Being Alone Thru This Break Up Is Weakening Me

[georgie24]

of course she has 20 guys behind her, the girlfriends are back to drag her out to the club scene, showered with compnay, as i sit here home alone on a saturday without a clue what do do with myself or get into a routine.

To make matters more complicated my family love her.

I need to get away and detox from all this, everyday i learn something new about my sister, cousins, some close friends ( all women ) that i hurt my exand drove her away because of my actions/behavior.

FAMILY CANT NOT BE TRUSTED WHEN YOU NEED THEM AS THEY PLAY BOTH SIDES OF THE FENCE !

 

[zekko]

of course she has 20 guys behind her, the girlfriends are back to drag her out to the club scene, showered with compnay, as i sit here home alone on a saturday without a clue what do do with myself or get into a routine.

This is why women tend to get over breakups more easily than men. They are generally more social so they end up very large support systems to get them through the tough part. Guys are more likely to be independent and often have to go it alone. Keep your chin up.

To make matters more complicated my family love her.

And meanwhile she has probably poisoned her family against you with lies about how horrible you are. I've been there. Sounds like she also was running you down to your family too though, that's not cool.

It's painful, but just be glad she's gone. Know that your future is not an open book of endless possibilities. Good luck. When the going gets tough, the tough get going, and all that.

 

[runner83]

Tough that she has put your family against you as well.

Women's strength is talking and networking.

The strength of men is action and achieving goals.

You need to work out what your goals in life are, and go achieve them.

No great man has ever been remembered because of his woman, but because of what he DID!

Good luck.

 

[Falcon25]

There is no such thing as a break up for a woman. It's called "a couple hours of being single". They have em lined up anytime they want. All they have to do is go outside. Anyone who doesn't believe this, should sign off right now, and never come back.

 

[georgie24]

There is no such thing as a break up for a woman. It's called "a couple hours of being single". They have em lined up anytime they want. All they have to do is go outside. Anyone who doesn't believe this, should sign off right now, and never come back.

agreed

all she has to do is go out and BAM, pampered in company and welcoming, esp if she is gorgous that other women worship her. So shes flying high and im here stuck

 

[runner83]

Man the fvck up

agreed

all she has to do is go out and BAM, pampered in company and welcoming, esp if she is gorgous that other women worship her. So shes flying high and im here stuck

You expect sympathy?..?

You started this pissing and moaning contest, now it's up to YOU to finish it.

Girls have options? Bam, newsflash! NOT!

Who gives a fvck?

It's obvious from your posts that you placed way too much of your happiness on that girl...and where did that leave you?

You sacrificed your own self-growth to be with her, and now you're nothing but a bitter and twisted shell of a man.

Girls will leave a guy in a flash if she finds a BBD (bigger better deal) without a trace of guilt. And why should they?

You must always protect your heart, and remember that whoever cares least controls the relationship (see Rollo Tomassi).

For god's sake, get yourself together and get back out there.

 

[georgie24]

You expect sympathy?..?

You started this pissing and moaning contest, now it's up to YOU to finish it.

Girls have options? Bam, newsflash! NOT!

Who gives a fvck?

It's obvious from your posts that you placed way too much of your happiness on that girl...and where did that leave you?

You sacrificed your own self-growth to be with her, and now you're nothing but a bitter and twisted shell of a man.

Girls will leave a guy in a flash if she finds a BBD (bigger better deal) without a trace of guilt. And why should they?

You must always protect your heart, and remember that whoever cares least controls the relationship (see Rollo Tomassi).

For god's sake, get yourself together and get back out there.

guilty as charged, i invested more then i should have in her:kick:

im here to learn

 

[georgie24]

i let my family guilt me into " not " caring about her...thats were i fukced up ...umungst other areas

 

[typical]

All I can say is anyone can have a woman, relationship, marriage but really is that all to their life ???

(this will go off on a tangent)

Think about it most people in the world wake up go to school/work and then go back home and live with their gf's or wifes, its rinse repeat every day. Same boring crap living for others (as in for the wife family kids friends etc).

