approach anxiety.. kinda.. creepy vibe

[pete101]

i think i kind of have approach anxiety although it never stops me from actually approaching.. just delays it.. this problem leads me to linger a bit before i make a move which i think creeps them out.

how do i avoid being creepy if i suffer from this kind of approach anxiety?

usually i need a few seconds to steady myself and mentally prepare to approach but then i linger and that creeps them out then i approach and it goes south from there. i haven't been able to shake this for years.

 

[sylvester the cat]

i'm usually terrible at approaching unless i've had a drink. the other day i went into a random bar to use their toilet and ended up buying a drink (i was already pretty hammered).

whilst outside smoking a cigarette i got talking to a girl. i just struck up conversation with her which is something i would never do whilst sober.

it was perfectly natural. i was talking about how i'd never seen this bar before etc and the converstion flowed onto what she did for a living and how tall she was. we compared heights and even though she was about the same height as me (5'11) she insisted she was taller which made for some fun.

as she left i asked her, her name, she said Amelia. i didnt push for her number because the vibe i got was she wasn't interested as she didnt ask me my name.

luckily for me i don't appear drunk when i've been drinking, just ultra sociable. i would like to be able to do this sober.

 

[powpow]

hey man its ok to be nervous! that is your thousands of years of proper evolution telling you to be careful.

but look, you need to get over it.

and, the only way to get over it is to practice practice until your mind and soul realizes that you will not be crushed by some hulking ogre dude with a rock if you fail.

youre in a beautiful time right now, the time when you still get nervous to approach women. enjoy this time, its really exciting. youll be so happy when you succeed, and be able to learn so much from when you dont.

just keep practicing and it will come to you