zekko said:
I work with a woman, she's in her late 40s, a bit overweight, not very attractive to be honest (then again, you don't expect women in their late 40s to be hotties). She's married. For years now, she's been taking care of her husband. I'm not sure exactly what is wrong with him, but he's been sickly for as long as I remember. I mean he's lost organs, is constantly going to see specialists, that kind of sick. Sometimes he's bedfast, but not always. When he's not, he can maybe walk a half a block. You get the idea.
I just bring this up to see what the manosphere has to say about this women. He is not exactly in an alpha position. I've never seen her flirt with anyone, or disrespect her husband in conversation. The care she has to give him must be exhausting. He has to be more of a financial drain than even some sort of beta provider, judging from what she says about their medical bills.
It appears to me that this woman either actually cares about her husband, or is doing the honorable thing, or both. Of course, we all know how unlikely the manoshpere considers that. Maybe she is torturing the guy behind closed doors, I don't know.
The manosphere has a built in bias, because those who seek for help with marriage/women end up here. Those with good marriages do not end up here, those who do well with women do not end up here, you do not come here to talk about the nice girls but that is nothing special to talk about, but you talk about the fvcked up girls all the time.
That's why I occasionally like talking about the good girls I've dated. To get some fresh air.
No doubt American women suck compared to decades past, but I think the manosphere exaggerates it a little bit. I've seen good women, good girls. A decent amount of virgins too, in their early twenties. I've seen girls stick through a lot of things and sacrifice for her man. Heck I've had a girl or two do that for me.
It's not to say that I haven't seen conniving women, or cheating women. I have. But over time you learn how to look for the good ones, and what personality, habits, and character traits they display. And these really can't be faked over the long term. There are no guarantees in life but if you take into factors like their familial relationships, what they do in their free time, their habits, are they givers or takers, do they help those in a lower position than themselves, do they drink/do drugs, her sexual history, her views on chastity and promiscuity, do they give you love and gifts willingly, then yeah you are going to find some of the better girls.
If you put yourself in the mindset that all girls are evil selfish b!tches, then you will miss even the few ones that are good... A lot of men complain that there are not good enough women, but fail to see that they themselves are not worthy.
Most manosphere men cannot answer why they should deserve a single chaste virgin who is at least an 8, under 25, who does all the housework without complaining, always defers to her man, sex at least 4 times a week + *******s and willing to follow him in all his life decisions all the while allowing him to spin plates and not offer exclusivity.
lol on some of the manospherian sites like dalrock, heartiste or rationalmale there is the fat dude with a double chin and he describes himself as having aspergers or autism. Then he complains about the state of american women and how he will "go his own way". Well no ****. Did he expect a victoria's secret model? It is unfortunate because of his condition and his weight, but he can't expect a very pretty woman to fall over themselves onto his ****. This is reality.
So many men come to sosuave, or heartiste, or redpill every single day and they think "AHA! I discovered the truth about woman. Now I am so above women, that their slutty ***** selves do not deserve me!" Yet they haven't done jack sh!t except read a random article a stranger posted on the internet. That's good and all, but if nothing changes about your life, nothing will change about the women around you either. That's why I respect and look up to men like Espi, backbreaker, Colossus, Fuglydude, atom smasher etc.. I may not agree with them all the time but:
They don't just complain about the state of women all the time. They actually improve their lives. They workout, they try to attain at least decent careers to sustain the way they want to live, they set clear relationship boundaries and goals, they take concrete actions to improve their lives and their being as a man. These are the men that end up with the better women and marriage quality women. I guarantee you that the old fvcker in your OP was a man of at least some worth that the women found it in her to attach herself to him and stay attached.
I've watched the manosphere grow and the redpill movement being born, and I think a lot of the people who are drawn to these movements need to put their words into action. They constantly **** on women while being in a **** position themselves. Yes the manosphere and redpill contain truths about how women think and act, but if you don't change how you think and act you will be forever stuck in your ****ty state. And the new state is almost worse, because before you could claim naivety but now that you know, and your SMV/MMV is **** and you still aren't doing anything to improve it except complain and take up Sosuave/internet bandwith.
I challenge anyone here, go improve your life over the long term and tell me if the quality of women in your life do not improve. Oh, and reading heartiste, sosuave, or /r/ redpill daily doesn't count as improvement. Only concrete visible things do.
I've taken drastic steps to change myself. I changed myself from an introvert to an extrovert. It was fvcking excruciating. Putting myself out there amongst people I didn't want to talk to. Learning how to small talk. Learning to become interested in a person and talk about them and myself. Learning how to be charming and take control of social situations, from a guy who was a wallflower even during highschool and parts of college. Learning to be a voice people went to talk to for help, or even entertainment. Learning to be the guy who gets people together to hang out, when I used to be the guy who was always excluded from social situations. From a guy who went from skinny fat to skinny to athletic with a bit of muscle on him. Consistently working out and stuffing myself with food was not easy as a guy who was 6'0 and 140 pounds who went to 170 bounds and beyond. Setting future career goals was not easy, when I just wanted to play another video game or watch another movie. Staying inside to study was not easy when all my friends were going out drinking. It was hard to go from a selfish narcissistic person, to a person who generally uplifted people and added value to their lives. It was hard going from an always depressed, wanting to kill myself person, to a person who is content in all situations. And guess fvcking what?
Good girls started appearing gradually. Girls who cooked for me. Girls who were generally worried about my health and well being. Girls who helped me through troublesome times in my life. Girls who added value to my life, that even if I am not dating them anymore, I am glad to have dated them for what they have taught me. Hey maybe I am young and still naive about the nature of the world. That's always a possibility I cannot discount. But the only thing you can truly change is yourself and fvck it if I live the rest of my life as another manospherian in his 30's 40's 50's+ forever bitter, forever weighed down by regrets and defeated by the world. Find the good in your life, the good in the world and the good in others and fvck all the rest. Life is too short to become the male version of a feminist complaining about how there are no good men.
