Being accused several times in office because of chick competition

[BornWinner]

This is my current problem now.!

There is this guy in office who always seem to compete with me in whatever I do. Doesn't matter if it is work, social life and etc and the worst is when it comes to women.

He seemed to be engaging in a competition with me in the workplace by trying to pickup the women that I am Djing! In short, we're like somehow enemies. I feel that he is jealous because I am able to get along with some of the women here.

So it happened yesterday when he lost his belonging and he started to accuse me for stealing the money in his wallet which he has left in his drawer.(He didn't lock his drawer btw.! And he claimed to have forgotten to lock it when he was out for lunch). So why blamed me for stealing? He could have taken his own money out and forgot if he has taken it. It was his mistake to forget to lock his drawer so anyone in the office could have been the culprit in any case if someone really steals.

Does it seem like he is trying to be a troublemaker here because I am a new guy and he wanna compete with me in whatever I do.
The reason he gave when accusing me was "He is a new guy here. Before he was here, there wasn't any case like lost belonging reported in the office. So he is the culprit"

What a bloody B@stard he is!!!!! How dare he accused me for something I didn't do?!

 

[Don of Truth]

Take care of the situation

Ask him out to lunch. Pay for lunch too.
During lunch have a mano-a-mano conversation with him. You don't want to tell him off. Try to find out why he is being like that. Most likely he has issues. See if you can help him.

Here you could take the opportunity to make him into an asset.

If he turns down lunch then tell him you need to speak with him in private.

Whatever you do , don't air the dirty laundry.

 

[squirrels]

Did you take his money?

If so, you're a d!ck. Give it back.

If not, then just tell him, "Sorry man, I didn't take your money. You have the wrong guy."

If he keeps on it, tell him firmly that you did NOT take his money and if he keeps harassing you about it that you're going to take it up with management/personnel/whoever.

He has no right to continue making accusations wtihout evidence that ruin your reputation in the workplace. And I suggest you make him aware of this.

But you have nothing to worry about if you didn't take the money.

 

[wolfie]

Just tell him you're going to take it up with management right now. He'll get scared and back off.
if you want, go to the manager anyway, he'll be humiliated at making false accusations, and the rest of the crap he does to compete with you might come out as well (the manager will have to deal with that kind of workplace conflict if it threatens to disrupt the environment)

 

[Ice Cold]

Originally posted by wolfie
go to the manager anyway, he'll be humiliated at making false accusations, and the rest of the crap he does to compete with you might come out as well (the manager will have to deal with that kind of workplace conflict if it threatens to disrupt the environment)

That's what I would do.

Demand that he apoligises for his accusations in public. From what you've said, you present a threat to him because you're just better. He's jelous. That's the way it is.

You can't betray him, he'll want to destroy you anyways. The only way to calm him down is to show him that he's better than you. And it's a hard thing to do.

Take it to the management. You're being harassed. It's against the law.

 

[Ice Cold]

BTW: It should be an official complaint. A written notice, explaining the situation, listing the dates and descriptions of particular instances of harassment.

Save a copy of this letter to yourself.

By submitting this letter, the management/company is forced to take action. If they don't act, you can sue them for big bucks.

Cheers.

 

[BornWinner]

I think that's his intention

What Im afraid is that he will continue to accuse me in future if anything else is reported missing. In other words, he is trying to look for trouble with me and make my life miserable in the workplace. What can be done if I take this matter up to the management?

The most that can be done is they will tell him to investigate properly if he has taken the money earlier and forgotten about it. He may denied that he has bad memory and continue to harass me. ARGH.........he is somehow indirectly forcing me to quit my job but I can't do that!

 

[squirrels]

Re: I think that's his intention

Originally posted by BornWinner
What Im afraid is that he will continue to accuse me in future if anything else is reported missing. In other words, he is trying to look for trouble with me and make my life miserable in the workplace. What can be done if I take this matter up to the management?

The most that can be done is they will tell him to investigate properly if he has taken the money earlier and forgotten about it. He may denied that he has bad memory and continue to harass me. ARGH.........he is somehow indirectly forcing me to quit my job but I can't do that!

Either file a grievance (preferred if you want to keep your job) or kick his ass. Stop being a pu$$y over it and do SOMETHING. And not some petty behind-the-back revenge like you fantasize about.

 

[Ice Cold]

Re: I think that's his intention

Originally posted by BornWinner What Im afraid is that he will continue to accuse me in future if anything else is reported missing.

If you're not caught, you're not the thief.

He can accuse you all you want.

In other words, he is trying to look for trouble with me and make my life miserable in the workplace.

It's against the law about friendly workplace environment and harassment.

What can be done if I take this matter up to the management?

I am assuming you're living in the US/Canada.

It is against the law to allow workers harass each other. Be it sexual, physical or emotional. This responsibility rests on the management. As soon as they receive a complaint, their management's ass is on the line. Also the company's money and reputation is on the line.

Therefore the manager is forced to take action and resolve the issue at hand. Usually they will see both of you separately and ask lots of related questions. They will give the guy a warning not to do it again.

If he doesn't stop, you should document his harassing and present it to the management again. Most likely, he'll get fired.

If the management allows this stuff to continue, you probably have a case.

Cheers

 

[Life-Trainee]

Talk to him seriously about it first. If he persists file a complaint.

 

[wolfie]

once you humiliate him and get him reprimanded by exposing his false accusations to management, he's not going to do it again - otherwise he'd get fired. You can even take him to court.