arguing with the Edges theory

[flava]

thank you for that post GynecologistEnthusiast. its good to hear you interpretation from edges theory.

but let me share why i totally disagree with that. Actually me and my best friend where talking about ways we could have kept past girlfriends if we werent AFCs back in the old days. As we were walking outside the mall to see a movie i asked him "do you ever know why marina left you?"

"lets compare your relationship with you and your ex and you and your car. remeber a while ago as to where all you could think about getting that 328is. everyday you would talk about it, how fast it is, how good it looks, blah blah blah. well then you finally got it, and you drove that car like it was the best car and that you would never get rid of it. but then as the days go by, you drive that car everyday, day in and day out."

"then you say that it doesnt quite feel how it did when you first got it, how its not as fast or it doesnt have that 'look' anymore and how that M3 was so much better. you were thinking about finding a way to trade your car in to get that better M3."

then i went on to say

"you see your realtionship with your ex is like the one with your car. when your ex first saw you, all she could think about is you, and all she would talk about is you to me and all her friends. just like you did with you car. but then as time went by your ex realized that you didnt give her that feeling of when you first got together, how she no longer get butterflies, and that she feels smothered, and as a matter in fact shes even bored. sounds kinda familar?

"but then one day your ex stumbled upon a M3 of a guy. not just any guy. a guy that gave her those same feelings of how things 'used to be'. why he was even so much fun, that they had a blast every time they went out."

" so she looked at you and decided that she no longer wanted to be with you as she met this new and exciting guy. kinda like how you know longer want this car but the more powerful better m3."

so then my freind gets the point quickly and says

"you know brendan, that absolutly make sense. there was never anything there to keep her on her toes just like there was nothing there to really keep my interest in the car."

me:"well how would you go about doing that?"

him:" well for instace if i put all diffrent types of parts on my car to make it faster, perform better,and outshine the M3, i would no longer see any reason to get the M3 since my current one would be better, just like if i had constantly kept my ex on her toes, had never knowing whats gonna happen next, if i was just a DJ she would have never gone to the other guy since i would have been a far better catch."

you see my fellow don juans and don juannabes, even in a LTR your still a DJ. Both a DJ and a jerk can get a girl rather easily, but what separates the DJ form the jerk is that he knows how to keep them coming back for more. As DJs we have to constantly keep our girlfriend coming back for more because if we dont, we turn into a AFC and lose our realtionship over our mistakes which made 90% of us come to this site. so think twice before you decide to hang your DJ hat up.

PEACE

 

[InLawsHateMe]

Originally posted by flava
thank you for that post GynecologistEnthusiast. its good to hear you interpretation from edges theory.

but let me share why i totally disagree with that. Actually me and my best friend where talking about ways we could have kept past girlfriends if we werent AFCs back in the old days. As we were walking outside the mall to see a movie i asked him "do you ever know why marina left you?"

"lets compare your relationship with you and your ex and you and your car. remeber a while ago as to where all you could think about getting that 328is. everyday you would talk about it, how fast it is, how good it looks, blah blah blah. well then you finally got it, and you drove that car like it was the best car and that you would never get rid of it. but then as the days go by, you drive that car everyday, day in and day out."

"then you say that it doesnt quite feel how it did when you first got it, how its not as fast or it doesnt have that 'look' anymore and how that M3 was so much better. you were thinking about finding a way to trade your car in to get that better M3."

then i went on to say

"you see your realtionship with your ex is like the one with your car. when your ex first saw you, all she could think about is you, and all she would talk about is you to me and all her friends. just like you did with you car. but then as time went by your ex realized that you didnt give her that feeling of when you first got together, how she no longer get butterflies, and that she feels smothered, and as a matter in fact shes even bored. sounds kinda familar?

"but then one day your ex stumbled upon a M3 of a guy. not just any guy. a guy that gave her those same feelings of how things 'used to be'. why he was even so much fun, that they had a blast every time they went out."

