Be extravert

[I-am-someone]

Being fun!

I've been looking around on these boards for quite some time now and have come to the conclusion that the information on these boards is great. However, I do still see a great problem with the majority of the people that are actually sticking to this board because they feel they still "need help".
Every single one of you is introverted. The outside world literally has to work to get emotions and actions out of you.
Seeing as I have found a solution for this problem that has been working quite well for me, I'm going to share it with you.

Be extravert.
Don't give a damn what other people think. You are who you are, you have to offer what you have to offer, people that don't like that aren't important, your fun is important.
Just go around,
yelling and screaming at people,
make people feel,
dance with people,
hug people,
kiss people,
lift them up in the air,
dance with people,
make people feel good about themselves,
run around singing as loud as you can because you feel like it,
go up to a girl, look at her and start laughing because you think it's too funny that she's taking herself this seriously.

Inevitably, you will walk around with a big smile on your face all day, because you are doing what YOU want to do.

There isn't a simple way I can describe this to the people on here, but just run around not giving a damn what people think of you and you will become addicted to it. In the end, people will love you for acting like that as long as you are still a good person in your heart.

As a matter of fact, acting like this has been the main strength of my DJ'ing. Being introvert makes people ignore me, dislike me, look down on me. Being extravert makes people look at me with respect, makes all the girls come flocking to me wondering who I am, asking me stuff about myself and giving me total control over them as I wish. People love being around someone who is fun. Being extravert is being fun, being introvert is being boring.


This is also extended into other pieces of advice given on these boards as well as real life.

• Be yourself.
  People don't mean "Be yourself and be introvert", they mean "Be yourself and show who you are to the whole damn world!"
• You are the prize.
  Yes, you are the prize. You are being fun, you are doing whatever you want to do. This is what I call "being the prize".
• Be a man.
  You are running around, doing whatever you feel like doing. If you are a man, being extravert just makes people realize it all the more, not only making you a man but showing it to the world as well!
• Be happy.
  Oh my god, doing this will make the hormones rush through your body like you have never experienced before. It's the greatest possible feeling you can have, that feeling IS happiness itself to me.

So, everybody on here, try this out at least once. If this doesn't work for you, something is wrong with you

I actually believe that if I act like this while having crappy clothes on and while wearing my glasses, I can still get girls to come running to me . I'm not about to test it out yet though, because I'm having too much fun doing it the way I am doing it right now .

Ofcourse, you can't always be extravert, it's just too draining on your body, so at times you need to calm down and get back to your normal self. I personally keep this kind of behaviour reserved for going out, or for having fun with friends.
Don't drink too much alcohol, as it can either totally destroy the vibe or make the vibe go horribly out of control. Don't smoke weed, as it is guaranteed to destroy the hapiness.

 

[dearsappho]

So the concept of women being drawn to mystery and ambiguity is defunct then right?

 

[lbfan1638]

what hes saying is that you should do what you want...if you want to be "mysterious" and "ambiguous", then by all means do it...however, if you're just doing it to pick up chicks and not because you really give a **** about it, then u aren't being true to yourself...anyway i love this post because its true...in high school, i was the biggest introvert...now in college, i decided to be extraverted and now a day doesn't go by that I don't have someone to hang out with or something to do and I still have an easy time attracting girls without that mysterious and ambiguous bull****...whatever works for you though...great post...

 

[dearsappho]

Fair point, but in my experience the type of person he describes in his post can be overly annoying.
The part about doing what you want to do when you want rings true, but yelling and screaming at people? please...

 

[lbfan1638]

haha

yeah i agree with you there...do anything you want WITHIN REASON lol...you have to show some restraint in your actions because u might end up arrested or something lol...btw i wasnt trying to attack you or anything, just in case u took it that way...anyway, i still think the post is great

 

[I-am-someone]

Thanx, lbfan

Actually, the yelling and screaming is indeed way over the top but I'm just trying to get a point across to you guys. Yelling and screaming is allowed, as long as it's fun to do so .
As for being annoying to some people, I have gotten way past that. If someone tells me that I'm making them tired because I'm so active and extravert, I just tell them that I'm making them tired because they're sitting on their lazy ass and when they see me they suddenly realize that they're not doing anything, if they don't wanna feel tired, they should join in on the fun! If they like feeling tired, they should do so by all means, just as long as they're not gonna tell me not to have fun!

