Called my girlfriend drunk. Said something stupid. How bad is it?

[bizzym]

We just started dating 2 months ago. Last night i had tequila and called her drunk. I said, “yea if you and I were together right now I’d go up to a woman and ask her for a threesome”. Then I apparently kept saying how I’m a pervert.

This morning she said that we needed to talk. She said, Everyone fantasizes, I get that, but now your drinking makes me uneasy (I try not drink around her and told her that tequila gets me wild). She said that when I do drink you clearly want to approach another woman for sex, especially since I told her that’s what I wanted to do instead of keeping it myself. That it really turned her off and this a big red flag. Just kind of makes her wonder what happens when I wants to go out with my friends and end I up drinking.

Isn’t she kind of blowing this out of proportion? How bad is it?

 

[Serenity]

Obviously you should drink less when out or learn how to control yourself. I can get absolutely wasted and I will for sure not do anything near that level of stupid.

I think her feelings about your behavior is reasonable from her point of view, I wouldn't be too happy either if I was in her shoes. It's not so bad that it can't be salvaged, but if you can't change either how much you drink or how you behave then there's no point trying to save this.

 

[backseatjuan]

Problem is not drinking. Problem is calling while drunk. Get serious, in that fcked up state you can't approach anyone and succeed. Much less get a bone and fck two women at the same time. Quit drinking and calling. If you have to, leave your phone at home. Whether you have to leave your phone at home or not depends on how fcked up you get. After certain point, you stop to remember things, if that's the case, leave your phone at home. Second, learn how much you can have safely. For me, I know I can have with my buddy, two of us with something to eat, 3 0.5 liter vodka bottles, or roughly 750 ml of vodka per person, with food. Anything more, and things get wild. Now 750 ml gets me dead most of next morning, until afternoon, so keeping it to 0.5 per person works well, no hangover for me.

 

[djthiago1]

I've broken up with women that drank too much, if she's a decent girl, she'll probably dump you for having low self-control, wish i could blame her, but you kinda brought it on yourself.

 

[sexymanman]

I would say **** like this when i'm completely sober. I don't drink alcohol so women can't have this talk with me.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

She's only using the alcohol as an excuse.

You let on too much.

In vino veritas.

She saw the real you and didn't like it.

 

[BURT MCQUEEN]

We just started dating 2 months ago. Last night i had tequila and called her drunk. I said, “yea if you and I were together right now I’d go up to a woman and ask her for a threesome”. Then I apparently kept saying how I’m a pervert.

This morning she said that we needed to talk. She said, Everyone fantasizes, I get that, but now your drinking makes me uneasy (I try not drink around her and told her that tequila gets me wild). She said that when I do drink you clearly want to approach another woman for sex, especially since I told her that’s what I wanted to do instead of keeping it myself. That it really turned her off and this a big red flag. Just kind of makes her wonder what happens when I wants to go out with my friends and end I up drinking.

Isn’t she kind of blowing this out of proportion? How bad is it?

You fvcked up comunicating with her overtly, taiyuu_otoko is right.

NEXT

 

[backseatjuan]

She's only using the alcohol as an excuse.

Excuse for whaaaat?

Guy got drunk, start yapping like a female, she sees on him a beta. It’s normal. That’s why we limit our drinking during dates.

No, he did not fck up. Lower her IL a little bit? Probably. But that’s ok.

@bizzym we not doing LTR bullsht do we not? Just rotations lol

 

[devilkingx2]

We just started dating 2 months ago. Last night i had tequila and called her drunk. I said, “yea if you and I were together right now I’d go up to a woman and ask her for a threesome”. Then I apparently kept saying how I’m a pervert.

This morning she said that we needed to talk. She said, Everyone fantasizes, I get that, but now your drinking makes me uneasy (I try not drink around her and told her that tequila gets me wild). She said that when I do drink you clearly want to approach another woman for sex, especially since I told her that’s what I wanted to do instead of keeping it myself. That it really turned her off and this a big red flag. Just kind of makes her wonder what happens when I wants to go out with my friends and end I up drinking.

Isn’t she kind of blowing this out of proportion? How bad is it?

What you did doesn't sound that serious, obviously foolish and embarassing but:

1. Everyone knows drunk people especially drunk calls are embarassing and you say stupid things

2. Wanting a threesome is pretty tame and normal, and the worst thing you do is tell her that you want to go ask someone else to join you? That's not even an action and it sounds like even drunk you is loyal.

