be a number 5 guy

[backbreaker]

When I was around 19-20 years old, I had just started my first business, and it became clear to me 2 things... 1. i was broke and 2. I needed to learn how to sale things.

I killed 2 birds with 1 stone and got a job selling cars.

Now over the months of doing this, talking to hundreds of clients dealing with very different situations, eventually you can break down all your clients into one or a few catogories.



1. the guy who just has to buy a new car every 3 years regardless of what else is going on. doesn't necessarily need a car.. it's just what he does. it's 2012, he has a 2009 year car that **** is to old, he wants to upgrade.

2. the guy who is just happy that he can buy a car beucase his credit is too ****ty. he happily takes whatever the fvck you give him and will pretty much do anything you tell him to do short of killing someone to get in the car, down payment, stupidly high car payment, whatever doesn't matter. as long as he has a car he's happy.

3. the guy that does months of research, comes in with invoice tags and ****, knows exactly to the penny how much we have in the car and gives us a check from his bank on the spot, always 500 dollars to the penny below invoice. I don't know whats so magica about the number 500 dollars but it never fails. to the penny. he's done this enough to where he knows we will sale a new car below invoice as long as he doesn't bust our balls and makes the sale as quick as possible. and he's right. that's 1 step closer to my bonus if i can do that in an hour hell yes i will do it and take me 100 dollars.

4. the guy who is going to the movies and is killing time before he gets there stops by her and sees something he likes. lol this is my fav. you always make money on these.


but by far... the worst client of all, at least to my standpoint, by a very wide margin



5. the guy who isn't really looking for a car... but will buy one if the deal is exactly what he wants. not a penny more. that deal may be achievable, it may not be, he doesn't give a **** either way. this is what he wants and has zero qualms about walking out the door if you don't give him exactly what he wants. he's not going to make a fuss or even be mean about it.. he just wants this and if you aren't giving him this he isn't interested.
he is perfectly content with what he has and there isn't very much of anything you can do to make him do what he doesn't set out to do already. the wife is on the same page as him so you can't go that angle, the kids know what the deal is. this or we walk. you are either going to get him exactly what he wants or he's going to walk.

usually you don't end up selling the 5's.. ut when you do, they are always in a great position. one dude i sold a car to like this, got such a good deal that he came back 6 months later and traded it in and actually had equity in his car without putting a cent down. that just doesn't happen. he caught us not he last day of the month and knew we had to make our new car numbers, and he pillaged us for that car.


I told myself you know.. i'm going to be the 5 guy. when my wife moved in and I mean.. she's got a little money at least her parents do but she's not one to ask for anything for anyone, but she was carrying my child.. plus she always asked me why i never like to drive her car (Because it freaking sucks lol) so i was open to the idea of buying her a car.. and we went out and looked at cars and that's exactly how i approached it. and about 3 months later we found a car she liked and the guy had to get rid of it bad enough to where we got what i was willing to pay for it. we had to wait for it, but we got it, and we got it on our terms.

I leased a Jag XJL around a year ago give or take, i went to look at a few, but i'm perfectly content with my knock around car, i was leasing a Mercedes at the time and it was about up, wasn't even remotely close to being over the mileages so i had no qualms about just taking it back and driving my ls300 around which is my knock around car. it's a little old but clean as hell and **** i'm married i dont' give a **** i don't have to have a new car. guy gave me his card and i told him off the bat look.. i'm an ex car saleman, there isn't anything you can tell me or do that i haven't done on someone else, and i'm telling you, if you can't get me to here out the door i'm out. i dont' need a car.

every few weeks i stopped by, looked at it. took one home overnight, liked it, took it bck. i guess he thought me taking it home overnight was going to change my opinion of the car. it didn't. i still didn't need one. eventually the dude's manager calls me and says look, what the fvck man? what do we have to do to get you in this car? he was b lunt with me and told me they needed to make some sales and it was toowards the end of the month.. i toldh im i would come in. i walked in, told him exactly what i was willing to do right then.. he looked at it and said fvck it, told his salesman to write it up. wife didn't even know where i was i just came home with a new car.

