brownbear, week one!

[brownbear.]

hey sosuave, glad to be a new member. i'll start with a 'lil backround on myself, i'm 25, recently returned to the nyc area after a 6-month stint in nepal volunteering/traveling/working/partying.

i stumbled across the site after spending one painful night at my one-itis' house. now we'd been broken up for years and had kind of a will they/won't they thing going on forever. i told myself i was done with her. but i was home alone on a saturday, and she called. normally i wouldn't have answered, but i was bored and felt like chatting. it turns out some mutual friends are over her place that i hadn't seen in a while(i left our hometown when i was 19 and travelled around a bit, she stayed and assimilated all my f#cking friends!)

anyway i get a ride from a friend, walk through the door, and instantly realize i want nothing to do with her. i brushed past her with barely a hello and proceeded to get drunk and ignore her all night. as you DJs already know, this made her sort of, y'know, get all up over my sh!t. but i wasn't playing games, i genuinely want nothing. so i just got more and more pissed until mercifully my friend finally drove me home.

on the way home i changed her name in my phone to "do not answer" and vowed that i was done with all that bullsh!t.(needless to say i've been getting phonecalls/texts from "do not answer" all week, all of which have been ignored)

so later that night, cruising an mma forum, i came across a link to sosuave.com. i had seen the pickup artist show on vh1 before and was already a little curious. now from reading the pickup artist thread, some of you may already consider me a "douchebag", which i can assure you is simply not the case. i'm a decent and fun guy, who just happens to have a little trouble meeting women.

but not anymore.

i read an unbelievable amount of seduction matierial over the next couple of days and noticed the prevalant wisdom on how to get better at meeting women is to simply go up to women and talk to them.

and it turns out that it really is pretty simple, just go up and talk to them, why havent i been doing this all my life!?!?!? just open my f#cking mouth and say something, anything. it seems that once i opened my mouth, the words just kinda flowed on thier own. i did roughly 25-30 cold approaches in the last week, and only a handful of times did i think about what i was going to say to a target before locking eyes, putting on my best sh!t-eating grin and waltzing right over. usually just saying something like; "whats going on over here?" or if she's alone; "what are you doing?""whats up?"

ive been rambling though, i ate some LSD and my mind just seems to be working in circles tonight.a summary of my progres thus far(i'll flush outsome details/highlights later):

pros:

- i've been able to stay out of my head for the most part, as far as approach anxiety goes, i'm the motherf#cking terminator, and somehow remain witty and keep conversation going, it feels very zen

- my state has been untouchable, i've been ignored, and gotten some funny/interesting turns of events come my way, but never let it put me down

-i've actually been having fun, a lot of fun

cons:

- a lot of liquid courage was involved
solution: more dry runs/ semi-dry runs and daygame, maybe week 3/4?

-hesitant to pull trigger. in retrospect, there were a few girls whom i should have asked for numbers/tried to kiss/ and in one case probably could have gotten invited back to her apartment(i'll see her again though). one girl even said she was going to facebook stalk me and i didn't even ask for a number(although i probably never would have called)
solution: study a little more body language, and PAY ATTENTION to the womans actions/reactions in the field, week 2s focus(also, grow a pair)

breakthrough:

i've discovered where my "nice-guyness" comes from. i have three little sisters, whom i care for deeply, which has given me a deep love and respect for women, and also makes me dread the thought of being percieved as a "creep" by anyone really, but especially women. anyway on thanksgiving i was talking to my oldest sister about my monday and wednesday approaching strange women, her reaction; "ugh, i wish you would come down to manhattan and tell more guys to start doing that". so, women WANT to be hit on? in that case i'll happily oblige, it all makes perfect sense. and if someone wants to think i'm "creepy" for doing something that i've been genetically designed to do, thats fine, cuz i'm just brownbear, and i'm attracted to healthy women of breeding age, its something i will never apologize for.

main sticking point:

i've been able to create a fun/flirty vibe with most of my targets, but having trouble transitioning from "cute guy who's fun to flirt with" to "hot guy who's pants i want to suck off". i suspect it is my hesitancy to drop the hammer when the iron is hot, also keeping light kino at light kino.any help in this area would be appreciated

overall:

still some major holes in my game, but i feel like i progressed leaps and bounds this week. the focus was approach every viable woman in my prximity, and thats what i did about 80% of the week. next week, slow it down a little, run tighter technical game, focus more on body language, take no prisoners, show no mercy.

i cant thank all the posters and authors enough, ive found something that has opened my eyes and expanded my horizons. i dont think i've said that since i discovered buddhism almost a decade ago.

morale is high going into week 2, i'll let you know how it goes!

kicking ass and taking names,
brownbear.

