Article: "Charm School" in NYC

Bible_Belt

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"Charm school" helps men perfect the pick-up
Aug 14, 2006

By Matthew Verrinder

NEW YORK (Reuters) - Ben had a rough Friday night picking up women on the Hotel Gansevoort's balcony after being coldly rejected by two attractive blonds.

The 23-year-old documentary filmmaker, who asked his last name not be used for fear of ridicule, suffers from an acute case of "premature ejectulation" -- ejecting himself early from promising conversations with women for fear of rejection.

Such was the diagnosis from the coaches of "Charm School Boot Camp," a three-day crash course on seducing women that Ben and five other men paid $1,600 apiece for in early August.

"If I were to look at it objectively, I would feel really good about it, and then just leave," Ben said.

Ben is not the only man with crippling fears when it comes to chatting up women. That's why Charm School, run by an Ann Arbor, Michigan-based company called Charisma Arts, has no problem finding men who need intense guidance and fieldwork approaching women at places like bookstores and bars.

"People think we're teaching guys with no confidence who are bad with women," said Charisma Arts co-founder Wayne Elise. "We teach guys how to be themselves in a very unnatural environment, how to cold approach strangers and make them comfortable enough to open themselves up."

Charisma Arts runs weekend Charm School seminars in New York, Los Angeles, San Francisco, London and Sydney. Some students find out about the course from the company's Web site, www.charismaarts.com.

The Charm School's lesson plan stays away from canned lines and instructs men to think on their feet when talking to women, to put their insecurities aside and react naturally to a women's subtle cues, said Johnny Saviour, 21, a Charisma Arts instructor.

The class starts on Friday afternoon with the instructors going over Elise's attraction theory. They then practice the theory by approaching each other as if they were women, and they do word association exercises to get their minds tuned into keeping a conversation with a woman rolling.

After a night approaching women at a bar or club, the instructors hold a debriefing the next morning and go over what the participants did right and wrong. Then they head out again to hit on more women.

THE MORNING AFTER...

Ben and the five other participants, ranging in age from 21 to 43, met with their four coaches Saturday at a McDonald's near Union Square, the morning after a deflating evening of hitting on women at the Gansevoort.

Sam, a stocky, recent college graduate from Boston with shaved head and thick chain around his neck, said he is tired of sleeping with "drunk chicks" and wants to learn how to properly "pursue and attain" the women of his choice.

Tim, 23, a New York piano tuner, said his new full-time job makes it hard for him to meet women.

"This was something I was willing to splurge on," said Tim, who also did not want to give his last name. "I live in a city with millions of women, and I want to meet some of them."

Ben said that despite his lack of luck with women on Friday night, he tried to "learn a little from each interaction."

Forty minutes later, he was standing in a nearby Barnes & Noble book store, eyeing a small woman in a hat and glasses who was thumbing through a book. He sidled up to her and took a book from a shelf near her, but she didn't notice him and soon walked away without talking to him.

"A lot of guys defeat themselves right away," Saviour whispered, looking on. "If he thinks she's not interested, he'll clam up. That's exactly what happened."

To get Ben back on track, Savior has him talk to a male store clerk so he can interact with another person without pressure. Soon, Ben approaches another woman but she too walks away without noticing him.

"I feel a bit shaken up," Ben said after his latest rejection. "There is information coming from a lot of different places. I feel a bit like a pickup artist."

By the early hours of Sunday at a crowded rooftop bar on Fifth Avenue, Ben finally has a confident glow. Other Charm School students are partying on the fringes of a drunken bachelorette party full of New Jersey women.

But Ben, dressed in a dark shirt and slacks and standing tall in the middle of the crowd, has already talked to four groups of women by 11:30 p.m., made some connections and is on the lookout for more.

Just a day into Charm School, Ben says he has begun to absorb some of its tenets, like honestly justifying to the women why he has approached them, genuinely stating their uniqueness, then making slight, gentlemanly physical contact, like a touch of the arm at just the right time.

