Bungo Pony's Superguide on Being Romantic

Bungo Pony

Master Don Juan
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Before I continue to type, there is one thing I must make clear. Romance DOES NOT come before you start dating a girl! Buying flowers or chocolates for a girl that you "like" isn't going to make her love you. It's going to make her think you're a ****ing weirdo stalker. Romance is best left for couples who have been dating for a while.

Another point I must make is that romance is NOT based on how much cash you spend on a girl. Just because you buy her something expensive, it doesn't mean it's romantic. Chances are she could pick up something from a garage sale, and it'll have the same value as what you bought for her.

So now you're asking "Okay smart ass, what the hell is romance?" Romance is an action that is triggered by the thought of her. Romance is also honest, and not thought up by one of your beer drinking friends or a Maxim magazine.

Another point, romance comes best when unexpected, not on some holiday.

Okay, now for some examples!

One thing I hate to do is buy roses for a woman. Roses are WAY overrated, and they stink of cheap love. If you want to buy her flowers, there is nothing wrong with asking her what kind she likes. If she ACTUALLY likes roses, then you can go that route. However I have found that many women are turned off by roses because it reminds them of past relationships. We have their wimpy ex-boyfriends to thank for that one.

If you want to get her flowers, and you don't know what she likes, get her something in her favorite color. When you give them to her (as a surprise), tell her "I was strolling through the mall today, and
when I saw these in the local florist, I immediately thought of you". Awww, she'll melt.

Another piece of romance that I love is to make something for her. However, if you're going to be creative, make sure it's something that you're good at. If you are a painter, paint her something. If you're a poet, write her a poem. If you're a songwriter, write her a song.

Now you're sitting there asking "But Dr. Pony, I'm not talented!" Well buddy, I got news for you. Everyone is talented to some point. If you don't have a video camera, borrow one from one of your buddies and make her a video. Show up one day at her house with the tape you made her under your arms. Tell her that you
rented (or borrowed) a great movie. Cuddle up with her on the couch, and stick it in the machine. She'll love it.

Sometimes, romance comes directly from actions. Here's a cute one, If you have to go to school or work the next day, you're at her house, and she's getting ready for bed, tuck her in. After you tuck her in, look her straight in the eyes and tell her something like "I care so much about you (insert name here). Give her a kiss on the forehead (not the lips) and tell her to have a good sleep.

Well, there's some ideas for you lovey dovey people out there. Remember, doing ANY of this stuff frequently removes the romance aspect from it. Even if she asks you to do one of these things again, don't do it on request! There is no romance when something is expected! It must be unexpected in order for it to be romantic.
 

Lord_Galth

Don Juan
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I agree with you completely. Actually, tactful romance can be an extremely effective tool in anyones game, its a stapple of mine (simply becuase its one tool I actually have a firm grasp on). A number of things you said could be bulleted as the KEYS to good romance:

1) spontaneous (or unexpected). Probably the single best observation you made. You already smothered this one so I'll leave it be

2) not for recently started relationships. I don't start any of the romantic stuff until at least the 2nd or 3rd month, and then its just mildly done. I slowly let myself do more romantic stuff (although its still not COMMON) as more time passes.

3) relate it to her: this, combined with making it something you know you can pull off well, will help you construct endless romantic stuffs. Seriously, don't do stock and standard stuff, and if possible, DO NOT SPEND ANY SIGNIFICANT AMOUNTS OF MONEY. The most romantic stuffs are the ones that are free. This may seem backwards, but just trust me, its true. Too much money and she may feel like you're trying to buy her, and unless she's a gold digger that will be a turn off. If she is a gold digger, dump her.

Anyways, just wanted to add my 2 cents and make certain this stayed near the top.

-LG
 
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