 

[Evolve]

Don't know why but I can tell you are going to go far!

Join the Christmas Bootcamp starting this friday.

 

[brownbear.]

thanks bro

although i like the idea of a structured bootcamp to keep me motivated, i've got a kind of free form thing going on, targeting what i specifically need/want to work on. i'm keeping weeks 1 and 2 less result oriented, and focusing more on process.

week ones directive was simple: any attractive woman, any time, approach her. it was pretty solid, i definately wussed out a few times but for the most part i did pretty good. i actually got about 95% positive reactions from women, it was an eye-opening week to say the least.

some highlights:

monday:
- HB blonde 8.67 bartender, rocker chick vibe. i ignored her at first because my two friends were falling all over each-other to try and talk to her, but i kept strong, confident eye-contact and a pleasant smile. i started some fluff talk and light flirting, but got sidetracked(more on that below). she was making active attempts to regain eye-contact. i caught sight of her in the kitchen and strolled right in. i pointed out how trashy she looked with a cig in one hand and a chicken wing in the other, she thought it was pretty funny, i took the cig out of her hand, smoked and returned it, she said:
"you don't have the herps do ya?"
i calmly replied that i did(i don't) and kept eye contact until she took another drag
"and now you do too, chickenwing"
followed by laughter on her part
i asked for her number a little after that, and got shut down, flirting is after all a big part of her job and i may have read the whole thing wrong. at least i kept it light and playful. at the end of the night when she was closing she came up to me, tickled me under the chin and said "so cute", my response:stand there grinning like an idiot, she was a major hottie and my first high-value target. i'll try again in a few weeks, maybe try to bring some hotties in on a night when shes working and completely ignore her.

- tall, slender mulatto HB 6.44, a little boozy, artist/writer type
this is probably the most bizare thing that happened all week. the bar is almost empty, except for me and my friends, chickenwing, and a handful of older dudes. these 2 chicks walk in, sit about halfway down the bar and start eyeball-****ing us,(the friend was a short irish blonde with thighs like a linebacker, a 4.10) the taller one starts mouthing something to me, i dont read lips so i gesture her to come over and say:
"did you just call me an obama mama?"
she found this hilarious and started major kino, tickling and sh!t. i'm thinking to myself "no way did this just fall into my lap" i ask for her number within about 3 minutes, and got rejected, wtf? she looked me up and down and said:
"you wanna take me out?"
me: "you just checked me out."
her: laughed and looked away
me: "look, i know you think i'm really hot, and totally want to go out with me"
her: more laughter and kinda brushed it off
anyway, kino remains high, we play darts with her and her friend, shes calling me baby, grabbing my ass, kissing me on the cheek, its on right?
wrong.
the end of the night comes and we're all walking out, i go to ask her out again, she tells me she's a singer and where she sings on wednesday nights. then the twist:
her: "look, i'm a straight up person"
me: "so what? so am i."
her: "i know, and i like that about you. . ."
me: "but. . .?"
her: "but i'm into your friend."
me: "wtf?!?" in my head: "the guy whos been in the corner playing master buckhunter all night?!? you must be joking."

but she was not joking, as soon as that much was evident, i went to leave and her little troll friend blocked my path harassing me about getting together to play darts or some such nonsense, i brushed her off and disappeared into the night.

now i clearly showed too much interest too soon, although she was the one that opened me, i should've waited til she told me was a singer to ask for the # so i didn't come off as a guy who was just trying to get laid. which is why i was pawned off on the friend.

as far as her swooping in on my friend for the last minute switch, nothing short of mindboggling. i definately felt a switch somewhere in the night, my third friend, D, asked what the deal with obama mama was and i told him it was a lock, he's enough of a hater to possibly have told her. also i worked a 16 hour day and had not showered or changed, my beard and hair were scruffy, and i probably smelled. as far as J is concerned, he has historically bad game, i doubt there was much on his part other than being well groomed. i dunno, whatever the reason, it was out of my hands, and nothing short of hilarious. i feel like i may have gotten my friend laid, if thats the case, awesome! the poor kid NEVER has sh!t like this happen to him. strange turn of events.

