Break Up Etiquette...is there any?

[Some Call Me Tim]

Hey everyone,

Broke up with this girl a while back, a LTR. Basically, we have the same friends, and the friends split their time between us. I don't want to be friends with her, she broke up with me, and I have no desire to be friendly, least of all to please mutual friends.

When they're with her, I steer clear. When I'm with them, she hovers but doesn't really attempt to engage me in conversation.

What is the etiquette here? This a realm I clearly don't understand. Part of me wants to alpha up and move past it, but that's all fake. I feel no desire to be friendly, or even a desire to pretend.

What do?

 

[Bible_Belt]

It's ok to fake it when your emotions are leading you astray. Your inability to be socially polite shows that you still care about her. It's perfectly understandable that you feel that way, but acting upon those emotions gives her the upper hand over you and all your friends.

 

[Jeffst1980]

There's nothing wrong with admitting that you don't want to see her. Seriously--if you have to "fake it" around your friends, they aren't friends at all. Don't worry about trying to appear "alpha" around her, and don't talk to her if you don't want to. As long as you're not throwing tantrums in public, it's ok.

Whatever you do, DON'T agree to be her friend just so that she can feel comfortable.

 

[Some Call Me Tim]

Thanks for the responses guys. She wasn't THE one but she may have been A one for a little while there. As far as doing my own thing goes, I'm all for it, but I'd fallen pretty hard for this girl, (as I said, a LTR) and getting back in the saddle hasn't exactly been easy.

It's getting to the point where at least I feel it's time to transcend this break-up and try to be civil. Not to please people, but to start to re-establish normalcy in my life. No matter how cool I play it, ignoring everybody is not the solution, but rather opening the door to another problem. I suppose what I want to know now is, how do I wrestle / kill these residual feelings for her, knowing that the relationship is very much kaputt?