One thing that i noticed over the summer while in the field and posting was a lot of guys arent people of value, simply valuetakers.
What do i mean by valuetakers? This are people who when in the field or set arent giving value but taking it away from the group. I'll explain further. When you build value, you do it through storytelling, dhv, social proof etc. This is momentarily value though. Value that you give to the group to be accepted into the group for the moment.
You see there is a difference between value for 5 minutes and value for life. When you have value you are someone people want to be around. You have value for life, when you give value to others. Example
Your wing comes out of a set, that he dont do so good in. Instead of immediately bashing or criziting him, you tell him how good he did to open that set and all the good things he did. You give him value. Cause everyone wants to feel accepted and appreciated.
If when you neg a girl, that is just set up when you give her value later in qualifying stage. Ok examples
If you walk up to a hot girl and say "you are so beatuiful". WHat does that do for her? NOTHING. She has heard that forever.
OK now when you neg her a little then later on you find out she plays the piano and you tell how awesome you think that is and that she just earn major points in your book.
That there gives her value.
Because she saw you gave her a complient on something other than the obvious. You took time to find something about her thats different and you let her know you respect her for that. Respect=VALUE.
To help you understand the difference further between valuetakers and a person of value, momentarily value and value for life. An amog who amogs every guy (i.e. teases them makes them look beta) gains value for that moment.
He has shown he has more value than that other guy. Great but if he doesnt give value to the girl i.e. all he does is bust on her and makes her feel bad and everyone around him feel bad. He loses value.
WHY?
Because who the hell wants to be around someone who makes you feel like sh*t.
The way you give value to a girl through what would be considered a compliment is by doing it without expecting anything in return for it. Not even a thank you. That is why a natural can open with a compliment and get away with it. use this to your advantage, especially when you have no option but to go direct.
Key: Never be reaction seeking.
People who are reaction seeking could tell all the great stories they want but after it all done and said you are just seen as a valuetaker.
Give value. That is the only way to not be seen as a valuetaker. ANd more importantly as a person of value.
Guys who are jerks and still get girls have some value to give but usually this is momentarily value and rarely do that date the hottest girls like in movies. Guys who are just jerks with no real value usually have value from being a star athlete or something along those lines.
*This is not to say all star athletes are jerks.*
Use this information to your advantage and start being a person of value. Give that homeless guy change. Hold the door for that guy/girl whoever. Tell the little girl how nice her dress is.
SO the overrall view.
- Value comes many things = stories, dhvs, money, social proof etc.
- But thats just momentary
- True value is all about who you are as a person.
- Be someone who's good to other people
- Become more positive, this makes you feel better about yourself and about everything
So make this happen and become a person of true value.
Love,
Marvel
What do i mean by valuetakers? This are people who when in the field or set arent giving value but taking it away from the group. I'll explain further. When you build value, you do it through storytelling, dhv, social proof etc. This is momentarily value though. Value that you give to the group to be accepted into the group for the moment.
You see there is a difference between value for 5 minutes and value for life. When you have value you are someone people want to be around. You have value for life, when you give value to others. Example
Your wing comes out of a set, that he dont do so good in. Instead of immediately bashing or criziting him, you tell him how good he did to open that set and all the good things he did. You give him value. Cause everyone wants to feel accepted and appreciated.
If when you neg a girl, that is just set up when you give her value later in qualifying stage. Ok examples
If you walk up to a hot girl and say "you are so beatuiful". WHat does that do for her? NOTHING. She has heard that forever.
OK now when you neg her a little then later on you find out she plays the piano and you tell how awesome you think that is and that she just earn major points in your book.
That there gives her value.
Because she saw you gave her a complient on something other than the obvious. You took time to find something about her thats different and you let her know you respect her for that. Respect=VALUE.
To help you understand the difference further between valuetakers and a person of value, momentarily value and value for life. An amog who amogs every guy (i.e. teases them makes them look beta) gains value for that moment.
He has shown he has more value than that other guy. Great but if he doesnt give value to the girl i.e. all he does is bust on her and makes her feel bad and everyone around him feel bad. He loses value.
WHY?
Because who the hell wants to be around someone who makes you feel like sh*t.
The way you give value to a girl through what would be considered a compliment is by doing it without expecting anything in return for it. Not even a thank you. That is why a natural can open with a compliment and get away with it. use this to your advantage, especially when you have no option but to go direct.
Key: Never be reaction seeking.
People who are reaction seeking could tell all the great stories they want but after it all done and said you are just seen as a valuetaker.
Give value. That is the only way to not be seen as a valuetaker. ANd more importantly as a person of value.
Guys who are jerks and still get girls have some value to give but usually this is momentarily value and rarely do that date the hottest girls like in movies. Guys who are just jerks with no real value usually have value from being a star athlete or something along those lines.
*This is not to say all star athletes are jerks.*
Use this information to your advantage and start being a person of value. Give that homeless guy change. Hold the door for that guy/girl whoever. Tell the little girl how nice her dress is.
SO the overrall view.
- Value comes many things = stories, dhvs, money, social proof etc.
- But thats just momentary
- True value is all about who you are as a person.
- Be someone who's good to other people
- Become more positive, this makes you feel better about yourself and about everything
So make this happen and become a person of true value.
Love,
Marvel
. I love examples. I like how you explained, and then showed with an example.