Are good looking guys immune to sh!t tests, games, and rejections

[Dhoulmagus]

I see more women with beer muscled, unmaintained facial hair, wannabe country guys than I do with good looking guys. I'm considered good looking and I can't get **** for girls. I've had girls tell me that I'm good looking and when I tried pursuing them they acted like I was air. Hell, the recent girl I was hooking up with only pursued me because she thought I was hot and now she is playing games and flaking on outings with me. I haven't done anything with a girl since May.

 

[floydb25]

Nope... which is why you CAN'T rely on looks alone. With a lot of guys, it's just looks. Good looking nice girls are the ticket. But with girls, it's looks + other ****. They won't respect you if you're not assertive, don't stand up for yourself, act weak and "nice", and all that crap.

Just remember that this **** doesn't happen to strong, threatening, assertive guys. Much like how a guy might bully you for being weak - so too will an object of your interest. Bishes bully guys all the time... though it's usually done emotionally, and passive-aggressively. Things like playing games, manipulating, flaking, stringing along, teasing, etc. And if they can get away with it - verbal assaults and insulting. Not so "nice"...

 

[nismo-4]

No guy is immune. Good looking guys just get less resistance, excuses, tests, games, etc. Key word is less.

OP, you might not be that attractive. Sorry. Understand that words don't mean sh*t. Judge by actions. A woman can tell a man he's handsome or whatever, but handsome my ass if she flakes or plays games. Or you just so happen to be running into a lot of attention wh0res.

Case closed.

 

[NewJack]

Look to connection to understand what is happening. Imagine an invisible emotional connection, which although you can't see it, determines more about your relationship life than your looks ever will.

The strength of connection is what pulls her back to you. Looks can't do this. With these last few girls, you haven't shared enough of yourself to make anyone really care. Thats how we all start out, of course, so no worries.

The length and depth of your conversations, or the moments you share together, is generally a clue to how strong the connection is. You will be able to feel it as an emotion when you are around her.

If the connection isn't sweet, they don't stay around.

 

[henrea4]

When I read your opening post, your title no longer makes sense. You're a "good-looking guy" and you (by your own admission) get rejected. So, of course you're not immune to it.

 

[Dhoulmagus]

No guy is immune. Good looking guys just get less resistance, excuses, tests, games, etc. Key word is less.

OP, you might not be that attractive. Sorry. Understand that words don't mean sh*t. Judge by actions. A woman can tell a man he's handsome or whatever, but handsome my ass if she flakes or plays games. Or you just so happen to be running into a lot of attention wh0res.

Case closed.

Im not saying I look like a greek god, but I get called good looking on the reg and I have worked for abercrombie before.

 

[floydb25]

Yes, definitely watch for AW's and tease types. As well as stuck up bishes.

But honestly, a lot of has to do with the vibes you're giving off. If you act too beta, weak, or "nice" - you will NOT be respected for it. Hot girls have high standards and look for the cream of the crop - because they can, and don't have to settle for ****. If they KNOW they can flake, manipulate, play games, and you'll sit there and tolerate it - they will NOT respect you, and quite possibly even treat you like hell - because they can. They also look at how other people are treating you, since they have a herd mentality and follow "the crowd". Since many of them are b!tches - they won't mind playing games and messing with your head forever. Some of the more crazy / abusive ones even get off on it - or otherwise being the bully and controlling one for a change. Gotta watch for this ****. Not a lot of trophy types are very nice.

If you come off as shy, weak, insecure, gentle, desperate, etc - expect this kind of treatment from most hotties (and some others). People know when they can get away with poor treatment and behavior.

Then, like Nismo said, some girls won't be into you - but WILL feign interest if they want sex, attention, favors, or whatever. Gotta watch for this, too. Again, high class bishes categorize people all the time - which is why most of them have so many "guy friends". Since they don't think before they speak - they'll even TELL you that all these chumps are being used for whatever service they provide. While you're off thinking you're a special cookie because they want the D - they're using and playing your ass, too. :kick:

 

[skinnyguy]

If I were good looking I would have no problem with women. That's really my only issue. I'm really good at talking to them but most of them won't even give me the chance because of my looks and my race. Basically, if you put Tom Cruise's face on me I would be the Messiah.

 

[foreverAFC]

If you come off as shy, weak, insecure, gentle, desperate, etc - expect this kind of treatment from most hotties (and some others). People know when they can get away with poor treatment and behavior.

if you naturally have some of these qualities, then what is the answer to this?

 

[floydb25]

When I read your opening post, your title no longer makes sense. You're a "good-looking guy" and you (by your own admission) get rejected. So, of course you're not immune to it.

I think the more important question is, are girls showing interest and approaching - THEN rejecting after some time... or just flat out rejecting? Because, if a girl is into you - she WILL show very high, immediate interest. The more attractive you are - the more of this you will receive. Bishes will always be flirting and wanting to be around you. Games will be kept to a minimum - ESPECIALLY if you maintain the prize frame.