No great man in history ever achieved anything without self sacrifice, I made my mind up a long long time ago that I will not be another name that just vanish's into this planets history books I want to be remembered for something great and fantastic.

Every Man on this website has that chance, they just have to take it.

So what I'm saying is to learn from your previous mistakes and move ahead full steam, in 5 to 10 years time the changes will shock you, as I know they are shocking me in a very good way.

 

[Jitterbug]

Stop being sad and be awesome instead.

What else have you got going in your life? Surely there has to be things you really care about?

 

[Slickster]

agreed

all she has to do is go out and BAM, pampered in company and welcoming, esp if she is gorgous that other women worship her. So shes flying high and im here stuck

Don't be a chump man.

The solution to your problem is exactly what she is doing right now.

Get out there and get yours.

 

[Johnnyventana]

Georgie24, isn't this the BPD chick you were talking about?

You are in denial right now. Blaming yourself for a failed cluster b relationship. That somehow could could have tried harder, bla bla. Don't forget, the real fkd up part, is that the harder you try, the less she cares and respects you. A no win situation if there ever was one.

Tell your family to eat it. Maybe you need to explain to them the bad shyte she did do you.

Either way, sure your ex will find someone quickly, but she will do the exact same thing to him as she did to you. No doubt about that. She's not going to all of a sudden not be mentally ill.

 

[Julius_Seizeher]

Instead of letting it weaken you, why not let it make you stronger?

 

[MonkeyButt]

Make a list...

I've answered another of your posts as I was in a similar predicament.
The exception, is my family completely broke contact with her regardless of their fondness of her projected reflection! Blood should be thicker than water.

After the initial "woe is me", "what's happened to my life", "what was it I used to like about life anyway?" despair, I started taking action to rebuild it (regardless if I was in the mood to do so or not).

Make a list of your goals over the next year.
Try to fill up at least 5 days per week of your life with activities (you don't have to find them interesting, just get yourself around people).
Try not to look at women until you are no longer comparing them to your ex, you've been brainwashed, nobody will compare!

Make yourself follow through with everything!
Never, never blow anything off due to being sad.

You'll be amazed at how quickly you start to pull away from your depression and despair.

Meds can help. They will help you to avoid the major depression disorder that could set in. Talk to your doctor about an SSRI type drug. It can reeeealy help. Beware though, if you work a creative type job, they can shave off your edge that makes you good at it.

It took me a little less than a year to rid myself of the resentment and self pity after a 14 year marriage to a cluster b psycho-hose-beast woman.
In the end, it was her with the depression and my pity was for her and not myself (not that I ever let her know!!!).

Also, remember, the best way to get even with these types of women are to move on and always appear to be doing great. Makes them nuts, and makes you happy at the same time.

Chin up,

MB

 

[squirrels]

Instead of letting it weaken you, why not let it make you stronger?

It IS making him stronger. He just hasn't accepted that fact yet. He thinks he's getting weaker because he "hurts".

As the old Marine Corps T-shirt says, "Pain is Weakness Leaving the Body". Consider yourself fortunate that life has blessed you with this lesson in humility and perseverence...it will serve you well later in life when something IMPORTANT challenges your resolve. (romance does not qualify as 'important')

Hang in there, sport.

 

[georgie24]

It IS making him stronger. He just hasn't accepted that fact yet. He thinks he's getting weaker because he "hurts".

As the old Marine Corps T-shirt says, "Pain is Weakness Leaving the Body". Consider yourself fortunate that life has blessed you with this lesson in humility and perseverence...it will serve you well later in life when something IMPORTANT challenges your resolve. (romance does not qualify as 'important')

Hang in there, sport.

thank you , im setting sails northbound while as i rebuild.

 

[Paintballguy]

Channel that anger and negative energy into something positive. For example, when I went through a breakup with my ex, I started going to the gym again and lifting weights. I went from 5'10" 210lbs of fat to 165lbs lean and strong right now and it has been like 5 months. Also, I have dated 5 chicks since breaking up with my ex.

You have a great opportunity to better yourself. Take it and run with it.

 

[HalfAddict]

Hit the gym, raise that testosterone and you will get over it.