Arranged marriage and female choice

[Pandora]

Roosh V once wrote that the greatest corrupter of Western women is too much choice. Based on how my female friends run their lives i tend to agree. Many women dont know how to pick a guy and end up being in self destructive relationships. The irony of this is that these women have the pick of the liter. Its like having a million dollars, going to the car dealership and still buying a lemon.

When you look at other cultures there are strong social and family pressures involved in dating. Even in pre-sexual revolution America there was a lot of family involvement in dating. This leads to better outcomes. Arranged marriages work at a much higher rate than non arranged marriages. The crazy thing about this is that many times the women states that if she didn't initially love the guy, that she eventually grew to love him after being in the arranged marriage for a while.

I have attractive female "friends" from Eastern cultures that for a long time were almost begging their family to set them up after they had been on the dating scene for a while. It takes the choice out of their hands. It is a relief to them. Now im not advocating Sharia law or anything even close. What i am saying is that many women would benefit with more of a community/ family input when it comes to dating. Tyranny of choice works on women too. Choice is not always good. Arranged marriages are often surprisingly functional.

Imagine having a Jay Leno sized car collection. Im talking hundreds of nice cars and you were asked to pick a car to drive. You would pick and disqualify cars based on stupid reasons. "Oh i dont want the Acura TSX because its not cool enough". You would randomly pick one car and then back rationalize why you choose this one particular car. In reality most of the cars would serve your basic purpose of getting from point A to point B reliably. Being an attractive girl that goes out to the clubs and bars is like having a Jay Leno sized car collection. Ur gonna pick cars for a variety of not so good reasons. Half the time ur gonna pick a car on a whim becuz its easier that way.

Im telling you guys that a lot ( not all) of this disqualification done by women is bulls***. I have seen women put in a situation where there options were limited for a couple of years. I lived outside the USA with a bunch of students. The women's choices diminished greatly becuz it was an underdeveloped country. The guys that they would never have looked at in the USA when their options were endless are now dating them. These relationship actually worked well. The guy was a nice guy who would have been friendzoned or disqualified in the USA and the girl is happily in a relationship with him. Both parties are happy. Look at how women who hit the "wall" magical change their criteria. They then marry guys that they would have sworn they were not attracted to back in the day. So its just a coincidence that since you have run out of choices that the chemistry decides to show up for the average dude huh?

Choice even corrupts men. That 6/10 that would have been perfectly fine in the 1950's when casually dating was frowned on, now is not quite good enough. We men think we some how deserve a hot azz chick that cooks and cleans. But thats another topic. I am trying to impart this lesson on to my younger sister. Im warning her that too much pickiness can ruin ur life. Pick a nice guy with a career and stick with him. I guess when we have daughters we gotta be actively involved in their dating lives. Cuz left to their own devices women tend to make interesting choices.

 

[( . )( . )]

Choice even corrupts men. That 6/10 that would have been perfectly fine in the 1950's when casually dating was frowned on, now is not quite good enough.

Difference being with women's elevated testosterone levels creating lantern manjaws and strange little half men hybrids, unchained hypergamy pushing out 80 to 90% of men from the sexual market, and the current epidemic of fat assery that's swept through the West that 6/10 is today's 9/10.

Apart from that I agree with your post. It's no secret women have no clue of what's good for them which has a knock on effect as to what's good for the greater society. That's why her father or family elders always picked out her husband. Was common knowledge for thousands of years. We now are seeing firsthand what happens when your dependable civilization builders (today's "betas") are no longer incentivized.

The crazy thing about this is that many times the women states that if she didn't initially love the guy, that she eventually grew to love him after being in the arranged marriage for a while.

That's called pair bonding and is only possible for women who have had society (other women, as it used to be) check her taco tingles. ie : little to no c@ck hopping.

 

[Pandora]

That's called pair bonding and is only possible for women who have had society (other women, as it used to be) check her taco tingles. ie : little to no c@ck hopping.

I like this a lot. The elimination of the pair bonding instinct is a real effect of promiscuity and serial dating. This is basically what i am trying to say.

 

[Colossus]

Arranged marriages work at a much higher rate than non arranged marriages. The crazy thing about this is that many times the women states that if she didn't initially love the guy, that she eventually grew to love him after being in the arranged marriage for a while.

This is a misleading statistic. Arranged marriages, in traditional cultures, DO tend to have lower rates of dissolution, but you have to look at the culture in question and the social norms of these families. Divorce is HIGHLY frowned upon and in some of the more conservative "old world" cultures it is extremely shameful for a woman to be divorced. They don't have the same fluffy ideas of "love" that we do in the west and it is more about a functional, rather than emotional, marriage for them.

That said, I do think that too much choice can corrupt, especially in women. It amounts to greed, entitlement, poor role models, and a host of other factors.

Hypergamy really is unchained these days and I think a huge part of it is we have given them too much power. We hold them in higher esteem than their behavior deserves, and we live in a society that makes excuses and concessions for what was considered deplorable behavior for hundreds of years.

In a nutshell, we have given women an inch and they have taken miles. They now have more choice than they ever have before, and they still want more. They have a vastly inflated sense of value because they are told from birth that they can have it all, that they are just as good or better than boys, wives are the most important person in the household, and men are mostly here to serve them. It has gone from "what can i do to be a better wife and please my husband" to, "what can I get out of life and what isn't my man doing to make me happy".

It's not so much that women are DOING more these days; that is fine for the most part. It's they have become totally disconnected with the fact that men built the world they live in, and they absolutely cannot live without us. It is straight up delusional to think otherwise. They have collectively lost a lot of respect for men, and men have become wimps who wont stand up for themselves and thus let their women run roughshod over everything. This was even foreshadowed in the book of Genesis, when God was speaking to Eve, some 3500-4000 years ago:

"And your desire will be to control your husband, but he will rule over you."

Gen. 3:16


Anyways, that was mostly a rant but I don't think any rational male would disagree this has become the norm. I think this is a problem we can turn around, but it is going to take a couple of generations.

 

[Lexington]

Women should be allowed to have as much choice as they want. The problem in Western society today is that the market is rigged in their favor. They can divorce not only without any social stigma, they usually get a huge bonanza out of it through family court. They can also get knocked up and collect child support and government benefits (free healthcare, WIC, food stamps, subsidized housing etc.)

In effect, we are incentivizing bad behavior. In most third world countries, nobody would touch a post-Wall divorced single mother with a 30 foot pole....especially one without a job or money. Here, we give her money/benefits, praise her as a "hero" in the media and she'd still have some beta chumps lining up to support her. Of course, all the while she laments the lack of "real men."

If women actually had to compete in a free sexual market instead of the heavily socialized system we have today, they would be a lot less picky, be lower maintenance and higher performance.

 

[evan12]

Many women dont know how to pick a guy and end up being in self destructive relationships

I kind of disagree, when women choose the "wrong guy" the clearly understand what is coming , usually they choose him because inside they dont want commitment. if they suddenly find themselves want commitment they choose that nice guy with a good job , I found that many times . but they claim he was the wrong guy to look innocent .
the only wrong thing some women do is the timing of transferring from choosing guys based on their sexeness to based on their providing ability. some women take more risk and they no longer can get a decent guy to be husband , while other who are less risk taker start settling earlier , or it is their nature to want to have kids and family, in the end a lot of women dream in family and kids .

 

[parkthebus]

It's not that they don't know what's best for them. They do. It's just not what they want.

 

[CuddleJunkie]

It's not that they don't know what's best for them. They do. It's just not what they want.

These words are full of wisdom.