" so she looked at you and decided that she no longer wanted to be with you as she met this new and exciting guy. kinda like how you know longer want this car but the more powerful better m3."

so then my freind gets the point quickly and says

"you know brendan, that absolutly make sense. there was never anything there to keep her on her toes just like there was nothing there to really keep my interest in the car."

me:"well how would you go about doing that?"

him:" well for instace if i put all diffrent types of parts on my car to make it faster, perform better,and outshine the M3, i would no longer see any reason to get the M3 since my current one would be better, just like if i had constantly kept my ex on her toes, had never knowing whats gonna happen next, if i was just a DJ she would have never gone to the other guy since i would have been a far better catch."

you see my fellow don juans and don juannabes, even in a LTR your still a DJ. Both a DJ and a jerk can get a girl rather easily, but what separates the DJ form the jerk is that he knows how to keep them coming back for more. As DJs we have to constantly keep our girlfriend coming back for more because if we dont, we turn into a AFC and lose our realtionship over our mistakes which made 90% of us come to this site. so think twice before you decide to hang your DJ hat up.

PEACE

Nice Flava... very well put, thanks.... I think this is just another version of what some of us have been saying for I think, two days? LOL!!!! Trouble is, I don't think the comprehension is sticking. This debate will continue for the ones who want it, and it will be nothing but a post to others.

It's true though... being in a DJ in a LTR, it's a skill all it's own. It's just DJ'ing to another level. Progress, evolving.... if for nothing else, it's a learning experience that should be taught to every single guy here, PERIOD. It's better to know, than not know what it's like to be in a LTR. So many things to learn, so many ways to improve yourself upon it. It's like if you were to ask me what to do in a DJ situation, I could answer it, cuz I've been there. Now, if you were to ask me about LTR, I can help you there too. I've got my feet in both of those worlds, I've got game all over the place. Personally, call it what you want. I'll call it 'Friendship'.....

 

[drZaius09]

Originally posted by flava
him:" well for instace if i put all diffrent types of parts on my car to make it faster, perform better,and outshine the M3, i would no longer see any reason to get the M3 since my current one would be better, just like if i had constantly kept my ex on her toes, had never knowing whats gonna happen next, if i was just a DJ she would have never gone to the other guy since i would have been a far better catch."

There's one problem. For a car this is fine. A good car is reliable, always there when you need it, has VALUE, doesn't give you sh1t when you need a ride. For a girl, this is just too much work for little reward. They are not worth the trouble. I'd rather put my time and effort into something that would return the favor. You can continue to dump your resources down the toilet if you like, but I choose to be smarter with my investments.

 

[GirlCrazy]

Trouble is, I don't think the comprehension is sticking.

Bah some of us don't have time to frequent the site every day! Just cause I've been away for a few days doesn't mean I should miss out on a good argument does it?

Actually I don't feel like arguing right now, but damn now I want an M3 Now if only my wife would let me buy one...hehe just kidding

 

[drZaius09]

As an addendum to my last post, I have been noticing a growing trend of posts like these on this board. People here seem to be embracing this absurd mentality that it is a man's job to do ALL THE WORK in a relationship; as if sexual gratification is the only requisite that a woman must bring to the table. Keep her on her toes ... Never let her know what to expect ... ad nauseum. This is Bullsh1t. And it's scary to see this, especially on this site. We should instead be discussing what a woman must do to keep us interested in a relationship. As in, how she should distinguish herself from every other wet hole and pair of t1ts on the planet. But rather we focus on the next hoop we must jump through to maintain our fleeting grasp on whatever b1tch happens to be controlling our lives at the present moment.

 

[GynecologyEnthusiast]

Originally posted by GirlCrazy
Bah some of us don't have time to frequent the site every day! Just cause I've been away for a few days doesn't mean I should miss out on a good argument does it?

That's the reason I reposted, GC...because I thought it was an interesting argument and I had missed it. I had no idea what nerves I would hit with some of these guys who are in LTR's but still want to think of themselves as "DJs."

So what is a DJ? Well, everyone seems to have their own definition.

To me it means what it means based on the purpose of this message board, which has the words Don Juan at the top.

At the end of the day, this message board is and has always been about pulling chicks. There are other boards for relationship management, etc...

I'll go with the sosuave definition. It's about pulling chicks. You're either doing it or you're not. The reasons don't matter.

