C&F vs Charm

[dj_spain]

My best friend is the most successful natural I have known in my life. I've seen this guy stealing the GF of what you call jeks in a matter of minutes. I've seen the most beautiful girls fall in love with him after one day of meeting him. Really amazing. And guess what, he is with difference the nicest person I know with everyone he talks with.
I've used C&F with moderate success until now. I'm not talking about teasing here or simply making fun of the girl in question, which is a must from time to time. I'm talking mostly about neg-hits.
This guy I talk about doesn't use them at all. Instead he uses compliments in a charming and confident way and he gets much better success than with neg-hits.
It's really strange. He compliments people, not only girls he is interested in, but also UGs and older women. He seems to be practicing this skills 24h a day. When he is talking to someone, he clearly makes that someone like him, and at he same time,I don't know how, he is sending a subconscious message that conveys that he is 10 times better than the person he is talking with.
Has anyone of you noticed something similar? I'm starting to think that neg-hits and stuff like that aren't even necessary,not even with HBs. It is really a little bit contradicting with what is mostly teached on this site, but in real life I see this guy scoring twice as much as any other player, without even trying.

 

[Kerensky]

Your friend is a charming person. Actually, since he is like that to guys too, he would be considered charismatic.

This is a good quality to have and needs to be developed. Notice how he doesn't compliment everyone 24/7 but picks good times to say it. Learn from him. You're right though. This C&F stuff and all the DJ techniques are all very confusing and if you're a truly good guy with a spine, you don't need any of it.

 

[ketostix]

I've been saying I don't think C&F isn't the holy grail to attraction. I do think charm is a better strategy. But just like with C&F and neg. hits, compliments have to be delivred in the right way at the right time. Can you give good examples of how the natural delivers compliments?

 

[I-am-someone]

Ask him how he does it,
Then share his story with us

 

[DeathDealer]

Who gives a shat? Really? Only gay boys believe in charm and c&f.

 

[ketostix]

If this guy's charm technique allows him to be the most successful natural dj_spain has seen, then I want to hear about his technique and maybe implement it into my own game plan. Isn't that what it's all about finding a stragety that works best with girls and your own personality? So my question is how does he act complimentary while still appearing "alpha" and not coming across flatteringly.

 

[dj_spain]

For example the other day we went to a place where we had to do some psycological test for some study we had to participate in.
The girl there was a 30 year old woman. From the beginning he had built rapport with her,he asked her for example: "how much do you get paid here? Do you think we could work here one day?"
The second time we saw her, she had changed her shirt, which I hadn't noticed at all. He suddenly says, in front of her co-workers:"Wow,you changed your shirt! This one makes you look younger and more sophisticated."
Then a HB9 is interviewing him. The test said he was a depressed and insecure person, because we hadn't done it seriously at all. So during the interview he is flirting with her all the time while keeping inventing things about his life, that his parents are in a kind of sect and didn't treat him well in his infancy, how he had caught his girl with another guy the other day and that he needs help. He tells her this confidently and with a subtle smile on his face, while telling her that the color of her eyes is very natural and impressive.
Afterwards,another woman says to us(when my friend isn't with us):"You poor guys, I don't know how you can stand your buddy all the time",saying it with a big smile on her face as if her pvssy was getting wet.
When we are about to go, this HB9 is telling him again the results of his test:"You are very irresponsable but very intelligent."And he replies:"Yes. And you are intelligent, too, and very beautiful, indeed" She starts getting red , looking to the ground, and leaves while laughing nervously.
When he speaks with them you can smell that underneath he is teasing them lightly,and this makes him able to build attraction and rapport at the same time.

I think to be able to do this, you have to have a lot of confidence and all your **** together. Without confidence,charisma,charm and wit he wouldn't be able to do this while still appearing the most powerful alpha you can think of.
The other important thing I think is important for his success is that he doesn't even try to score. He doesn't go out with the purpose of getting dates and phone numbers. He flirts because that's the way he is, without expecting anything in return. His main focus is self-improvement, mostly on sports.
So I guess I will keep watching this guy.

 

[Royal Elite]

Originally posted by dj_spain

I think to be able to do this, you have to have a lot of confidence and all your **** together. Without confidence,charisma,charm and wit he wouldn't be able to do this while still appearing the most powerful alpha you can think of.

you seem to be very observant, which is a good skill to learning. Since you are able to clearly see what your friend is doing, all you need to do is institute what you so cleverly observered. Your friend has left a clear road map to the land of charasma, all you need to do is follow it. Just do the exact same things he does, you seem intelligent enough to do that, so just do it. Also since he is your friend ask him for clear cut advice.

 

[lynch1000s]

"c & f" = b.s.

game is synonymous with charm.

The only problem is that only certain individuals possess the charisma to be a true d.j.

