Being an Alpha Male - how to handle sh1t?

[TheFlyingMan]

This might seem like another stupid Q from an RAFC, but how would an Alpha Male handle sh1t?

2 scenarios, 1 that just happened to me, and another that is hypothetical:

1) I run a web design biz, and recently had a potential client call me up. He managed to smooth talk me, acting all friendly, into giving him some drafts done for free. I drafted his website, about a day's work, and emailed them to him. No reply. A few days later I emailed again, no reply. Then I called him. He had changed into a total arsehole instead of the friendly guy I had been talking to. He spoke like I just raped his wife or something. He abused me saying that the work I had done was total sh1t and he was too busy and he hung up on me.

I thought about calling back and abusing him back but decided to try and be more diplomatic. I emailed him again saying "if you didn't like the work, tell me, no reason to ignore me, at the very least just say you've got it." He replied a one word email "I have got it.". I let it go at that but it pissed me off like hell. How would an alpha male handle it? Wouldn't it be immature to fly off the handle?

A more experienced business man told me that the smart thing to do was just go on and not let it affect you, don't try and get back at him etc. That might be good for business, but was it alpha?

2) Let's say some drunk ****head with all his friends are picking on you at a bar to impress his woman. Starting a fight or arguing will get your head kicked in, as he's got 5 boys with him and you're alone. What's the alpha thing to do?

Important:
I might be wrong, I notice the mature thing to do is not always what causes the most attraction in a woman. As a martial artist, I have very realistic views on violence. In scenario 2, I know that I would have to grit my teeth and find a way to walk out of that bar, I'm not going to go to hospital or the morgue over pride / impressing a woman or some sh1t. If they were in the middle of raping my girlfriend or something, I'm picking up weapons and charging in, but anything less I'm walking away.

But a woman watching that might think that I'm a wuss?

 

[backbreaker]

Here's my thing... and this is honestly how I think.. you can talk all you want. He isn't going to lay a hand on me. That's what's NOT going to happen. So we can nip this tough guy **** in the ass right now. And I will let someone know, in so many words of course, that that's a line you just aren't going to cross with me. I went to go look at a car about a month ago and the salesman was talking to me like I was a child because I was on the phone while I was on the demo drive and not listening to him.. i turned to him, and he was bigger than me, and asked him did he have a damn problem? When he said no, I said that's what I thought.. you can talk to me like a kid, I can make you look stupid.. I wish he would have hit me, I would have sued the **** out of that company and kicked him in the nuts.

The ALPHA thing to do is the smart thing to do. I am good with words, and I can get out of most situtations. If I CAN'T, and my dad tought me this.. take one guy, just one of the 5, and beat the living crap out of him. Yes the rest are going to get you, but hold on to that one guy for dear life and let him have it. It's all you can do but you should never be in that situation, espically over some women, and espically over some you don't know. **** let them have them, in the end they will come back to you anyway.

 

[22proto]

IMO if it was ever in a bar or a club, i would probably walk away. but if **** just had to come down, id probably mouth off let the SOB walk up and id suprise him by macing him in the face.

elsewise just try to avoid going out solo.

 

[Mr_knowit_all]

IMO if it was ever in a bar or a club, i would probably walk away. but if **** just had to come down, id probably mouth off let the SOB walk up and id suprise him by macing him in the face.

elsewise just try to avoid going out solo.

"Macing" someone sounds kind of gay. Effective, but gay.

 

[JC9]

For #1, let it go. Yelling at the guy or harrasing him does neither you or your business any good. If he calls back later wanting the work done, turn him down. In the future don't give away work for free, establish a lower fee for draft type work to avoid this situation. In business, if someone can get something for free they will, so protect yourself by always getting some return on your work product.

For #2, I'd say hold your ground and give as good as you get verbally. However, remain completely uneffected emotionally. Imagine how it looks to everyone else if you have some guy in a rage trying to insult you, and you give it right back to him while remaining relaxed with a grin on your face. Sure you may get your ass kicked, but such is life and most people are pussies at heart and they'll likely just go away in a huff.