Now, if you act like a complete dumbass (like me) - none of them will REMAIN interested, and probably wish you'd die. But even hotties will become infatuated, show extreme interest, etc in the beginning. They get crushes and fall head over heels, too. At least for a time - their interest will be sky high. It just changes / depletes.

EDIT: Reached post count / going to bed.

The solution is to eliminate those traits, fAFC. You don't have to be an assh0le or act aggressive... hell, you can even be sweet and "light". But you can't be weak, afraid, and insecure... and there's no reason to be.

Agree 500% with zinc.

 

[zinc4]

If you aren't that outgoing or assertive acting or come off as shy or passive and/or fail to build any connections than yeah.....looks can only do so much.....

They will go after the socially dominant and or naturally assertive/aggressive guy every time.....

Fortunately, for me, despite being naturally shy and very laid back, i am very sexually aggressive and get heated very easily, sexually or angered...so I don't usually come off as weak and i am not weak....but it doesn't take much for a woman to deem you as weak...sometimes just being passive in social situations you will be written off as weak...and it won't matter how good looking you are if she thinks you are weak....you will be kicked to the curb in no time...and when on woman deems you as such, you better believe her sheepish shallow friends are all going to follow her mindset......

Seriously, women are the biggest sheep on the planet and love to project their insecurities and weaknesses onto you or others in general (mainly guys) if they can sense anything resembling insecurity or weakness....and they even do it other women as well quit often.......

 

[NewJack]

if you naturally have some of these qualities, (shy, weak, insecure, desperate) then what is the answer to this?

The answer is to have the boldness of mind to reframe these qualities as positives, and to work with them in a positive light, until by they are gradually transformed into positive qualities. Instead of condemning yourself for having them and trying to pretend these realities away, or to outgrow them through discipline, which is what many will advise you to do.

Basically you can build a shell of fake personality, pretending to be cool, or you can own all these traits, and be the real you. If you take the second route, the traits will gradually transform into traits which everyone views as positive. They will become sparkling facets of a well-developed personality that people cherish and that some women will desire.
This will not happen overnight, it will take a while to find your specific groove. However, once decided upon, success is inevitable.

These traits that were mentioned - "shyness", "weakness", "insecurity", "desperation" - are transformed largely by the attitude you take towards them. They will end up being transformed into the exact traits that make a man irresistible. "Shyness" and "weakness" becomes 'vulnerability/honesty/openness'. "Desperation" and "insecurity" become 'ecstatic excitement' and that becomes 'boldness' and 'desire'. If you are willing to share them honestly with others and not pretend to be otherwise, they will transform. If you can just not hate yourself, in the beginning, when things are awkward, the process will be getting started.

You are an emotional human being. Not a character from a movie or a rock-and-roll stereotype. The more you can bring of yourself, including the awkward parts, including the quirky parts, including even the shame and fear (although its best to work on these in your own personal space so you can diminish their hold on your psyche) - all these things will make you that 'real' guy whose realness makes him intensely desired. Many people are cool, and can 'front' in ways that get other people interested, but if you follow this path, you will be able to share yourself in such a way that people don't have to pretend to be interested, because they will be interested, and you won't have to work to appear interesting, because you will be interesting. From that point forward many things take care of themselves.

 

[Jariel]

A lot of good looking guys (myself included) neglect our game. We get too complacent, thinking our looks is all we need to attract women and keep them attracted, and yet we fail to keep the challenge going and fail to maintain a woman's interest.

One of my biggest problems is that my personality and behaviour has been inconsistent with my looks. I'm a tall, muscular guy and I look like a bit of a badass and women expect me to be a bold and dominant man, maybe with a touch of badboy...and yet I can sometimes be too soft and sensitive or a bit awkward.

I have to keep reconditioning myself to think like a badass and compose myself.

 

[soulforge]

A lot of good looking guys (myself included) neglect our game. We get too complacent, thinking our looks is all we need to attract women and keep them attracted, and yet we fail to keep the challenge going and fail to maintain a woman's interest.

One of my biggest problems is that my personality and behaviour has been inconsistent with my looks. I'm a tall, muscular guy and I look like a bit of a badass and women expect me to be a bold and dominant man, maybe with a touch of badboy...and yet I can sometimes be too soft and sensitive or a bit awkward.

I have to keep reconditioning myself to think like a badass and compose myself.

that is my weakness too jariel... when i fall for a woman, i become softer & more sensative & sometimes awkard too.. when i don't care much for a woman, i,ve been told i am like a f@cking rock

my ex tried to crack me for over a year... she got knowhere.. in the end, she dumped me because i did not give a f@ck...

i never kissed her ass, chased, showed much effection... or spent too much time with her.. she only had a small part of me & we got on better

just like you jariel, after she dumped me for not opening myslef upto her... i changed my ways & became more loving & caring etc etc

and thats when the b@tch got her claws into me... it seems like i could not win either

the tables where turned on us, when we started caring!