I say all that to say... it's the same thing with marriage. the 5 guys, 10 out of 10 times, get the best deal. you give me what i want on my terms or i am out.

you got the guy who has it in his head to marry the first girl who looks at him. you got the guy who had some really great sex with a broad for a few days and either while drunk or whatever decide to tie the knot. you got the guy who is just happy someone is looking at him and will take anything

but the only guys who really ever come out ahead are the Number 5 guys. the guys who say look.. this is exactly wht i want. if you can't do this, i'm not mad, but i'm not going to marry you. and haven o qualms about walking.

 

[PeakIV]

I am number 5... cracking post backbreaker, never settle for second best.

 

[The Duke]

Very good summation Backbreaker. I can identify pretty well with that #5 guy. I get what I want or go with out and its no big deal. Never get emotional about it, always stay rational. Drag it out to your advantage. I also never put myself in a situation where I have to do something. I'm an "options man". When you are forced to act you end up losing the upper hand.

I'm fine treating car salesman this way, and I'm very much this way with women but I don't enjoy hearing my ltr complain about how I always get what I want, this relationship is all about UncleHowie, and how I don't do something unless its good for me. lol...she has a point but it still eats on me having to hear it. Deep down I think she admires me for this quality even tho she complains about it. You know how women are.

 

[BeDJ]

To be the 5 guy who knows what he wants, you first have to be the 1 guy.

Edit: Apologies, didn't see it was in the Married Man forums. I'll lock the door on my way out.

 

[zekko]

Well, I agree you have to be the number 5 guy when it comes to relationships.

It's interesting though, that the guy who won't settle for less than what he wants is lauded, while we ridicule women for not settling. I guess the difference is that women's expectations are less realistic?

 

[SteR]

Well, I agree you have to be the number 5 guy when it comes to relationships.

It's interesting though, that the guy who won't settle for less than what he wants is lauded, while we ridicule women for not settling. I guess the difference is that women's expectations are less realistic?

I don't think women are ridiculed for being selective - on the contrary, I'd say they deserve even more respect.

What I do find ridiculous is the women that wh0re it up their entire youth and then when their looks fade they expect to find their rich, handsome prince charming who'll take care of them for the rest of their lives.

 

[GhengisT]

I've been the #2 in the past.. Prior to that, I had co-signed on my older sister's car. Within a few months, I found that she hadn't made a single payment and was preparing to move to Vegas to be a stripper (for the um-teenth time).

When it came time to sell the sportbike, because I love riding in the rain and get a 4-wheel'd auto, that repo had destroyed my credit. I needed wheels bad. Crotch rocket was wearing out, so I bit the bullet at took a 23% interest rate.. God, that sucked.

3 years to the month, I got a chance to be a #5 guy..

I got a letter from Hyundai offering to save me some dough on my monthly payment, and I was bored on a Saturday morning. I went to the dealer to browse & fell hard for the 2013 Genesis Coupe 2.0T (6spd). It was their showroom center piece in white (which is a preferred color).

My current car was a Dodge Caliber just shy of 100K miles, which I hated from the day I bought it, but it did it's job very well. I figured since it didn't have warranty, just under 100K miles is right before the dealer trade in becomes crap, so perfect timing. They couldn't make the deal on the spot, on my terms. I had told them I didn't need a car, but if they could get me in it w/o a downpayment & the same monthly payment as my other car, I'm sold.

3 days later, last day of the month, they called me to come get my car. S*** I have warranty, and a pantie dropper.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

This is the mutha****in truth. Excuse my french!!!!

I was thinking about this the other day. When my girlfriend did something I didn't like (something very small) I chumped her off and then had to think if I wanted to break up with her or not. She didn't back talk me and was not disrespectful like my one of my exes from the summer. I was like cool.. next time it won't happen and everything is good.