"I would say in terms of last night's performance, I've definitely found my path to fulfillment," he said. "Last night I felt uncomfortable, but I've taken in what they've taught me. I've been myself, and it's worked."

http://today.reuters.com/news/artic...1.xml&WTmodLoc=NewsArt-L3-In+Depth+NewsNews-2
 

diplomatic_lies

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$1600 could buy 800 cans of good beer, 16 hours of sex with 2 drunken Australian hookers, a secondhand car, or 3200 Chupa Chups.

Its sad how we put so much value into women and sex that we spend thousands of dollars on it.
 

doctoroxygen

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diplomatic_lies said:
Its sad how we put so much value into women and sex that we spend thousands of dollars on it.
Or post 4,000 times in 4 years on a website devoted to it...

I don't think there's anything sad about taking a workshop like that.
 

diplomatic_lies

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doctoroxygen said:
Or post 4,000 times in 4 years on a website devoted to it...
It takes 10-15 seconds a post, 75% posted at work, -50% idle chat, that's 2 hours of my life in 4 years. Average man earns $15/h.

So I "spent" $30 for the same crap they teach at $1600 seminars. Best deal of my life.
 

Skel

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I think its brilliant. I should have come up with this idea a long time ago.
 

Channel your excited feelings into positive thoughts and behaviors. You will attract women by being enthusiastic, radiating energy, and becoming someone who is fun to be around.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Shiftkey

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FYI, Wayne Elise is Juggler. The man knows his sh1t. And you could probably learn a lot more from a seminar with him than from posting on a forum.
 

SELF-MASTERY

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I should have taking a workshop instead of posting here. I have 99 more posts to go before I quit this place for good...

No one learns the game by sitting on their ass and post whoring on seduction forums.
 

DJDamage

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All the tools you need to approach women is right here and in fastseduction and guess what?? Its for free.

If you got to shell out over a $1000 for 3 days because you need a dating guru to spoon feed you everything, you are in trouble. What happens after the 3 days when there is no one standing behind you and pushing you to get better with women ?? Do you believe most of those guys will become natural PUA's or revert back to their AFC selves???! It takes alot longer then 3 days to believe in yourself.

For over a $1000 you can get a gym membership for a whole year. You are better off starting there as oppose of being a fat slob with no life and wondering why chicks are ignoring your ass.
 

doctoroxygen

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Most people who take workshops will revert to their prior selves within a few weeks. Some others who take workshops will become Tyler Durden.

Comparing reading SoSuave to getting personal coaching is like comparing reading a medical textbook to going to the doctor when you're sick: totally different situations. Watching how it's done is invaluable.
 

At this point you probably have a woman (or multiple women) chasing you around, calling you all the time, wanting to be with you. So let's talk about how to KEEP a woman interested in you once you have her. This is BIG! There is nothing worse than getting dumped by a woman that you really, really like.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

A-Unit

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Re:

1. I personally haven't taken one, but having been to WORKSHOPS and through COACHING sessions in other areas of my life, my advice would be as a COACH. A one day or even work-long workshop can't change a WHOLE lifetime of habits, beliefs, or thought-patterns. Can it, guys? Sure, for those 3days you're amped up, you get one on one attention, but what happens after it? It's the same disease you get from reading or attending a motivational seminar. You're pumped WHILE you do it, but when the seminar or book ends, what happens next. Of course this is on the USER and not on the COACH/TEACHER, but it also isn't STRUCTURED to account for the wide array of variability found in real life. Were I to consider a Workshop, I'd want to go to an advanced one. The Beginner and Intermediate levels can be had here, on mASF, and through books. I'd rather hang with a few local guys, chew the game back n forth, wing together, than spend anything over $200 for a seminar, of which MOST info can be found and assimilated on your own.