 

[brownbear.]

wednesday(night before tnksgiving):

bars were packed went out in my hometown, hit on pretty much every girl i had time to, got locked into a 3 set of my one-itis' friends, built some good attraction with one friend i wanted to f#ck for a while(HB 7.1), but rolled off, i don't need to give the ex an excuse to come back into my life. flirted with some girls that turned out to be my boss' cousins, i will probably see them again.
cold approached a legit HB 9.5, but got blown out quickly. got some good IOIs out of one chick(HB 8.2), suggested we get together sometime, and i notice this wall of a man turning towards me, she introduces her boyfriend, as i go to roll off she grabs the sleeve of my jacket and holds a little extra eye-contact. as i roll off i run almost directly into another chick (HB 7.6), stike up a conversation, shes interested in design like me so we actually have a lot to talk about, just as i ask her to go out sometime i notice some guy staring at the side of my head, of course, another boyfriend, as i roll off another funny sleeve grab/eye-contact thing, almost identical to the last one. another HB 7.2 blonde/grey eyes was holding eyecontact all night, at the end she came up and said she hated me, i was too drunk to react properly and let her get away.

all in all, about 12 cold approaches and attraction built with anothr 4-5 women that i already knew

 

[brownbear.]

friday:

my friends band was playing in manhattan, i was handing out LSD and played the mayor of the club. probably did about 8 or 9 cold approaches. brain allittle too scattered for specifics, but in retrospect, i should've/could've gone home with this cute black chick and her little asian roomate. i had to take the 1:50 train back to westchester, and i suggested that i stay with them til morning, the asian seemed cool with it and the black chick just said "i don't want to stop you", i made a quick decision and ended up on the train. looking back, we were all flying on acid, and if i took charge i probably could have taken them both home for some joint smoking and music listening, maybe even more.

 

[brownbear.]

saturday:

another night tripping on acid in manhattan. only about 4 cold aproaches, feeling a little too jittery. HB 8.6 latina smoking outside a restaurant
me: "are you briana's friend?"
her: "no."
me: "well who's friend are you?"
her: "huh? i dunno"
me: do you wanna be my friend?"
her: jaw dropped "omg, i have a boyfriend" but genuinely flattered
my friends were already halfway down the block so i rolled off

HB blonde 6.8, sitting at the next table over in the bar, keeps turning around and looking at the door
me:"you've got your eyes glued to that door"
her:"oh, whatever"
me:"did you get stoodup by your date or something?"
her: ignored me
me: "you're just going to ignore me?"
her: continue ignoring
burned! its alright, you cant phase me

HB 7.19 dark, brunnette, sort of gypsy style, bouncing up and down to the music
me: "you sure do a lot of dancing for someone sitting down"
her: something, too loud in club to hear
i go back to my friends, they say the club sucks, i say i don't ike it either, but i like her(pointing at the gypsy). she saw me pointing so i walked over, moved all her friends purses coats over and sat down right next to her. i thought this was a little intrusive, but she seemed thrilled that i was talking to her. it turns out she's from tennessee and now lives in brooklyn a few blocks from my sister, and is really cool. she says she is going to facebook stalk me and i roll off.

my friend, sees me confidently walk up to this strange woman and stike up a pleasant conversation, and he asks me: "have you ever seen the pickup artist on vh1?", i reply that yes i had. this started us all on a bout of approaching women backwards, and saying over our shoulders (in the most awkward manner possible)"ive got to get back to my friends in a minute, but i just HAD to know what movie this was from; "nobody puts baby in the corner."" basically chalenging women to call us out. almost every reply was an enthusiastic "Dirty Dancing!". do chicks not watch vh1, or do they not care and are just happy that guys are approaching them(i mean we were stuttering, and using long awkward pauses), odd.

i've been a little sick the past few days, so i haven't gone out, but i'll go out locally tonight. there is a 5.5 that i would like to use as a pivot, she works at a hair salon with a few hotties, but i'm pretty sure she wants me. i'm going to call her in a little bit, any suggestions?