I was thinking however what if she didn't back down. Would I actually be able to dump her and give her up. I thought about this for a few minutes and I told myself that it would be hard but I would easily do it and in time I will find a girl 100% co-operative and she will look just as good if not better!

If you ask me what kind of girls I deal with I will tell you these two things.

1. I only mess with fine females!!
2. I only mess with co-operative females!!!!

Only 100% co-operation!

As a man you are supposed to lead the relationship!!! Things should only bend only if you allow it. You have to lead her and the relationship. It is our duty! IF she is 70% co-operative you should be able to either fix her or leave her!

 

[backbreaker]

ti

Well, I agree you have to be the number 5 guy when it comes to relationships.

It's interesting though, that the guy who won't settle for less than what he wants is lauded, while we ridicule women for not settling. I guess the difference is that women's expectations are less realistic?

when i made my make believe list of things i woudl look for in a woman i would even consider marrying it was a pretty detailed list. She had to be somewhat exotic.. i know me too well to know that i can't have sex with a blond hair blue eyed 5'5 120 pound girl from texas for the rest of my life i don't care how nice she is. There has to be something if ind exotic about a woman if i were going to only sleep wtih her for the rest of my life. she had to be generally good tempered, into exercise and takes great care of herself, likes to do **** outside, had to be classy, had to have good credit or at least not ****ed up credit lol, had to have a reasonable amount of debt, no kids, no ex husband, had to actually enjoy having sex, was not a feminist, isn't boring in general, isn';t co dependant and can do **** on her own, and it would be icing on the cake if she were into horse racing, though i knew that might be stretching it

and sure enough i found that woman. my wife is 4 inches taller than me, British, the longest legs i've ever seen, great credit, no kids, no ex, goes to the gym every day just about and goes to yoga 2 times a week...

but the thing is, i expect all that **** out of myself. I have spotless credit, I have no debt, i work out everyday I eat right, I don't have any ex's or any kid's (before i met her at least) i can have fun on my own.. while i'm picky, i wasn't asking for anything that i wasn't myself. I just hold myself to that standard and i hold a woman who is going to be my wife to that same standard.


however, let's take one of my wife's friends. This particular woman is about what..5'7, 240-260 pounds, has an ex husband, a 12 year old who is damn near as big as she is, has a dead end job, has ****ty credit and debt out the ass, is generally just a dirty/unclean person, has litearlly, no hobbies or interest outside of facebook and reality TV. I never even fully understood how my wife met this woman they don't run in the same circles.

anyway, she wants a man that is

1. in shape
2. can "be a man and take care of me and my son"
3. wants a man who is independent, yet she herself gets in her feelings if a man she likes doesn't call her 3 times a day
4. doesn't have any baby momma drama i with any dues, even though she is the baby momma causing the drama for her ex husband.


and somehow.. she actually is able to attract, like, not hideous dudes. honestly she isn't ugly she's ust fat lol. if she were 100 pounds lighter she wouldn't' look bad at all. but she isn't.

i mean, she's lving in fantasy land. I on the other hand, was just holding a woman to the same standards that i hold myself to.

 

[backbreaker]

I've been the #2 in the past.. Prior to that, I had co-signed on my older sister's car. Within a few months, I found that she hadn't made a single payment and was preparing to move to Vegas to be a stripper (for the um-teenth time).

When it came time to sell the sportbike, because I love riding in the rain and get a 4-wheel'd auto, that repo had destroyed my credit. I needed wheels bad. Crotch rocket was wearing out, so I bit the bullet at took a 23% interest rate.. God, that sucked.

3 years to the month, I got a chance to be a #5 guy..

I got a letter from Hyundai offering to save me some dough on my monthly payment, and I was bored on a Saturday morning. I went to the dealer to browse & fell hard for the 2013 Genesis Coupe 2.0T (6spd). It was their showroom center piece in white (which is a preferred color).

My current car was a Dodge Caliber just shy of 100K miles, which I hated from the day I bought it, but it did it's job very well. I figured since it didn't have warranty, just under 100K miles is right before the dealer trade in becomes crap, so perfect timing. They couldn't make the deal on the spot, on my terms. I had told them I didn't need a car, but if they could get me in it w/o a downpayment & the same monthly payment as my other car, I'm sold.