2. As guys here knows, it's an ONGOING process, not a one day or one week deal. If you're new here, there's some things I would, that can be had for FAR less money:

I. Get David D's ****y and Funny CD disc program. I think it's $100 bucks. Listen to it all the time. Heck, play video games while you do it. Just listen and listen and listen. Eventually it will become second nature.

II. Buy some if not all of the books he recommends in there. Some will be about changing your beliefs, some will be about how to please women, and some will be about success. All of them are valuable, it just depends on your goals.

III. Read and post @ Sosuave and mASF and at the site Supreme Player went to. ALL have value in different ways.

IV. Constantly improve. As you DIG in, you'll learn things or an edge you want to sharpen, that might be UNIQUE. I found out alot about NLP and Hypnosis and dabble there quite a bit. I also bought books on MASSAGES and on the female body and read them quite regularly. I would prefer to be in a position where I know MORE about her body than she knows about her OWN body.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As you progress...you'll discover your own path. You'll realize it's about defining YOU, not about acquiring rigid tactics that you have to remember and practice. If I have to be some programmed robot to acquire social prizes, I don't want it. I'd want to know my effort comes from my own ability, and not from someone's elses tactics.

I don't keep a record of approaches. When I want something from the FIELD, I go out into it and get it. It's like fishing; when I'm hungry, I fish, cook, and eat. I don't mind being blown out by a chick, because I retell the story all the time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Funny story with my gf, that reminds me...

Pardon the hijack, but I laughed my own ass off at this...

I got this gift set for my bday back in July from an aunt and uncle. It was a "Life is Good" football and frisbee. My gf and I went to the beach, which we hadn't done yet. The waters are cold up here in the Northeast, but we finally made our way into it. I raced her down to the water, and then proceeded to DRENCH her. After pushing her in 10-15 times, she said "get the new football." I jogged on back to the beach, which was about 10-20 feet higher than the ocean since we were atop the sand dunes. A good gust was coming up, and I'd never thrown the ball yet, but I figured I'd chuck it to her. I wound up, thinking it would fly slowly to her and it SAILS her head by at least 50 feet out deep into the ocean. This, all in front of the beach. I'm like..."Oh shyt...Go get it!" Since she's closer, I'm figuring she'll swim after it before it gets lost out at sea. Nope, no dice. She stands there, in the cold water like "You idiot, I'm not swimming after it!"

I rush down to the water like Hasselhoff and jump out there. I'm up to my neck in the water and STILL, only half way to the ball. I'm like "Shyt, I can't get that, if the lifeguard doesn't wave me back, I'm gonna drown anyways. For what, a ball I threw once?" Forget it. My gf looks at me and says..."Well, Life WAS Good." I mumble a laugh and partial fake cry as a boy who's lost his favorite ball on one stupid throw.

Then...all of a sudden I hear massive splashing...someone comes flying by men like a pro-swimmer. I say to myself..."Either he's stealing my ball, or he's getting it for me, and both situations are gonna suck." And sure enough, this jacked guy does. I say guy, but he must have been a kid, about 20, chugging through the action. Perhaps he was a pro swimmer, because he went where few lifeguards go and our beach has TONS of current and riptides. Sure enough, he's on his way back to me with my ball.

I look at my gf and say, "Should I give you to him for a night since he saved the ball?" Her reply: "What!? No!" "Well, then maybe I should give him the frisbee, because I sure feel like a pvssy now." He comes in and I said to him "Wow, was it deep and hard to swim out there?" He says, "Yeah, do you want your ball?" Me: "Yeah, thanks. Thanks, Alot." And off he went. It was friggin stupid and funny. I felt like such a dope when I threw it, even stupider when it was saved by someone else. I'd told that story in person to about 10 people and everyone laughed heartily. I'm an OK swimmer, but too many people had been rescued at my beach or drowned for me to risk my life for a football. Thankfully, I didn't have to, and it was most definately a nice act by a stranger.



A-Unit
 
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