I think you definitely screwed up by annoying your girlfriend and saying stupid **** while you're drunk but you didn't say anything all that bad and I doubt you have a drinking problem. Let it blow over and try not to make a habit of it.

 

[Barrister]

We just started dating 2 months ago. Last night i had tequila and called her drunk. I said, “yea if you and I were together right now I’d go up to a woman and ask her for a threesome”. Then I apparently kept saying how I’m a pervert.

This morning she said that we needed to talk. She said, Everyone fantasizes, I get that, but now your drinking makes me uneasy (I try not drink around her and told her that tequila gets me wild). She said that when I do drink you clearly want to approach another woman for sex, especially since I told her that’s what I wanted to do instead of keeping it myself. That it really turned her off and this a big red flag. Just kind of makes her wonder what happens when I wants to go out with my friends and end I up drinking.

Isn’t she kind of blowing this out of proportion? How bad is it?

You can still recover from this - but I agree with others the drinking seems like an excuse for her to put you on notice that she may be looking elsewhere. I would play it off as not a big deal and then put in some distance. Because just based on what you've told us here I wouldn't consider what you said that problematic. Now if you are doing this every night that might be a different story, but I am gathering this is a separate isolated incident. I don't think it means you have a drinking problem.

Your bigger issue is like others have pointed out - too much alcohol and there is no filter. This exposes you and you are no longer aloof and mysterious. Therefore, attraction disappears. Keep that in mind next time you bust out the tequila.

 

[BURT MCQUEEN]

You can still recover from this

Yes he can but it's not worth it. In the future she will use the event against him every time when she feel something's off or gets a whim

 

[Alvafe]

serious guys gonna spill the truth

there is not such thing as alcohool changing your behavior, its only make your trueself go out, it break your normal behavior locks, the ones you normally use on society and other people, a drunk can't lie, with is also used as a excuse for a lot of people who behave in a annoying way, or want to take a piss and then blame the drinking.

at the same part I know people use the drinking as a excuse for a lot of sh!t they do, so I don't belive it one second its only drinking


now for the op how serious is this, it will depend on how serious you let it go, since you was dumb enough to not make this as a joke, now you will have to stop doing dumb things in a way she will feel she is right, right now you are lower value then her, good luck trying to change that now

 

[Barrister]

Yes he can but it's not worth it. In the future she will use the event against him every time when she feel something's off or gets a whim

I don't feel like we know enough about this woman one way or another to definitively say that. The OP did not really explain any of her traits or qualities other than that she questioned his drinking habits as well as what he said to her in his tequila stupor. I think she clearly is trending towards low interest. Maybe it's worth it - maybe it's not.

 

[Glassguy]

How would OP feel if his gf approached other dudes for sex when they were out drinking together and then called wanting him to agree to a threesome while she was drunk?

If you want women to respect you and eat out your hand, you cannot do dumb disrespectful shyte and expect them to not react in a negative way.

 

[devilkingx2]

How would OP feel if his gf approached other dudes for sex when they were out drinking together and then called wanting him to agree to a threesome while she was drunk?

If you want women to respect you and eat out your hand, you cannot do dumb disrespectful shyte and expect them to not react in a negative way.

It sounds like the OP only talked about doing that as opposed to actually going out to find women for it

 

[Bokanovsky]

Calling a girl drunk and saying stupid sh!t is a sign of weakness. It's almost as bad as begging for sex. Its a huge turn-off for women.

 

[Dash Riprock]

We just started dating 2 months ago. Last night i had tequila and called her drunk. I said, “yea if you and I were together right now I’d go up to a woman and ask her for a threesome”. Then I apparently kept saying how I’m a pervert.

This morning she said that we needed to talk. She said, Everyone fantasizes, I get that, but now your drinking makes me uneasy (I try not drink around her and told her that tequila gets me wild). She said that when I do drink you clearly want to approach another woman for sex, especially since I told her that’s what I wanted to do instead of keeping it myself. That it really turned her off and this a big red flag. Just kind of makes her wonder what happens when I wants to go out with my friends and end I up drinking.

Isn’t she kind of blowing this out of proportion? How bad is it?

Best drunk dialing song ever. Awesome tune too.