3 days later, last day of the month, they called me to come get my car. S*** I have warranty, and a pantie dropper.

actually if you want to get the best value for your trade in, the very best, you need to do so before it hits 60k miles. That way they can atually re sell it on the lot beucse then banks can finance it. banks, at least good ones, can't/won't finance something with 80-100k miles on it but a 3-4year old car with 55k miles tehy will dot hat all day long. that means the dealer can give you alittle more for it beucase they know they are going to be the ones selling it so they can just make it back up on the lot. '

selling used cares is really really tricky. you can sale the same car 3 times for the same amount and you can make 100 on one, 1000 on another and 3000 on the other. every week i would just focus on the best 5 used cars we had on the lot, knew what we had in them and what we could sell it for. i used to love when we got jag s types in those went quick and they had horrible resell lol, i used tob ust heads on those.

 

[blindnowisee]

I just hold myself to that standard and i hold a woman who is going to be my wife to that same standard.

^^
This

I feel this sums up the problems the majority of people on this forum are facing. In my opinion the "standard" can be broken down into the following aspects:

1- Your life: You should have a positive outlook on life. Everyday you will be hit by challenges, adversity etc etc but it is how you deal with all of this that will define you as a person. You will form the rock of a household - you should have an aura of invincibility about yourself - something breaks? you fix it. Big decision time? No hesitation. Be the leader. Begin with leading your own life.. don't let life lead you.

2- Your work: Are you currently chasing your dreams i.e. doing what you enjoy doing the most (work-wise)? Are you pushing your own boundaries? Have you rejected mediocrity and are you creating your own path?

3- Your passions: Outside of work - do you actually have passions / interests / hobbies? I'm not talking about 'watching television' or 'internet'.. I'm talking about stuff that defines you as a person.. "going hiking", "going for your private pilots license", "cookies extravagant meals" etc

4- Your goals/aspirations/future: what are you here for? Have you got a clear picture in your mind as to how you see the future? What kind of a person do you want to become; define him and strive to become him. What kind of job do you want? Same thing: define it and then work towards it. This should be projected on your future gf/wife as well.. who do you see when you close your eyes? What does she look like? What characteristics are you looking for?

"If you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there"

This has turned into a bit of a rant ;-)

 

[goundra]

I gave up on the "for life" idea 30 years ago. you ****ing know how long "life" might end up being, for god's sake? 70 effing years! there's no way in HELL, man. probably not even going to be 3 women can hold my attentin for anything like that long. Not that I've got more than 15-20 worthwhile years left to me,

 

[GhengisT]

I feel this sums up the problems the majority of people on this forum are facing. In my opinion the "standard" can be broken down into the following aspects:

1- Your life: You should have a positive outlook on life. Everyday you will be hit by challenges, adversity etc etc but it is how you deal with all of this that will define you as a person. You will form the rock of a household - you should have an aura of invincibility about yourself - something breaks? you fix it. Big decision time? No hesitation. Be the leader. Begin with leading your own life.. don't let life lead you.

2- Your work: Are you currently chasing your dreams i.e. doing what you enjoy doing the most (work-wise)? Are you pushing your own boundaries? Have you rejected mediocrity and are you creating your own path?

3- Your passions: Outside of work - do you actually have passions / interests / hobbies? I'm not talking about 'watching television' or 'internet'.. I'm talking about stuff that defines you as a person.. "going hiking", "going for your private pilots license", "cookies extravagant meals" etc

4- Your goals/aspirations/future: what are you here for? Have you got a clear picture in your mind as to how you see the future? What kind of a person do you want to become; define him and strive to become him. What kind of job do you want? Same thing: define it and then work towards it. This should be projected on your future gf/wife as well.. who do you see when you close your eyes? What does she look like? What characteristics are you looking for?

"If you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there"

Solid advice!