College and the Ex. Advice please!

[MCristo]

So my ex gf and I dated for about 2 years and i broke up with her a year ago. She used to be head over heels in love me with even throughout most of the time we were broken up. For the first 8 months she was begging to get back together but i wasn't interested.

Now that I've started hanging out with her more again I realized I really wanted to get back together with her. Apparently she's now interested in dating other guys in order to see what else is out there. She hasn't gone on a single date with anyone else in the year since we've been broken up and she feels like she'd be cheating herself.

It feels like whenever I'm with her I play the game horribly. I cant stop calling her and texting her and it's become me as the pursuer and her as the pursued. It was frustrating as hell for me because I was powerless over this situation and she was the only girl I've ever cared about enough to try as hard as I am (even though its going to **** me in the end I know.) It's not the issue of getting other girls, I can get plenty. I just feel like every other college girl I've dated and slept with since her has been a waste of my time. I just want her now and only her. I really think this is the only girl that I might ever love. I know thats a rookie mistake and I'm putting her on a pedestal but i can't help it. There is so much tension in this relationship. We always hug and kiss everywhere but the lips (she refused to kiss me unless we were dating due to prior experiences with that - we were having sex through 8 months of the past year). She will literally sit there 1 inch from my face and stare at me in the eyes. I don't get it because she acts like she wants a kiss but she refuses to give me one and I've never seen a girl act so interested with all the signs but refuse to follow up.

The situation now is we're going to date but we are also both available to date other people. At the end of the relationship this is exactly what I wanted but now it's really not. I know in most cases it's a complete waste of my time because I'm not just looking for ass. She's the only girl I've ever cared about though and we used to have something amazing. I really dont know what to do. This is ruining my game with all girls and not just her because I cant get my mind off of her. She texts me almost everyday regardless of if i text her and acts so interested otherwise.

I dont know if she's afraid of being hurt again or if this is really what she wants. I can't see how she got so cold all of a sudden and all I want is to try things again with her. I know this open relationship could and probably will **** me in the end but its the only way I actually have the power to do something about this. At least this way I can try and fix things versus sitting there and accepting it at the end.

I really do think she's worth it and I do know girls and how they work quite well.

I just have no idea what to do so please help me out with some advice

 

[WC2]

Now that she no longer has to pursue you, she's not so warm for your form.

Before she actually had to put some effort in to taming you, now she's officially tamed you.

And I have to ask; why are you putting yourself in this position? I've been down this road before. Whether you realize it, you're giving your ex all the power. She now decides whether you two will be together.

Before the power was YOURS. You wanted to date other women and she just wanted to be with you. Now she's in your position. It happens all the time.

Look, if this chick really does care about you then she'll follow your lead. Go and date other women. Don't give her an ultimatum, just go do it. Actions are much more effective than words.

If she does have feelings for you, she will chase you down. However, it's your cue right then and there to MAKE THE RULES THIS TIME. You tell this girl that you like her, but she's going to have to earn it. You've got other things going on, so she better damn well be the hottest thing under the sun since whipped better.

Also, how old are you and her? It's possible she's still in her party stages, so maybe it's just better to move on. However, if she really hasn't boned another dude since you broke up then maybe she was just turned off by your clingyness.

Either way, go do your thing. Trust me, telling this girl how much you love her will not turn her back on to you. You must let her know that you have options and she's just another fish in the sea. Then she'll see that you're not just another fish in the sea and you are harder to attain than just any dude.

gluck

 

[MCristo]

Thanks. My plan right now is to start playing the game with her. I guess I though
it wasn't necessary because of our history but now I'm realizing I have to play her like every other girl. She's almost 20 and was never a big partier. She's more of a family oriented girl and that's why I like her more than all of these other college girls I've been getting.

I've been ignoring her texts since we decided to try this and ill call her in a few days to set something up. I'm hoping that I can get my power back by just playing hard to get while still going on dates with her. Its just hard as hell to completely ignore this and move on to other girls because I care for her so much. Its pathetic the way I've been acting towards her and I hope that playing hard to get and getting myself to be the prize will work and make up for it.