tafakna said:
Just avoid a major mistake:
Just because you're willing to become friends, doesn't mean that you can be less of a man. It just means that you will not screw them, but you absolutely must behave like a man.
You're not going to open yourself, show your softer side or all that BS. You can lend her a friendly ear, but don't go pouring your own feelings. You must have the same self-respect you would if you're dating this girls.
By doing that, they will often fall for you, but you will command respect by keeping at a friendly basis. They will have physical attraction to you, be puzzled by why you nail all her female friends but not her, but simply to take the relationship any further than that.
This will boost your self-esteem, make them do a PR job for you, and make you more desirable.
To make the point clear: your goal is to have female friends because YOU decide not to pursue things further, not because they can't see you as a real man.
All very true, you know what's going on. DON'T SLEEP WITH THEM EVEN IF THEY BLATANTLY TRY.
THEY WILL RESPECT YOU FOR IT IF YOU'RE A MAN IN GENERAL AND CONSISTENT.
More comments in general for the thread: In fact, it's excellent "practice" because by treating her just like all other women (those who treat me with respect), she will be interested and will try to probe around to figure out why I won't move to the next level. I don't explain it, that's pointless and actually will upset her because she'll be thinking "mysterious very rarely explains why he does or doesn't do things to anyone, is he afraid to tell me I'm just not attractive enough or there's something wrong with me, etc..". So, I don't bother to explain and they always get over it by picking something in their own mind that'll make them feel ok.
When a man is doing it right and she SEES HIM AS A TRUE MAN, HB friend will at least try to half-assed seduce at some point when she's single...that's normal. He should just ignore it AND/OR bust her on it a bit depending on what she does. A good example is that if a guy goes to HB friends house to watch some movies, and she selects a few from the video store, it's absolutely critical to watch for the common theme in those movies, everything women do is for a reason. For instance, I was at an HB friends house and she said "I picked out some movies and I got you a comedy too, you want to watch some?" I said "sure" but as I was glancing through the 3 movies she got, they all were about close friends who had sex and then found out they were "meant" for each other. One of them was "Zack and Miri Make a Porno"
I busted her on it just a little bit and she claimed the movies were all randomly selected.....women rarely randomly select movies like guys will. I didn't push the point even though three movies about friends having sex together is a bit obvious. Guys in general don't pay attention to details so girls will do "obvious to girls but not guys" stuff like that a lot.
But, in that same situation, if she were wearing seductive clothes, I'd just ignore it. After all, she's a friend and if I mention that she's wearing sexy clothes then that means I'm thinking about her in sexy clothes from a woman's viewpoint no matter how innocuous the comment I make seems. It will encourage her to try more.
Girlfriends like that are excellent external mirrors for my behavior as a man. When I'm around other women, if, for instance, I were to allow some other girl some sort of behavior that I wouldn't allow my (girl)friend to do (supplicating, trying to impress, other AFC stuff), it'll be extremely obvious because her behavior/attitude will instantly change.
Good HB friends are like smoke detectors for any slips into AFC behavior. As they get to know you better their radar gets more precise and they'll be very sensitive to any behavior that isn't congruent and consistent with all of your interactions with them.
EDIT: I should add a curious side-effect when having HB friends around while I'm talking to other girls. It causes me to even be more sexually calm than I've trained myself to be. It's because even if an HB10 is talking to me or a stripper,
I know in my mind that I could sweep the HB friend next to me off of her feet and into bed at a moment's notice any time I choose....but I have the self-control not to so the "random" HB10 talking to me doesn't have any effect at all, she's just another girl. Other girls radar picks up the fact that there is sexual tension somehow between me and HB friend and I'm absolutely convinced it turns them on and gets more women curious and attracted to me.