 

[brownbear.]

went out last night, not much to report. i opened every set in the bar(even the fatties) which was only about 5 single girls. all dead ends.

there was this singer/songwriter playing the whole night, i went up to compliment her as i usually do when i enjoyed the music. and BOOM, it turns out she is super-cute, maybe a 7.7, probably an 8.5 a few years ago, i had barely taken notice of her appearance all night. she is flattered and very sweet, i laid on the compliments a little thick, but i really thought she had a beautiful voice. she asked me my name and where i was from right away, i kinda got trapped into interview mode, but got her contact info. out of the 30 or so girls i met this week this was the first one the really stood out, when a girl is talented it just slays me.

week 2 starting out slow, im not going out tonight, but i have a housewarming party to go to tomorrow and a graduation party the night after. rather than sarging the whole party i'l probably pick two or three high value targets from each, and work more on rapport building, kino escalating and isolating. should be fun.

any comments/suggestions/encouragement would be appreciated i kinda jumped both feet into this world and would like to hear from some guys that have been around a while. . .

peace out, you sexy motherf#ckers!!

 

[brownbear.]

meh, not much tonight. my buddies' girlfriend had a housewarming party. exactly 2 single chicks attended, one of which weighed about 245 lbs. the other was a confirmed lesbian(although she asked if she would see me again as i was leaving). i inadvertantly built attraction with 4 different girls who were obviously attatched(i cant help it if your girlfriend wants to chat and you arent paying attention to her) but didn't attempt to take things further. all in all, no progression, morale still high, ready for tomorrow mother f#cker!

 

[Aragon034]

don't worry about slow nights, happens to us all. persistance is the best trait you can have in this sort of thing (and just about anything really)

Go out there and Good Hunting.

 

[brownbear.]

boss' girlfriends graduation party last night:

i had the notion that a lot of my courage in the field over the last 2 weeks was due to alcohol. wrong. i managed to walk in, head held high, smile on my face and introduce myself to evey female in the place(about 12-14).

the demographic was a little older than myself, but some beautiful women. most were attatched at the hip by thier boyfriends, but it was pretty casual and i managed to chat most of them up anyways.

on my way to get a drink i saw this HB 7.82 brunette standing by the drink table talking to some fat motherf#cker(don't get me wrong, cool guy, but jesus man, lose some weight). just as i was walking up we locked eyes, i smiled and she said(to fattie):

"its kind of juvinile, i'm not gonna tell you what it is, but i like it"
me(interupting): "let me guess, you're reading twilight?"
by the look of shock on her face, i was assured that i was right, so i walked past to make a drink. my two older sisters are obsessed with this book and i just took a wild guess, its nice to see a longshot pay off.

she finished up her convo. and turned to me while i was calmly making a drink, she just kind of stood there grinning at me.
me: "so was i right?"
her: "maybe"
me : "i'm right, so are you obsessed with the main vampire like my sister?"
her: "no, i'm more into the werewolf character, because he's kind of an underdog, blah blah blah"
me: (rolls eyes) "did you just call a werewolf the underdog?"
her: lol "yeah i guess i did, you're kinda quick, my friends never pick up on that sh!t" and proceeded to tell me a few awful puns that went over her friends' heads
me: (turning to my co-worker)"shes a huge dork" half whispered, returned by some playful kino on her part

later. . .

she's standing alone looking bored, i try a little bodylanguage/kino experiment, i walk up to her and extend my hand out about 3 inches palm upward and sort of flick my eyes downward at it. she instantly takes my hand and i lead her just a few steps(girls are so receptive to body language, its insane!)