That happened to me a couple of times in college, I can't remember the exact wording, but some guy got all pissy and said 'You want to fight?' or something similar and i said 'Sure' and he just got frustrated and walked away.

 

[Socialreject]

Business is not the same as social life imho...

In business you always got to keep your head and do whatever is best for your business, whatever the consequences and sometimes that means putting on a face or taking some crap because that will land you the dow.

Business is a race for cash, the winners are the ones with the cash. So whatever you do, land the cash!

Social life is different, there you can let your pride talk for you a little more and it's ok to act "immature". Often times what people consider mature is the same thing that puts you at home later that night in your sofa still going over something in your head and thinking "argh why did i let him/her get away with that?!". Whatever you do, always stay true to yourself. The worst pain is damage done to your self esteem, so don't ever let anyone put you in a situation that's happening at the cost of your self esteem.

Sometimes that puts you in the way of physical abuse, it happens. There are ways to deal with that two. Just remember, don't put YOURSELF in the way of physical abuse. You don't have to let anyone walk all over you, just tell them how you feel, tell them what you think. If they take it further than just words then that's their decision, their problem... they are the ones who went caveman on you, not the other way around.

The point you want to get across more or less is that you are a civilised, decent man, but that fact doesn't mean in any way that you are going to put up with any crap and that if it comes to that, you are willing to face em in whatever way they wanna take it.

Guys who pick fights and get into them all the time are really just losers. That's not why you go out, you go out to have fun! If you are a confident man you don't need all that crap to hold your own.

 

[Big Eee Zee]

id get a 700,000 volt tazer. they're only 70 bux at bladerealms. and my guess is he wont be getting back up for a while.

 

[flexion_]

1) Well this situation was a stupid business move on your part. Never give away your services for free - it devalues you. Obviously you aren't going to be making a sale because the client thinks your work is crap and has no value because you gave away something for free. Move on and learn from it for the next time.

2) Nothing. Walk away. Its just some drunk insecure dude - who cares? I'd just have a good laugh with his other 4 friends.

 

[crumpiteer]

This might seem like another stupid Q from an RAFC, but how would an Alpha Male handle sh1t?

2 scenarios, 1 that just happened to me, and another that is hypothetical:

1) I run a web design biz, and recently had a potential client call me up. He managed to smooth talk me, acting all friendly, into giving him some drafts done for free. I drafted his website, about a day's work, and emailed them to him. No reply. A few days later I emailed again, no reply. Then I called him. He had changed into a total arsehole instead of the friendly guy I had been talking to. He spoke like I just raped his wife or something. He abused me saying that the work I had done was total sh1t and he was too busy and he hung up on me.

I thought about calling back and abusing him back but decided to try and be more diplomatic. I emailed him again saying "if you didn't like the work, tell me, no reason to ignore me, at the very least just say you've got it." He replied a one word email "I have got it.". I let it go at that but it pissed me off like hell. How would an alpha male handle it? Wouldn't it be immature to fly off the handle?

A more experienced business man told me that the smart thing to do was just go on and not let it affect you, don't try and get back at him etc. That might be good for business, but was it alpha?

2) Let's say some drunk ****head with all his friends are picking on you at a bar to impress his woman. Starting a fight or arguing will get your head kicked in, as he's got 5 boys with him and you're alone. What's the alpha thing to do?

Important:
I might be wrong, I notice the mature thing to do is not always what causes the most attraction in a woman. As a martial artist, I have very realistic views on violence. In scenario 2, I know that I would have to grit my teeth and find a way to walk out of that bar, I'm not going to go to hospital or the morgue over pride / impressing a woman or some sh1t. If they were in the middle of raping my girlfriend or something, I'm picking up weapons and charging in, but anything less I'm walking away.

But a woman watching that might think that I'm a wuss?

You did the Alpha thing, don't worry... Well done.

walking out is the sensible thing to do, nothing wussy about it.

 

[milrenkb]

This might seem like another stupid Q from an RAFC, but how would an Alpha Male handle sh1t?

