COMFORT building issues

[Fotis]

Hey guys I've been lurking this site for a week and decided to post a little question thats been troubling me lately

How do you build comfort?

So, i mean you've managed to attract this girl get her number and now your talking or texting this girl and shes responding well and everything, game is running smooth and your getting pics or whatnot....but yet she refuses to want to meet up.

I dont know but this has been happening alot to me lately and ts kind of frustrating,i feel its lack of comfort or trust. But im not sure...

whats your opinion guys??

 

[ARrocket]

I've been in those situations before. What sometimes works for me is just texting her random crap every few days, like "definition of hilarious is watching people push pull doors," or something else stupid like that. Don't get dragged into long conversations, one or two fun/flirtatious texts after that maybe, let's her know you're human and not some weirdo. Repeat this for a bit, and then try to push for a meet up.

 

[Deadly_Ripped]

making a woman feel comfortable starts inside yourself. When you're comfortable, it'll be MUCH easier for her to be at ease.

To break down individual components of building comfort, here's my take:

1. Touch early and touch regularly. i.e. shoulder, side, elbow, are all great easy places to touch her briefly when pointing something out or when talking and whatnot. Steady escalation of kino makes her feel comfortable with you and frames you as a sexual being. Even GENTLY pushing her if she gives you crap or when negging her is a form of kino and really puts them at ease.

2. Charm her. Make her feel like you're enjoying her company and "basking in the warmth of her presence." That's the best description I've ever read of charm, and I believe that it's true to life. This means being an active listener, responding to her comments with more than "cool" or "nice" or "sweet," and telling her what you enjoy about her stories (for example, "oh that trip sounds like a once-in-a-lifetime experience" with lots of inflection rather than "sounds like fun" with a flat voice while looking at some chick on the other side of the street). This is really just all about having great conversational skills and taking them to the next level by directing them towards putting her mind at ease. Getting her talking is a great way to make her feel comfortable and to make her feel like there's a connection.

3. Properly balance eye contact and posturing - not going to elaborate on those, as I'm sure there are many posts about both.

 

[Amazing]

Talk to women like you are talking to a person.. i know most say "uh thats obvious" but it seems to be really lost what this means -which is to say when you are talking to someone, you want to talk to them as if they are a COMPLETE person, who have:


fun traits
awesome skills
showing off traits
manipulative traits
annoying traits


But you still love them and would have out with them anyway... that's what this "giving love" and spreading it around really is - being cool with everyone even if they are not perfect - because guess what no one really is, and sooner we realize we are not sooner we connect with other women.



You know how people say "just say what's on your mind?"

well, basically that, but keep the filters on "no previous girls EXPLICITLY unless directly related to the convo" so dont bring up exes and **** buddies

dont brag - let someone brag for you. dont say you bought a boat, say your friend did when he is around with you

dont brag about yourself - ACTIVELY say how normal you are and even more important how you mess up yourself too - i recently made a candle burn part of my laptop when high... you bet i told that story to girls


they want to see emotions from all directions - so just talk about interests, where they from, convo will go if you open up enough

enjoy yourselves

 

[GameTime76]

They could just be teases

How are you asking them out. Are you inviting them to join you in some activity?

What kind of stuff are you talking or texting about? Its usually best if you dont text or talk on the phone all the time. Your a man with priorities and things to do. Keep your mystery!

Or if you want to, you could say... "Hey I've enjoyed talking with you and getting to know you and would like to hang out. But, if you wanna play some silly games and not wanna get together just let me know so were not wasting each others time."

 

[Htienvu]

Once you've got her number, don't try build too much comfort using text or long phone conversations. Give her a call, keep the conversation light, fun and short. Offer her a date at the end and have a reason to get off the phone whether she accepts or not.

Comfort can be built on the date itself using Kino, eye contacts and your conversation skills.

 

[Fotis]

They could just be teases

How are you asking them out. Are you inviting them to join you in some activity?

What kind of stuff are you talking or texting about? Its usually best if you dont text or talk on the phone all the time. Your a man with priorities and things to do. Keep your mystery!

Or if you want to, you could say... "Hey I've enjoyed talking with you and getting to know you and would like to hang out. But, if you wanna play some silly games and not wanna get together just let me know so were not wasting each others time."

Yeah i hadn't thought of that lmao i could just be dealing with some teases

and i usually invite them to tag along to the hooka bar, art walks, or maybe even local rock concerts,

as for talking or texting generally all these girls tend to want to do is text, although trying to keep a mystery wouldn't be a bad idea, but idk how i would accomplish that while trying to achieve comfort.

I'm not trying to brag but honestly, i fare pretty well at face to face game, im not a total don juan but i can still lay down some pretty smooth game, but this texting game has me running around in circles lol

 

[Amazing]

Yeah i hadn't thought of that lmao i could just be dealing with some teases

and i usually invite them to tag along to the hooka bar, art walks, or maybe even local rock concerts,

as for talking or texting generally all these girls tend to want to do is text, although trying to keep a mystery wouldn't be a bad idea, but idk how i would accomplish that while trying to achieve comfort.

I'm not trying to brag but honestly, i fare pretty well at face to face game, im not a total don juan but i can still lay down some pretty smooth game, but this texting game has me running around in circles lol

I'd call her then, and just let it flow... talk until you guys are comfortable, if you dont know what to say or there are pauses and she isnt talking up, go "lol awkward silence time..." and laugh it off

texting is great if done right or you have momentum wiht the chick otherwise it's kind of ...weak

 

[ArcBound]

I've been in those situations before. What sometimes works for me is just texting her random crap every few days, like "definition of hilarious is watching people push pull doors," or something else stupid like that. Don't get dragged into long conversations, one or two fun/flirtatious texts after that maybe, let's her know you're human and not some weirdo. Repeat this for a bit, and then try to push for a meet up.

This. It also has the effect of you being on her mind without having to talk hours everyday or text back and forth forever.