 

[dj_spain]

Originally posted by lynch1000s
"c & f" = b.s.

game is synonymous with charm.

The only problem is that only certain individuals possess the charisma to be a true d.j.

I wouldn't say that C&F=B.S.
I've come to the conclusion that charm and c&f are complementary.
There is a way of teasing while still being charming. Make sure to do it playfully ,only every once in a while and when you have already built some rapport with the girl.

 

[Alpine]

Mmmm. Your friend wouldn't happen to be good looking by any chance? If he's fat and ugly I just might sit up and listen.

 

[Feskaren]

does he really get anyone of the girls or do he just charm them... the description of your friend reminds me extremely of a friend of mine who use the excact same way of complimenting girls... and use a lot of humor and is extremely arrogant.... i find him quite annoying but sometimes hes funny too.but he doesnt get many girls though even though he wants everyone to believe he do... he is quite ugly too but he has alot of female friends... he is always surrounded by people... he can get almost everyone... all kinds of people... guys too to like him... and he can annoy the **** out of everyone as well... even grown ups and teachers... sometimes he makes you like him and then he makes u hate him and then he makes u like him again... xtremely annoying...

 

[dj_spain]

Originally posted by Alpine
Mmmm. Your friend wouldn't happen to be good looking by any chance? If he's fat and ugly I just might sit up and listen.

He's very good looking, tall and muscular, but nothing near model handsome. Not to say that he doesn't take care for his clothes/style too much.

Originally posted by Feskaren
does he really get anyone of the girls or do he just charm them... the description of your friend reminds me extremely of a friend of mine who use the excact same way of complimenting girls... and use a lot of humor and is extremely arrogant.... i find him quite annoying but sometimes hes funny too.but he doesnt get many girls though even though he wants everyone to believe he do... he is quite ugly too but he has alot of female friends... he is always surrounded by people... he can get almost everyone... all kinds of people... guys too to like him... and he can annoy the **** out of everyone as well... even grown ups and teachers... sometimes he makes you like him and then he makes u hate him and then he makes u like him again... xtremely annoying...

He gets the girls. I know what you mean, but it's not the same I was trying to describe. You mean the typical "funny guy" that plays the class clown to overcompensate his insecurities, and that plays all arrogant and ****y, which can be annoying.
I wouldn't describe my friend as arrogant and annoying, just as extremely confident. I think that the most important skill that my friend has is that he controlls timing very well, which is what I'm trying to learn right now. He knows exactly when to give the compliments, when to tease, when to crack jokes and be funny and when to show his serious side. What I've also noticed is that always when he talks ,specially at the beginning of a conversation, he talks with a lot of energy and enthusiasm, as if he would always have a splendid day. Not with the goofy excitement your annoying friend could speak with, I mean an enthusiasm that displays confidence,warmth and power under control.

 

[Royal Elite]

Do you really want to know the secret to your friends success and its the secret to your falures?

Are you ready, wait this is a good one?

Well the reason your friend scores a lot is real simple, you even explained it in all your post. You kept explaining all the things your friend does that you see him do, that you yourself don't do.

Do you get it yet, did you see the secret?

Ok let me stop stalling, the secret is that your friend is a "do'er" and you are not. Most of the guys on this board are "thinkers" where as a true successful person is a "do'er"

I have just rediscovered a child hood practice I had, and was always very successful for me. I was always a do'er, but somewhere in life I turned to a "thinker".

Life is random, and people are different so there really is no "universal" way to do a lot of things, so once you are a "do'er" life is really rewarding. because you will tap into one of the myraid paths too success.

"In ALL labor there is profit, but the talks of the lips only tend to pennury" King Solomon

"Do'ers" will always be more successful then "thinkers" unless you are being paid to "think". And in order to get a job where they paid you to "think" you had to be a "do'er" to get it.

Start doing; that's all a natural really is, he is somebody who does, and does, until he finds what works and discard what doesn't.

 

[frivolousz21]

I have just rediscovered a child hood practice I had, and was always very successful for me. I was always a do'er, but somewhere in life I turned to a "thinker".

thats pretty much on target....once we thought we expiernced enuf we stopped doind and started thinking..ussually about our past failures

 

[Freeman]

Originally posted by dj_spain
My best friend is the most successful natural I have known in my life. I've seen this guy stealing the GF of what you call jeks in a matter of minutes. I've seen the most beautiful girls fall in love with him after one day of meeting him. Really amazing. And guess what, he is with difference the nicest person I know with everyone he talks with.
I've used C&F with moderate success until now. I'm not talking about teasing here or simply making fun of the girl in question, which is a must from time to time. I'm talking mostly about neg-hits.
This guy I talk about doesn't use them at all. Instead he uses compliments in a charming and confident way and he gets much better success than with neg-hits.
It's really strange. He compliments people, not only girls he is interested in, but also UGs and older women. He seems to be practicing this skills 24h a day. When he is talking to someone, he clearly makes that someone like him, and at he same time,I don't know how, he is sending a subconscious message that conveys that he is 10 times better than the person he is talking with.
Has anyone of you noticed something similar? I'm starting to think that neg-hits and stuff like that aren't even necessary,not even with HBs. It is really a little bit contradicting with what is mostly teached on this site, but in real life I see this guy scoring twice as much as any other player, without even trying.