 

[InLawsHateMe]

...oh and you're a b*tch.

LOL!

 

[GynecologyEnthusiast]

But you're my b!tch. As we all can see so clearly.

It just keeps getting worse for you doesn't it, my little flower?

Good night, little b1tch. I love the way you waggle your gay little tongue for me, little girl.

 

[InLawsHateMe]

Don't run away.....


b*tch.

 

[GynecologyEnthusiast]

Come up with something funny and I'll keep the insult "contest" going. But you don't have any material so it's too boring.

I'll take the victory by knockout.

 

[InLawsHateMe]

Originally posted by GynecologyEnthusiast
Come up with something funny and I'll keep the insult "contest" going. But you don't have any material so it's too boring.

I'll take the victory by knockout.

Let there be no doubt.... you're a b*tch! LOL!!

 

[GirlCrazy]

Not only do we have differing opinions of what a "DJ" is, we also differ about the purpose of this site. Yeah of course it's mainly about picking up on chicks. But many guys have many issues relating to women, relationships, sex, etc. My personal opinion is that these subjects are so inter-related you will never be able to separate them. Like it or not men come here to talk all things that have to do with women, and until the mods start banning people or scolding us for being off topic I'm gonna post on any subject that interests me.

Not that I care whether I'm seen as a card carrying DJ, but how would being in an LTR affect the quality of anyone's advice? It's not like the LTR folks like myself suddenly forgot how to pull women. I still see the LTR as the highest evolved form of DJ'ing. I can have any woman I want, and I choose her. If anything some of us older guys have far more experience with women than most of the young bucks on the site. For the younger guys my advice is to experience as many women as possible until you learn exactly what you're looking for in a chick. But over time pulling chicks loses its magic. It's like a tiger hunting prey that WANTS to be caught. The tiger begins to see the chase as a mere formality, the result known in advance. And maybe the tiger won't even catch this gazelle today, but he knows that he will catch another, then another. After a while a man just wants more out of life.

I feel sorry for people that have never experienced an LTR, not to mention marriage. I had avoiding commitment down to a science, then I met the one girl that changed all that. How can you ever know what it's like to ask a girl to marry you, or pace back and forth in an emergency room all night knowing that the person that means the whole world to you might not be ok. Or the joys of fatherhood, and the sadness of explaining to a 4 year old why the family cat isn't coming home from the vet. The experience of being at the alter and having the most manly man you have ever known come up to you in tears and say "My God she is SO beautiful". I couldn't imagine landing that big promotion with the stellar bonus check and having nobody but a one night stand to share that euphoria with.

Pulling chicks, that's fvcking child's play. You want a real challenge? Try an LTR. And please don't diss the LTR folks unless you have been in an LTR yourself.

 

[GynecologyEnthusiast]

GC, I've been in several LTRs myself. One lasted as long as three years. Another for two and a half. A couple of about a year. And quite a few in the six month range or so.

I'm not dissing it at all. I like them as well. But in my humble opinion, once you get into the LTR (beyond the first few months) one can't help but become less and less DJ-like. Anyway, I think we agree this is really an argument of definitions and semantics...it's just that the two of us entered the argument late.

There are many advantages to LTRs...but they are different than what this board is chiefly concerned with. VBG made some solid comments above on why people want to post here.

 

[InLawsHateMe]

Originally posted by GynecologyEnthusiast
GC, I've been in several LTRs myself. One lasted as long as three years. Another for two and a half. A couple of about a year. And quite a few in the six month range or so.

I'm not dissing it at all. I like them as well. But in my humble opinion, once you get into the LTR (beyond the first few months) one can't help but become less and less DJ-like. Anyway, I think we agree this is really an argument of definitions and semantics...it's just that the two of us entered the argument late.

There are many advantages to LTRs...but they are different than what this board is chiefly concerned with. VBG made some solid comments above on why people want to post here.

LOL!!!! ....ladies and gentleman.. THE BIIIIIATCH IS BACK!!!


Dude, someone should have told you that your sister and mother don't coun tin those relationship... get the f*ck out of here!! LOL!!!