Coming Out of a Relationship with a BPD

[Magpul301]

Holy **** what just happened. Talk about the most emotional mind ****ing of my life that happened all in the span of 3 and a half months. I should have never got involved with her and had her move in with me. I ignored all the red flags because she was beautiful, love bombed me like no one else ever has; she mirrored my personality in the beginning then I mirrored hers in the end. I never thought I would ever raise my voice to a female like I did with her, but man she knew how to get under my skin.

Her mom left her when she was a child, came back in her life when she was a teen and then left again. Her dad is paralyzed from the chest down due to a drunk driving accident where he was struck. He's not her real dad, she doesn't know who her real did is. She had anorexia throughout high school. Diagnosed with depression and anxiety and takes an SSRI for it. Has lived with 3 other guys (including me) since her divorce. Heavy drinker. Social butterfly and loves going out and drinking with friends, high presence on social media. She stayed the night with me the first night we met. We had sex the second night. She told me she loved me on the third night. She moved in after the first month.

I fell hard for that girl. But I knew something was wrong the entire time, it was like an infection that was slowly eating away at my gut but I was too stubborn to admit what was going on. My gut was telling me to run, but the physical and emotional stimuli was too intoxicating to deny. But I'm out now, it's over with her, and after 2 weeks of being apart from her I'm starting to see the light of day.

 

[bigneil]

Jesus Christ if this person joins under one more account and talks about BPD I'm going to become a BPD blogger serial killer. I'm not kidding.

 

[Magpul301]

I haven't been here in over 10 years. I came across BPD while searching for answers to what was going on and So Suave came up in the search results in Google. I have been doing lots of reading since realizing what was going on and this site has provided good info.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Jesus Christ if this person joins under one more account and talks about BPD I'm going to become a BPD blogger serial killer. I'm not kidding.

Hahahahaha cut him some slack man. You know how it is with them borderlines.

 

[stovepipe]

So many threads on BPD have been posted lately. Sounds like you came out the other end in good shape. For that you should be grateful, as most do not. They are addicting like crack, its the withdraws that are hard to get over.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Holy **** what just happened. Talk about the most emotional mind ****ing of my life that happened all in the span of 3 and a half months. I should have never got involved with her and had her move in with me. I ignored all the red flags because she was beautiful, love bombed me like no one else ever has; she mirrored my personality in the beginning then I mirrored hers in the end. I never thought I would ever raise my voice to a female like I did with her, but man she knew how to get under my skin.

Her mom left her when she was a child, came back in her life when she was a teen and then left again. Her dad is paralyzed from the chest down due to a drunk driving accident where he was struck. He's not her real dad, she doesn't know who her real did is. She had anorexia throughout high school. Diagnosed with depression and anxiety and takes an SSRI for it. Has lived with 3 other guys (including me) since her divorce. Heavy drinker. Social butterfly and loves going out and drinking with friends, high presence on social media. She stayed the night with me the first night we met. We had sex the second night. She told me she loved me on the third night. She moved in after the first month.

I fell hard for that girl. But I knew something was wrong the entire time, it was like an infection that was slowly eating away at my gut but I was too stubborn to admit what was going on. My gut was telling me to run, but the physical and emotional stimuli was too intoxicating to deny. But I'm out now, it's over with her, and after 2 weeks of being apart from her I'm starting to see the light of day.

It'll take about 2x the time of the relationship to heal completely.
Trust me it gets better exponentially.

Immediately use this time to workout, eat right, approach other women, get out there and the moment you feel complacent, read some awesome books, this where I wasted some time I should've used up while I was mind****ed.

Spin other women, if you can't do that, you have to learn now.

I've been exactly where you are, similar emotions, it'll get better.

We love you man. Begin the redpill journey.

 

[Magpul301]

So many threads on BPD have been posted lately. Sounds like you came out the other end in good shape. For that you should be grateful, as most do not. They are addicting like crack, its the withdraws that are hard to get over.

She was very addicting and I guess there was a part of me that knew I was being played with the entire time. But for some reason I kept playing this game. I think a part of me liked it as sick as it sounds and it's caused me to really take a look at myself and why I would want to ever be involved with someone that does not have the emotional capacity to truly love someone. Never again.