 

[I-am-someone]

Remember, guys, you should know that people like it when somebody acts like this.

Just think of it like having a humongous sign on your forehead saying "I am fun!".
Wouldn't you want to be around someone who is fun? I have discovered that people literally flock around you to see what you're doing if you are being extravert.

By extravert I do NOT mean herassing people though, I mean making people laugh and just playing around with people. There is a great difference between the two.

Come to think of it, this thread shouldn't really be named "Be extravert", it should be named "How to be fun". This attitude is what fun is all about. You can have it in a mild sense or you can have it in an extreme sense, but the more you have it the more fun you are to the people around you. Just do whatever you feel like doing to have fun, just as you did when you were still a little kid.

 

[dearsappho]

Haha..sounds like you were getting carried away just writing this post, fella....I like it!

 

[ScrewIt]

I think the main point of this post is being unique and speak your mind

 

[Mason]

In other words. Be comfortable in your own skin and don't try to gain other peoples approval. You are the one whom others seek approval from. Whether they're hb10's or anyone.. don't let your emotions be tied to they're reaction.. your a cause in the world and not an effect.. Love it..

 

[disciple]

Just express yourself and don't be inhibited.

Follow your passions and dreams and make that #1 in your life.

 

[I-am-someone]

Originally posted by dearsappho
So the concept of women being drawn to mystery and ambiguity is defunct then right?

Actually, this attitude can be combined perfectly with being mysterious and ambiguous.

Mysteriousness and ambiguity do not mean that you should be introvert. They are strengthened by being extravert, which makes them more effective. Being mysterious doesn't mean "not saying anything", now does it? You want to spark her interest but remain mysterious by not giving too much information about yourself, remaining a mystery yet having her total attention. As for ambiguity, it's so much more fun when you're being extravert... but it really isn't all that necessary in my opinion, because being direct is even more fun .

 

[Interpol]

Being introverted or extroverted is really not something you can change, and has little to do with DJing. Introverts can still have tight game and bag chicks.

 

[I-am-someone]

Not something you can change???
That's like saying, being an AFC isn't something you can change... You have no idea how much I have changed in only a short period of time - from being introvert as hell to being extravert as hell... it's not hard, you just gotta try it out, but most of all, really want it!

Ofcourse, you can remain introvert as much as you'd like, I'm not gonna force it on you, I'm just showing you what benefits it can give that you can never have while being introvert. If you know of benefits that being introvert have, then by all means, tell me all about them.

 

[AFK Protector]

extrovert*

Nice tip. But old.

 

[easun]

Be extravert.
Don't give a damn what other people think. You are who you are, you have to offer what you have to offer, people that don't like that aren't important, your fun is important.
Just go around,
yelling and screaming at people,
make people feel,
dance with people,
hug people,
kiss people,
lift them up in the air,
dance with people,
make people feel good about themselves,
run around singing as loud as you can because you feel like it,
go up to a girl, look at her and start laughing because you think it's too funny that she's taking herself this seriously.

Inevitably, you will walk around with a big smile on your face all day, because you are doing what YOU want to do.

I know this post is old. But this post is silly. It makes me a bit angry. Because I could do this for a few minutes, and I will NOT walk around with a big smile on my face because it TAKES energy for me to do this stuff. The fact is... I don't WANT to do that stuff... What's the point? I don't get energy from doing it. And that's the difference between a guy who actually LIKES doing stupid stuff like this and a guy like (me) who would have to spend energy to go out of his way to do this stuff and receive no recognizable "high" whatsoever from doing it. That's why we don't do it. Takes lots of energy, no reward = don't do it. Plain and simple.

So there is a misunderstanding here about what people with introverted tendencies like myself are. It's not that we don't like to have fun. It's that OUR kind of fun is different. This post is like asking an extroverted guy to do calculus problems all day, and by doing so, he'll eventually be walking around with a huge smile on his face. Sorry... it doesn't work that way.

