever feel like this? Im pretty sure this isnt how im suppose to feel. But i dont wanna hurt her so i dont know what i should do...give me your opinions.

 

[kevbo]

she'll feel a lot better if you tell her now that you don't want to do this than if you go with it for a while and she finds out you've been going out with her more out of pity (since you said you don't want to hurt her) than attraction or anything. also, i do sometimes feel like i'm missing out, but i have enough fun with the girl i'm with right now that it's not really a problem. you need to find someone that you don't mind giving up a couple freedoms for.

with my last girlfriend, it got to a point where i knew it would be best if i broke up with her, and when i did she really didn't get upset even though i was sure she would, but she understood and now we still talk on a friendly basis. trust me, you'll feel much better if you just tell her what you think here, even if she does get a little upset.

actually, it was the fact that i felt like i was missing out that made me want to break up with her. it wasn't goin anywhere, so i felt like it would be more fun to just get out there and have no restrictions for a while, so i did for a few months.

 

[TheSplat]

It's better to hurt her sooner than later

 

[oakraiderz2]

Originally posted by TheSplat
It's better to hurt her sooner than later

Ok i understand that, i know i need to get the balls to do it but its really hard for me. I wish i could just tell her friend to tell her or something but i dont wanna be a bytch.

 

[Luscious]

Let's see...

Ouch. You are in quite a dicey situation.

It seems to me like you want to be free, independent, and start wheeling the women again, that's perfectly fine.

But if you want that, don't yank this chick's leash along with you, because it's not only gonna give her a real heartbreaking, it's also gonna beat the HELL outta your reputation, because she's gonna cry about it to all her friends.

Cut it off. NOW. All you gotta do is talk to her, alone, and tell her that even though you think she's a _____ (insert compliment here) woman, the timing is completely wrong. Tell her the truth: that the way you feel right now, you wouldn't trust yourself to be faithful to her in a LTR, and don't think you are LOOKING for a LTR right now. Tell her you want to save her the pain of breaking it off AGAIN (since she IS your ex, no?), because the last thing you do is want to hurt her. Bring it up once again that, even though she's a really great woman, you can't be involved with her at this point in time, because you are not looking for anything serious, and don't want to hurt her.

Guess what? You just told her the truth, made YOURSELF feel a whole heck of a lot better, and most likely, saved her a boatload of "emotional damage" (as women call it) later on.

See...there is a way to tell the truth, and save everyone a whole lot of sh*tty feelings.

 

[Canadianpimpology]

Excellent post. You just have to grab your balls and remember that your attraction toward her isn't really going to soar up from what it sounds anytime soon.

 

[drixsa]

i dont think its as much about grabbin your balls as it is makin up your mind.

take a day off, dont see her at all or talk to. Sleep on your decision for a day or so.

you can always break it off but you cant always put it back together.

yea being single is fun as hell but you arent gonna be missin too much. personally i dont like to date exclusively but u will still get some a$$ jus not a differet girl every nite.

 

[oakraiderz2]

Well i did it, she said that i was scared and called me a coward but o well, shes insecure and a slut so whatever. Im too good for her...not to sound stuck up but i am.