 

[bigneil]

That does it. To help men here cope (men as opposed to she-males who want to commiserate and develop strategies to manipulate psychos), every time you whiners talk about your BPD girls (you wish, but we'll humor you), I'm posting more photos of my (twice diagnosed, but now cured under my care) BPD girl who never painted me black (photos I took - this week - not photos I downloaded from her FB like a stalker).


Figure 1 - One minute she loved you...


Figure 2 - ...and the next minute she dumped your sorry ass! She was too good for you!

 

[Magpul301]

It'll take about 2x the time of the relationship to heal completely.
Trust me it gets better exponentially.

Immediately use this time to workout, eat right, approach other women, get out there and the moment you feel complacent, read some awesome books, this where I wasted some time I should've used up while I was mind****ed.

Spin other women, if you can't do that, you have to learn now.

I've been exactly where you are, similar emotions, it'll get better.

We love you man. Begin the redpill journey.

Thanks man, I appreciate that. I'm getting back in the gym and already have multiple girls lined up. Getting back into the guitar and vocals again too. It's weird but I'm actually thankful I've experienced this, I feel like I have grown immeasurably with accepting what has happened to me in the past couple of weeks and making the conscious decision to become stronger for it.

Reading experiences here of other men experiencing similar has been a great tool in the realization of what I just got out of.

 

[stovepipe]

She was very addicting and I guess there was a part of me that knew I was being played with the entire time. But for some reason I kept playing this game. I think a part of me liked it as sick as it sounds and it's caused me to really take a look at myself and why I would want to ever be involved with someone that does not have the emotional capacity to truly love someone. Never again.

My ex was very beautiful, seductive and addicting. Ignored the million rad flags and I fell for it all hook, line and sinker. I kept playing her game, she kept laughing at me for doing so. Looking back, she really had the emotional capacity of a 5 year old. Some days I wish I could go back in time and do it again with what I've learned about myself and Cluster B's.

Thanks man, I appreciate that. I'm getting back in the gym and already have multiple girls lined up. Getting back into the guitar and vocals again too. It's weird but I'm actually thankful I've experienced this, I feel like I have grown immeasurably with accepting what has happened to me in the past couple of weeks and making the conscious decision to become stronger for it.

Reading experiences here of other men experiencing similar has been a great tool in the realization of what I just got out of.

It can be a very valuable experience that works to ones advantage to mold them into the strongest version of themselves.

But for some, it can be years or a lifetime of pain and misery. It usually hits the insecure, codependent beta male with minimal female experience the most, which sad to say is me.

I've kind of already excepted the fact she will haunt my brain forever and I'll live every single day carrying around this shame,guilt and regret for the remainder of my life. While I did learn everything about why I stayed so long (2 years), why I let a women abuse me, manipulate, gaslight, all stems from my childhood abuse. There are no words to explain the extreme pain of shame and regret I feel everyday since she left. Almost two hospital visits from severe panic/anxiety attacks. Be thankful and blessed you got out when you did.

 

[randalljohnson]

How did she dump u

 

[bigneil]

How did she dump u

u??

Thank you for not having texted this from an Obamaphone.

 

[Magpul301]

My ex was very beautiful, seductive and addicting. Ignored the million rad flags and I fell for it all hook, line and sinker. I kept playing her game, she kept laughing at me for doing so. Looking back, she really had the emotional capacity of a 5 year old. Some days I wish I could go back in time and do it again with what I've learned about myself and Cluster B's.



It can be a very valuable experience that works to ones advantage to mold them into the strongest version of themselves.

But for some, it can be years or a lifetime of pain and misery. It usually hits the insecure, codependent beta male with minimal female experience the most, which sad to say is me.

I've kind of already excepted the fact she will haunt my brain forever and I'll live every single day carrying around this shame,guilt and regret for the remainder of my life. While I did learn everything about why I stayed so long (2 years), why I let a women abuse me, manipulate, gaslight, all stems from my childhood abuse. There are no words to explain the extreme pain of shame and regret I feel everyday since she left. Almost two hospital visits from severe panic/anxiety attacks. Be thankful and blessed you got out when you did.