In my opinion, I believe that your friend strongest attribute to his success is his ATTITUDE. Your attitude is what leads to everything else. Obviously he has a very positive attitude which leads to him come off as a charming, confident guy. I bet that he's always trying to be happy despite what may be going on his personal life-Always looking at the brighter side of things. Also it doesn't hurt that he's a good looking guy as well. But like everyone else said, you should really watch this guy-pay attention to his mannerisms when he's around the opposite sex.

 

[tmpgstx]

There's nothing magical that he's doing .. just flirting, but in a sensual way. He is making the girl feel special about telling her how beautiful she is or noticing a change (like changing her shirt) etc. It has to be more about the way he looks and says it, than what is said.

Think about it, if a guy she didn't find attractive at all, would be 'creepy' to her to hear these things, because it's almost personal.

If he weren't good looking, not much of it would pass off and have the effect that it does. By making her feel special and being good looking, that is in a sense charming.

 

[Freeman]

why?

Originally posted by tmpgstx
There's nothing magical that he's doing .. just flirting, but in a sensual way. He is making the girl feel special about telling her how beautiful she is or noticing a change (like changing her shirt) etc. It has to be more about the way he looks and says it, than what is said.

Think about it, if a guy she didn't find attractive at all, would be 'creepy' to her to hear these things, because it's almost personal.

If he weren't good looking, not much of it would pass off and have the effect that it does. By making her feel special and being good looking, that is in a sense charming.

Why O Why do people keep saying: "Its because he's good looking that why he gets all the girls". Its just not true. I know this from exprience. ME and a friend were both going after this girl right..and the end result is that HE got HER. They continued to go out for like year and one time my friend asked her why did you want me over him? HER EXACT WORDS: "HE WAS CUTE BUT I DIDN"T GET THAT FEELING LIKE I GOT FROM YOU". So the moral of these little story is that you don't have to be BRADD PITT to get the girl you want--YOU JUST GOTTA KNOW HOW TO TALK TO THEM!!!

 

[MrHarris]

Originally posted by dj_spain
My best friend is the most successful natural I have known in my life. I've seen this guy stealing the GF of what you call jeks in a matter of minutes. I've seen the most beautiful girls fall in love with him after one day of meeting him. Really amazing. And guess what, he is with difference the nicest person I know with everyone he talks with.
I've used C&F with moderate success until now. I'm not talking about teasing here or simply making fun of the girl in question, which is a must from time to time. I'm talking mostly about neg-hits.
This guy I talk about doesn't use them at all. Instead he uses compliments in a charming and confident way and he gets much better success than with neg-hits.
It's really strange. He compliments people, not only girls he is interested in, but also UGs and older women. He seems to be practicing this skills 24h a day. When he is talking to someone, he clearly makes that someone like him, and at he same time,I don't know how, he is sending a subconscious message that conveys that he is 10 times better than the person he is talking with.
Has anyone of you noticed something similar? I'm starting to think that neg-hits and stuff like that aren't even necessary,not even with HBs. It is really a little bit contradicting with what is mostly teached on this site, but in real life I see this guy scoring twice as much as any other player, without even trying.

What your talking about is Charisma. Your friend is developing his charisma. In a recent book on that subject I read that it is the skill of making people feel comfortable in your presence. It's about paying attention to the other person and making them feel good about themselves.

When combined with a confident attitude it is a almost unbeatable force to contend with. Women will fall at the feet of any man who can wield this kind of skill.

 

[ketostix]

Re: Re: C&F vs Charm

Originally posted by MrHarris
What your talking about is Charisma. Your friend is developing his charisma. In a recent book on that subject I read that it is the skill of making people feel comfortable in your presence. It's about paying attention to the other person and making them feel good about themselves.

When combined with a confident attitude it is a almost unbeatable force to contend with. Women will fall at the feet of any man who can wield this kind of skill.

OK, accepting his success, and he appears to be highly successful, is due to charisma...Now how does C&F play into charism and charm? How is C&F going to make the girl feel comfortable in your presence and make other people feel good about themselves?

DJ_Spain: I've come to the conclusion that charm and c&f are complementary.

This is interesting, but I'm not sure how to make C&F charming. The brand DYD proposes doesn't seem to be charming.

I'm not trying to belabor the point, but I have a problem with making C&F not come across as arrogant (insulting?) and charm not seem AFC (supplicating, too complimentary). Anyone have any insight?