 

[Jariel]

Something I find very interesting is that the week that my girlfriend broke up with me she emphasizing how hot I was looking and said she couldn't stop fantasizing about me.

But it didn't stop her from dumping me. While she was still very attracted to me physically, I'd become too much of a "nice guy" and she just wasn't feeling the psychological and emotional attraction any more.

Another interesting thing is that many of my exes and girls I dated have left me for guys who are not particularly good looking, some may even say average or ugly. Everyone who knows them can't believe they'd leave a guy who looks like me for someone like that...and yet it makes perfect sense when you know how attraction works. These guys obviously provide more of a challenge, show more self worth and have better game than I did.

that is my weakness too jariel... when i fall for a woman, i become softer & more sensative & sometimes awkard too.. when i don't care much for a woman, i,ve been told i am like a f@cking rock

the tables where turned on us, when we started caring!

I think it's more about changing than caring. I cared for my girlfriend a lot early on, I was head over heels in love with her, but I retained my identity and she loved me for who I was. It was when I changed and started trying too hard and trying to become the guy she thought she wanted that things started falling apart.

We lost sight of our identities mate. We stopped being free thinking individuals and sold out to try and keep our gfs.

 

[Who Dares Win]

Nobody is immune to sh1t tests, flaking or mind fvcking but from my own experience and observation of others I can say for sure that good looking guys get the basic package while the average guys get the full package of crap women can provide.

A good looking guy hitting on a girl hardly gets the creepy responce, hardly gets problem getting her friend approval and so on.

A good looking guy with just barely decent game will do much better than a short fat guy with good game also because before spitting any game you need at least to girl to listen and looking at you which not always happens if you dont pass the look test.

Plus there is the snowball effect which begin when u get the first positive responce from girls, so your self confidence increase which helps you to get more and so on...its proven that good looking people gets special treatment from school and gets paid more for the same job which lead to better attitude and less stress which again help you to score even more.

Game is like a pilot, it can makes the difference as long as the car grants some decent performances, the best pilot in the world cant drive a car with no fuel.

The only sh1t test reserved for good looking guys are the ones from other good looking girls to check if they are serious or just looking for a easy lay, but in the end they open themselves very likely.

 

[OldGoat]

Good looking wont protect you from anything. Violence, rejection, disapproval, hostility, threats, danger, etc. Its a waste of time to be after women because theyre always be a bigger and better deal. imo

 

[corrector]

Something I find very interesting is that the week that my girlfriend broke up with me she emphasizing how hot I was looking and said she couldn't stop fantasizing about me.

But it didn't stop her from dumping me. While she was still very attracted to me physically, I'd become too much of a "nice guy" and she just wasn't feeling the psychological and emotional attraction any more.

This is just your luck, I guess, eh? The way we are wired. Either to be nice people, or to be bad boys.

Another interesting thing is that many of my exes and girls I dated have left me for guys who are not particularly good looking, some may even say average or ugly. Everyone who knows them can't believe they'd leave a guy who looks like me for someone like that...and yet it makes perfect sense when you know how attraction works. These guys obviously provide more of a challenge, show more self worth and have better game than I did.

Wow. Some people's realities really have to suck. Maybe it's just your luck with women that this happens or you are not as good looking as Who Dear Win's wingman.

I think it's more about changing than caring. I cared for my girlfriend a lot early on, I was head over heels in love with her, but I retained my identity and she loved me for who I was. It was when I changed and started trying too hard and trying to become the guy she thought she wanted that things started falling apart.

We lost sight of our identities mate. We stopped being free thinking individuals and sold out to try and keep our gfs.

Yeah, so you are the type that has oneitis, falls for one girl. But if your looks are getting you into relationships in the first place, then you shouldn't care if you break-up since there is another one around the corner.

Isn't that how reality is like with you being a "good looking" guy?

 

[floydb25]

Same experiences here, Jariel. It's all lust and infatuation that makes them go crazy... for a time. IME, nobody lasted with certain women, so it didn't really matter what or who you were. So long as you're dealing with a shallow, selfish bish - there's NO chance of remaining together for years and years.

Not a lot of people are LTR material.

 

[Stagger Lee]

While all of these things are true generally, in your specific case you were dealing with a trashy woman. I would focus more on that. Some women cheat and leave because they want to leave and they are fcked in the head, and who they leave with is simply incidental to that. And the flattery before and even in the midst of dumping you is a common tactic.

Good point and I was thinking the same. We don't really know completely why any girls leaves and whether if you had displayed different game and behavior that it would've really made a difference. The guy she left you for may or may not be as good looking, and game wise he may or may not be a bigger "AFC" than you were being. She might leave him in less time than it took with you.

I do think you can take either the "jerk" or "AFC" thing too far and that personality matters more for LTRs, but let's face it the female's personality matters even more in regard to her staying. Best thing you can do here game-wise is to recognize what kind of woman you are dealing with and to not try to girlfriend or wife up an undependable ho.