So why do I post? Because I am still trying to figure out how to find a relationship being an introverted person such as myself. I'm highly creative, good-looking, spontaneous and fun (but not in an extroverted way), etc. but for the life of me, I can't figure this out. And it's getting me down.

Does anybody have some REAL tips?

 

[easun]

http://www.scienceagogo.com/news/19990228212951data_trunc_sys.shtml

Introverts At The Front, Extroverts To The Rear
by Kate Melville

A University of Iowa study adds to growing evidence that being shy or outgoing may be all in your head. Investigators looking at cerebral blood flow and personality found more conclusive signs of different brain activity in introverts and extroverts.

This is the first study to reveal the connections between activity of the thalamus and introversion and extroversion, said Debra L. Johnson, Ph.D., UI assistant research scientist in psychology and the study's lead investigator. "We found more evidence that people might be shy or outgoing because of the way their brains are structured, not because of experiences they've had."

Previous studies have shown that introversion and extroversion are based on variations in brain function, but those studies did not describe all the locations found in this study. The UI researchers examined 18 healthy individuals using positron emission tomography (PET) scans, which can provide a high-resolution image of the entire head.

The PET scans revealed that introverts have more activity in the frontal lobes of the brain and anterior, or front, thalamus. These areas are activated when a person's brain takes on internal processing such as remembering, problem solving and planning. Extroverts exhibit more activity in the anterior cingulate gyrus, temporal lobes and posterior thalamus. These areas are typically thought to be more involved in sensory processing such as listening, watching or driving.

The differences in cognitive style and sensory-processing relate to the qualities associated with introversion and extroversion. True introverts are quiet, inwardly focused and reclusive. Extroverts are gregarious, socially active and sensation seeking.

"Introverts get more of their stimulation internally, whereas extroverts seek outside sources," Johnson said. "Extremely introverted and extroverted personalities are two ends of a continuum, with most people falling somewhere in between."

Johnson added, "The implication is that one personality trait -- introversion or extroversion - isn't right or wrong. These variations in brain activity suggest that a lot of our individual differences have an underlying biological cause."

The subjects, 10 men and eight women, first took personality tests to determine the extent to which they were introverts or extroverts. The researchers later had the subjects lie down with their eyes closed while the PET scan measured brain activity.

"Lying quietly allows the mind to be free and do what it naturally does," Johnson explained. "When a part of the brain becomes active, there is increased blood flow to that region, which shows up on the PET scan."

The findings were published in the February issue of the American Journal of Psychiatry.

 

[zekko]

I know this post is old. But this post is silly. It makes me a bit angry. Because I could do this for a few minutes, and I will NOT walk around with a big smile on my face because it TAKES energy for me to do this stuff. The fact is... I don't WANT to do that stuff... What's the point? I don't get energy from doing it.

I think the original poster has extroverted confused with outgoing, and introverted confused with being shy. I am not shy, but I am an introvert, and I find the original post somewhat insulting, even though it's obviously silly. And the OP is obviously an extrovert by nature, since he gets so energized by his social interactions.

First off, as an introvert, I think I am less likely to "give a damn what other people think" than an extrovert. He also says that every single poster on here is an introvert, which is clearly not true. Then he goes on to say that extroverts are fun and introverts are boring. As I said, a lot of this is insulting. Truth is, I find a lot of extrovert activities boring.

Having said that, there's nothing wrong with going around with a smile on your face. And also, even if you are an introvert, it's very important that you develop social skills. When I was in my 20s I was VERY social. In my teens I WAS very shy, and in my twenties I set about to conquer it.

Put yourself in social situations and learn how to make friends and deal with people. It's a necessary life skill, and just because you are an introvert doesn't mean you can't be good at it. You won't be energized by it, but you will be learning valuable things you can use, and you can conquer the anxiety that you have dealling with people. I am not afraid to talk to anyone now, although I may not always be in the mood to. The important thing is when I want to or have to deal with people, I can.

Easun, I don't know how old you are, but I would encourage you to develop your social skills. Take opportunites to make friends, go to parties, and talk to people. Chat up girls. Find something you're good at, and convert that into social currency if you can. Introverts can be just as good at social skills as extroverts, they just may have to work at it a little harder.