Confused about Kino/Doc Love

[Booyakahh]

I've only been practicing the techniques from the DJ Bible since October or so and I've gone out on many dates and developed plenty of contacts, but now have come across something that has confused me. I keep reading about the importance of kino and practice it, however the other day I was reading one of my daily DJ tips I get in my email and checked out "Doc Love"s list of 5 things to NEVER do on a first date... the first one was:

"One) Do not touch your date. Don't grab her knee. Don't try to hold her hand. Don't squeeze her shoulder and don't put your arm around her. Men mistakenly think that if they initiate touching that it will somehow "prime the pump" and it will make the woman want to touch them. The opposite is true. The more you put your hands on her the more it inhibits her".
( http://www.sosuave.com/doclove/doc166.htm )

Ummmm... Which is it? Will people with clout please give me arguments for "Kino vs Doc Love". Should i even be reading Doc Love?

Thanks!!!!

 

[Y Trallwng Am Byth]

There is a slight divergence between these message boards and sosuave.com ...

 

[stormwriter]

I too have noticed this disparity when it comes to advice on physical touching. In a way, you have to study both techniques and try both, and learn from your own personal experiences.

That being said, what complicates this issue is that women are all different, and they respond to different things. Some women will LOVE the touching on the first date. I think girls with an extremely high interest level are candidates for touching. Believe me, they will make it known that your physical advances are welcome.
However, be careful of women who don't have such a high Interest Level in you. They are the ones that have the possibility of being turned off by your advances. Remember, you are basically a stranger to them on the first date. Some people enjoy their space. Some people take some time to warm up to you. Also, the hotties are used to being fondled by dudes all the time, so here is your chance to be different. Practice SELF-CONTROL, BE A CHALLENGE, and LET HER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE.

This is one of those things to watch for on Blind Date, Elimidate, and The 5th Wheel on TV. Watch how many AFC's violate a woman's space by getting physical too soon, and watch her reaction...

So, this issue could be solved by asking yourself, "Is what i'm doing raising her Interest Level or not?" If NOT, then don't do it. If you are following Doc Love's advice of being a Challenge, you wouldn't be touching her on the first date. Believe me, she will know you are interested in her - why the hell is she on a date with you?

My quick personal experience: I picked up this girl for a first date. This was the 96 out of a 100 that i keep yapping about. (Incidentally, i said one of the stupidest things in the history of dating to her - the FIRST WORDS out of my mouth. I had saw pictures of her beforehand, and when she opened the door of her car, i said, "Whoa, you look much older in person!" She said, "You might not want to tell a woman approaching 30 that she looks older in person..." I thought i was dead in the water.) So, she gets in my car, and i apologized for my stupid comment and tapped her thigh in the process. Then i freaked out in my head. I thought, "OH MY GOD! I BROKE DOC LOVE'S CARDINAL RULE OF TOUCHING HER FIRST!! CRAP!!! SHE'S GOING TO THINK I'M A PERVERT!!" and then you want to know what happened? She put her hand on my shoulder, squeezed it, and said, "don't worry about it..." That was in the first 3 minutes of meeting her.

I know you want to touch them. We are men, we love women's bodies. It's a very good barometer for gauging their Interest Level in you, and almost all guys do it, but just be different....

...IN AN ATTRACTIVE WAY!

But the moral of the story is to probably not worry too much about it. Go ahead and touch them if the situation warrants it. Just don't rape them or anything. Relax and be cool, and if touching them is cool at that point in time, then its cool. You dig?

The famous jazz musician Charlie Parker said, "Know the rules, then you get to break them..."

 

[Booyakahh]

good story... good advice.

Thanks