confused as f***

[mr_guido]

Guys -

so there's this chick who's been really into me, started riding the bus with her like a week ago, anyways, really cute, really likes me, always dropping hints about her and I. So today she came over, no biggie, we just chilled and stuff on the couch - she's really cool. So when I was walking her home about an hour ago I thought 'you know what I'm gonna man up and just do it.' So I said something stupid like 'Hey what colour are your eyes' and she looked at me and I planted a nice firm kiss right on her lips - nothing huge at all, I didn't want that or come across wrong, it was only like 1 second - and she really liked it. Shes like omg did yu just kiss me that's adorable and all that ****. I said did I make it awkard now? And shes like umm not at all I think it's adorable But like 20 minutes ago on her twitter she posts

'Why'd ya have to go and make things so complicated?'

Two minutes later: As in, why must you want more from me? #whycantwebefriends #****

HELP? INSIGHT? DID I F*** UP?

 

[NorwegianDJ]

Why didn't you kiss her again? Just go for it again whenever you're alone. See it through. What do you want?

 

[mr_guido]

What do I want? I dunno, a relationship possibly? The only reason I kissed her is because she's been giving me some pretty big clues that she likes me, and that she wants me, I know she does but I'm sort of confused as to why she'd tweet that if she seemed to like it.

I didn't want to kiss her again b/c it was the first time we actually hung out - only met her like 4 days ago. Looking back, maybe I should've.

 

[mr_guido]

I know she was over the moon with it. But when we're alone next, I probably will kiss her again. One plus side to this situation is that she's not the type to get really awkward about things.....and she's really easy to talk to, so I imagine we'll just talk it over and see what she really thinks, not just what she tweets...any other advice to hopefully move me a few steps in the right direction?

 

[Tortendieb]

I think you still have a chance. But DONT "talk it over". Because if you do this you suggest that it's a really big problematic thing.
How can she say "yes" to you, if you offer a big problematic thing? Instead, offer fun and happiness.
How can she say "no" to you, if you offer fun and happiness? A serious talk is for when you've been together for some time.

What I'm saying: Don't be so serious at a time where you're supposed to be playful, flirting, and kissing! Girls hate making decisions. If you confront her so seriously, and demand a relationship decision, she will bail and flee.

Instead: Continue as you did; ignore the lets-be-friends-suggestion. Ask her out, pretend nothing happened. Put her into a situation like tonight! Kiss her again. DONT ask if you're awkward! Because it will make you awkward.

Don't you get it? She wants YOU to make the decision! To lead her! She wants to lean back, enjoy the ride, and don't worry! She doesn't want the BURDEN of making difficult decisions! You make the decision, and you decide you want her. But you tell her with ACTIONS, not words.

You still have pretty good chances: body language does not lie. You have this gut feeling she's into you, trust your gut. My gut is pretty amazing, it has helped me much more than my brain with girls

Try to relax and be easier about it.

 

[Tortendieb]

P.S: Think again about what you WANT. You want a "relationship, maybe"?

So that means you want to DO relationship stuff. So ask her out to do stuff that couples do. Whatever you imagine doing with your girl, do with her. And without noticing, you will be in a relationship.

But DONT explicitly ask her about a relationship... it's like forcing her to sign a contract. Of course she will run away. Why don't you show her the fun of being with you, and just ask her out? And maybe kiss? And maybe even more?

 

[LearningSlowly]

Ohh, its been a little while since mr guido posted this. Any update man?

But yeah, what it comes down to is: Who cares what she posts on twitter???
THOSE ARE SONG LYRICS. And popular ones at that!

Why would that make you doubt what she said to you in person??

See her again and kiss her more!

 

[mr_guido]

Haha, the old DJ forum is up and running again. nice

I'll post tomorrow, I'm beat. But things are great

 

[mr_guido]

okay

Well, it has been a while since I updated this thread.

Things are great :rockon:

Except that one week where I was so scared I screwed myself over, when I originally posted this thread. But I think the reason I was having some major second thoughts was just because I knew I wasn't totally in with this girl yet, and I wasn't clear through my actions or words in what I wanted.

But that's changed.

In short form, Tortendieb - I did what you said without knowing that you posted that on here (haven't been on here for a while.) Of course, when I said 'talk it over' I didn't really mean to sound like I thought it was problematic, but again I think I was insecure because I didn't get her yet. So I didn't 'talk it over' per se, but it just came up in a conversation we had, of course it wasn't serious - I offered some 'fun and playfulness' as you said' - and long story short, she loved it, but she was confused because she liked some other guy, which explains her mixed emotions but she's disinterested in him now and all into me One up. This one's a winner too - half Italian (represent!), half Arabic, damn what a cutie So all's good now - she's totally into me, always flirts and I give it right back. I don't really hold myself back, but I haven't quite kissed her again. However I'm going away on Spring break on Friday so on Thursday after school I'm going to have to lay it down. I've kissed a lot of girls, but I need to know when would be a good time to kiss her in a way that will win her over for sure - I'm not going to see her for two weeks and I'll only see her after school when we're walking home - so when, where would be good to do this 'winningly'? :nervous:

Thanks for the interest and response on this bros!

 

[NorwegianDJ]

Just think of how ****ing lowly you'll think of yourself when you looked for a perfect time & place to make a move, but failed, as there is no perfect moment, just the fact that you'll have to go for it in order to respect yourself in the morning.

 

[Tortendieb]

Just think of how ****ing lowly you'll think of yourself when you looked for a perfect time & place to make a move, but failed, as there is no perfect moment, just the fact that you'll have to go for it in order to respect yourself in the morning.

This. I've been there too often for comfort. In my experience, the perfect time never comes, or you miss it. Actually, with her into you, you can't lose BUT you gotta go for it.

Just get her in a comfy situation where you both are relaxed and happy. Like after some sports. Like after a movie. Or ice cream. Whatever.

 

[Pozitron]

Tortendieb's advice is real.
Don't make it a routine thing.. like only kiss her goodbye or something. I'm also working on this one.
Don't wait. I went to a movie.. she was next to me. I was all in my head and awkward and I did NOTHING. She mentioned it to me afterwards. DO WHAT YOU FEEL. I think it's better to repair than to do nothing. And no matter how it will go you won't regret it, believe me.
You want a relationship... give compliments when you mean it. Pay atention to little things.. call her or text her at times just to show her you care. You care, right? .. there are a lot of little things you can do that matter. SHe will notice.
Don't only say things on texts.. do it when you're with her also.
Yea.. basically ask her out. Go and do sth togeter and have a good time. Afterwards you'll know when you should kiss her so go for it. Then maybe hug her and that's it.