Seems like all of these women could pass for some of the hottest we've ever been with. Not only are they extremely pleasing to the eye, but they are able to mirror personality traits with precision. I thought I seriously found my female equal in the beginning.

I have been lucky in the regard that I have been with and dated lots of women, but that didn't happen until my late 20s, and she knew about my struggles growing up with self-confidence and being picked on throughout my school years so I think she was able to use that to her advantage. But I gave her flak right back when she got out of line, and I think that could of been one of the reasons why ultimately she decided to break up with me. She couldn't control me. One of the things she stated during the breakup was "I thought I could change you". It didn't turn out like that.

I'm sorry you have gone through this, but keep in mind the bigger picture. That's what I'm doing, and I know I deserve someone who truly cares without putting on a facade. And now I'm not stupid enough to EVER enter into anything when I see such glaring red flags that are right in front of my face. I was an idiot to think love could change someone with a mental disease.

 

[Magpul301]

How did she dump u

She called me a faggot in front of her friends at one bar 2 weeks ago, then at the next one I walked out on her talking to one of her guy friends about her ex. She had a place to stay that night, I was fed up with her and the way she was treating me so I left and went home. When I asked her if she was coming with, she opted to stay with her friends and get drunk. She posted a Snapchat video of her singing "Another love crash and burns" when I was on my way home. She broke up with me the next day over the phone. She just got all of her stuff out of my garage on Friday. Unfortunately I have to see her again tomorrow in order to give her the rest of the stuff that I missed when I moved her out.

 

[stovepipe]

She called me a faggot in front of her friends at one bar 2 weeks ago, then at the next one I walked out on her talking to one of her guy friends about her ex. She had a place to stay that night, I was fed up with her and the way she was treating me so I left and went home. When I asked her if she was coming with, she opted to stay with her friends and get drunk. She posted a Snapchat video of her singing "Another love crash and burns" when I was on my way home. She broke up with me the next day over the phone. She just got all of her stuff out of my garage on Friday. Unfortunately I have to see her again tomorrow in order to give her the rest of the stuff that I missed when I moved her out.

Did she smoke cigarettes? Seems they're all drunks who smoke. Funny, ex's fiance called her out for being a b!tch in front of her friends at a bar cause he couldn't take her shi!t anymore. She left him at the bar, drove home, packed her things and moved 1000 miles away all in one night. Poor guy was about to get married to this hotty and she left him like a coward for standing up for himself. Guy was not good looking, probably sat around for years regretting what he said that night and still tried to get her back for years.

They're all the same, childish, empty, selfish, entitled losers, who do nothing but break the hearts of many, and blame everyone but themselves for their bad luck, all while having zero empathy for the damaged they caused. They drown themselves in drugs and alcohol to cope with their condition. Can't trust a single word that comes out their mouth.

 

[Magpul301]

Did she smoke cigarettes? Seems they're all drunks who smoke. Funny, ex's fiance called her out for being a b!tch in front of her friends at a bar cause he couldn't take her shi!t anymore. She left him at the bar, drove home, packed her things and moved 1000 miles away all in one night. Poor guy was about to get married to this hotty and she left him like a coward for standing up for himself. Guy was not good looking, probably sat around for years regretting what he said that night and still tried to get her back for years.

They're all the same, childish, empty, selfish, entitled losers, who do nothing but break the hearts of many, and blame everyone but themselves for their bad luck, all while having zero empathy for the damaged they caused. They drown themselves in drugs and alcohol to cope with their condition. Can't trust a single word that comes out their mouth.

That poor fool. She doesn't smoke, but she was smoking when I caught her talking about her ex to her guy friend; she drinks like a fish. That coupled with her illness and the SSRI cannot be a good thing in any way. And you're exactly right, my eyes are wide open now to BPD and I'm thankful I now know what it is and how serious it can be for men who get involved with these vampires.

This is the same girl that talked to my mom about wedding venues and marriage a week before this went down. She got my family emotionally invested in her. The same girl that told me she would never leave me, and that she has never loved another person more than me. All total bull**** and word vomit that meant absolutely jack **** in the end.