2 scenarios, 1 that just happened to me, and another that is hypothetical:

1) I run a web design biz, and recently had a potential client call me up. He managed to smooth talk me, acting all friendly, into giving him some drafts done for free. I drafted his website, about a day's work, and emailed them to him. No reply. A few days later I emailed again, no reply. Then I called him. He had changed into a total arsehole instead of the friendly guy I had been talking to. He spoke like I just raped his wife or something. He abused me saying that the work I had done was total sh1t and he was too busy and he hung up on me.

I thought about calling back and abusing him back but decided to try and be more diplomatic. I emailed him again saying "if you didn't like the work, tell me, no reason to ignore me, at the very least just say you've got it." He replied a one word email "I have got it.". I let it go at that but it pissed me off like hell. How would an alpha male handle it? Wouldn't it be immature to fly off the handle?

A more experienced business man told me that the smart thing to do was just go on and not let it affect you, don't try and get back at him etc. That might be good for business, but was it alpha?

2) Let's say some drunk ****head with all his friends are picking on you at a bar to impress his woman. Starting a fight or arguing will get your head kicked in, as he's got 5 boys with him and you're alone. What's the alpha thing to do?

Important:
I might be wrong, I notice the mature thing to do is not always what causes the most attraction in a woman. As a martial artist, I have very realistic views on violence. In scenario 2, I know that I would have to grit my teeth and find a way to walk out of that bar, I'm not going to go to hospital or the morgue over pride / impressing a woman or some sh1t. If they were in the middle of raping my girlfriend or something, I'm picking up weapons and charging in, but anything less I'm walking away.

But a woman watching that might think that I'm a wuss?

Clearly an example of someone who gets it. Look you've already got the correct answers to your questions. I say you can trust yourself more. Stick to what your learning in both your alpha male and martial arts training and you'll be fine.

Remember
A man who stands for nothing will fall for anything

 

[speedo_meme]

Walk away from 5 guys man, definitely. But if you have to do something, use a weapon, or get one good hard lick in on the closest one and then run the fukk out of there. Don't think, react.

 

[TheFlyingMan]

Cheers for the encouragement guys!

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

I hate to be Captain obvious, but an Alpha male wouldn't be asking these questions. He'd instinctively know the answer.

#1 - Always request a deposit for any work your doing. If they're interested in your service, get the details on what they want from you and then quote them an estimate of what it'll cost. Make the deposit 50% of the quote, to be paid upfront. If they don't want to pay up an advance, walk away.

#2 - 5 on 1 is not a fight. It's a beating. If you can walk away, do it... if there's no chance, do as Backbreaker says and pick one guy and beat the snot out of him. 5 on 1, I'd say there's no rules on your end. Fight dirty, if you have too. I'd be ashamed to be in a group of 5 guys and start crap with one guy. What man does this? only the wussies. For me, it's 1 on 1 or nothing.

 

[TheFlyingMan]

well i never said i was an alpha male, I'm training to be one, that's why I asked...

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

well i never said i was an alpha male, I'm training to be one, that's why I asked...

Yeah, I understand.

I find one thing that many guys who are "trying" to be alpha do wrong is that they spend way too much time dwelling on what IS or ISN'T alpha that they totally ignore their gut feeling, which is what they should be following, in the first place. The primal instinct will guide you, if you stop a second to listen to it.

Same goes for guys getting played by women... if they would just listen to their gut instead of ignoring it... many would be alot better off and never have eneded up on a site like this.

 

[TheFlyingMan]

Yeah, I understand.

I find one thing that many guys who are "trying" to be alpha do wrong is that they spend way too much time dwelling on what IS or ISN'T alpha that they totally ignore their gut feeling, which is what they should be following, in the first place. The primal instinct will guide you, if you stop a second to listen to it.

Same goes for guys getting played by women... if they would just listen to their gut instead of ignoring it... many would be alot better off and never have eneded up on a site like this.

Agreed totally. THe right thing to do is not always the best feeling thing to do. with #1 I wanted to hunt the fvcker down but I remained polite but pissed off as hell. Ah well.