Anyone good at deciphering women?

[Gar Lark See]

Hi all,

I'm a long time reader....haven't been on here for long time though...just nice to check in every now and then.

I have a problem with a girl I'm friendly with and could use some input from the long-timers on here.

Girl I know, same age as me, has boyfriend. We happen to work together (I know, I know) I spent far too long a few years ago chasing girls with boyfriends only to be mucked around, now I pretty much don't bother.

However...

This particular girl seems overly keen. She has asked me out to two lunch dates now, I accepted out of friendship for now, and she paid once (she offered) and I paid the second time for the meal. All good. I think she could well like me, she is suggestive at times about the two of us being together, sometimes makes dirty innuendos etc...

Issues I have with her:

1. Boyfriend. Obviously. They aren't getting on well at the moment from what I've heard through her mate.

2. Communication. If I text her on a weekend / evening, no reply. Randomly I might get a reply once a week, but the rest of the time, no reply. Ask her later and she was always "asleep, busy or not with her phone".

What's the balance here? Asking me out to lunch, paying....but then no communciation.

My instinct is that she's playing me along as a backup in case things go wrong with her boyfriend.

Agree / disagree/ Any other opinions?

Cheers dudes

 

[Omni]

My instinct is that she's playing me along as a backup in case things go wrong with her boyfriend.

Yup.

Even if she breaks up with her bf, don't date her; she'd have a new backup guy ready to replace YOU in no time, and you have too much self-respect to be with a woman like that... right?

 

[Phyzzle]

You haven't written anything here to indicate that she's keen. So she bought you lunch? Doesn't mean much.

She doesn't like to touch you or see to you when work is over?

 

[SeldomSeen]

Re:

she doesnt reply on the weekends because she's probably with her man.


Leave her be, keep your distance from this one. You'll just drive yourself crazy going back and forth. You're going to end up becoming her girlfriend ie her shoulder to lean on because she is having problems with her man. I'd find some other chicks to date and just keep your friendship with her on a work basis.

 

[upsidedownside7]

Yes, she's playing backup.

If you want to get with this girl, you're going to have to make a move. Not just asking her out and just sitting there. IMO this is a risky situation you're getting yourself into but it's your life.

The real question you should be asking yourself is why are you courting a woman with a boyfriend? Sounds to like you're minimizing your risk. If a girl with a boyfriend rejects your advances, that doesn't say much about you. If a girl without a boyfriend rejects your advances, then that does.

 

[flexion_]

What's the balance here? Asking me out to lunch, paying....but then no communciation.

My instinct is that she's playing me along as a backup in case things go wrong with her boyfriend.

Agree / disagree/ Any other opinions?

I think she is just a work colleague - thats about it.

 

[Krassus]

My instinct is that she's playing me along as a backup in case things go wrong with her boyfriend.

Your instinct is correct, sir Now, go find a single chick!

 

[Gar Lark See]

Fair points, fair points.

Maybe I just needed other people to tell me to not be a d1ck and move on!

Cheers for the input guys