me: "so are you gonna ask me out or what?"
her: "huh?"
me: "well, ive been making all the moves so far, and if we're gonna start this relationship, you've gotta meet me halfway."
her: "um. . . i'm a little suprised" (suprised?!? wtf is that supposed to mean?)
i wait a few seconds and she says nothing, but i hold strong eye contact and she meets it, kinda intense.
me: "alright, i mean i'll ask for your number and set up our first date, just know in the future its gotta be 50/50"
her: "alright. . ." a confused little smirk on her face, so cute.
so i turn my back to her and make a big show of smoothing out my hair and straightening my collar, then turn back and get right into her personal space
me: "hi"
her: "hi" giggling a little
and then i launch into this story about how i had a dream a few years ago about a gorgeous brown eyed curly-haired brunette standing in the rain, but i couldn't quite make out her face, til now. i don't know where it came from, but i was slinging some solid bullsh!t, it ended up kind of meandering and going nowhere(i need to refine this a little more)but it didn't matter, she was hooked. i told her there is a fencing club in her area and that i'm going to take her fencing, she thought it was an awesome idea and basically forced me to take her number!! oh, and when she said that she was suprised, i told her that i never get suprised,til maybe the third date, which she saw as a fun little challenge, and promised to shock me on out first date, which i told her was impossible, can't wait to see what she has in mind.

HB 7.12, a little older but very pretty

i had seen her once before briefly, and told her i was going to try and holler, but she disappeared. she said sorry, and that she wasn't going anywhere tonight. we actually talked for a long time, shes getting ready to open a vegan restaurant, which i think is a great idea. our region is affluent, liberal and very green-freindly(yuppies) and if executed properly, a vegan joint could take off in a big way. so we had a little give and take about ideas for the place and she basically said i was a rockstar and she wants me to manage the joint(which i am highly considering). she used a lot of kino on me and i eventually #-closed, but seeng as how we might eventually end up in a professional relationship, i will not pursue her romanticaly. still, some solid game was ran on my part, if the restaurant thing falls through i'll re-evaluate. she was kinda hyper, which i feel is a good compliment to my personality(rock solid, not easily phased) in a business capacity. if sosuave.com lands me a sick managing gig, and all goes well, i'm buying all new york area DJs dinner!!

after the party i rallied the boys and we hit some bars. i generally sarged the sh!t out of every place we went, my boss was giving me this look, like; "who the f#ck are you?"

met a couple cool chicks, had some fun. i tried to #-close this cute black HB 6.42, she had a boyfriend, but seemed semi-interested and really loved the way i asked for her number;

we had been talking a little while, some rapport was built and she was texting on her phone(it was a 3-set, so not too rude, i was chatting up her friends) so i pull out my phone and looked at her really confused-like.
her: "what?"
me: "i'm trying to figure out what buttons i need to press on this thing(pointing at my phone) to make it start ringing on that end(pointing at hers)"
it got a chuckle, but she dropped the bf-bomb on me, in retrospect, i should've either plowed or switched targets, but lesson learned.

all in all, great week. my game tightened up a lot with the realization that women are unbelievably receptive to even the most subtle body language and eye contact is king.

technically this concludes week 2, but i'm going to stick with the general principles going into week 3, i need to tighten up my body language projection/perception. the goal is to rely less on wit and focus on making encounters with women more overtly/covertly sexual from the get-go. other than a few day 2s and some daygame, week 3 will be pretty simalar to week 2.

awesome intro to the community so far, after reading so much material, and then seeing it in action in the field, i'm inspired to see how far i can go. again, big thanks to all the posters/authors for sharing the sweet info, theories and inspiration.

still kicking ass and taking names(and #s!),
brownbear.

 

[Furyguy]

Awesome **** dude, you are a champ. I want to read more of this, keep posting.

 

[CFERD]

Good job. I had the exact same thing happen with my past oneitis/ex. Literally wanted nothing to do with her. Just talking to her made me want to smack myself for ever going there in the first place....funny how perceptions change given a little time and improvement. I live in your area. Let me know if you want a wingman.

 

[brownbear.]

f#ck yeah bro! forget those hoes