Anyone been in this situation before? (shy/untalkative girls)

[Climax]

Today myself and a few buddies were talking about our "love lifes" and the thing that seemed to bother most of the guys is that they try having a decent conversation with a girl, and they SEE that she is interested, she even TELLS them that she is interested, but whenever they talk to the girl in person her answers are short and uninteresting... And its hard to keep up a good convo when the girl is giving you 1 or 2 word answers and NOT making any conversation herself.

Any of you been in that situation? (you like a girl, and she likes you back, but when trying to speak to her you keep on running into those arkward silences) ... let me know about YOUR experiances reguarding this topic


Laterz...

 

[Julian]

Yeah it means she is boring and if im not boning her within the next half hour im leaving to do more interesting things.

 

[Climax]

umm....

Originally posted by Julian
Yeah it means she is boring and if im not boning her within the next half hour im leaving to do more interesting things.

I am not asking what you would do... and just for the record, i dissagree with your way of thinking... because if like i said in my original post "you like the chick" and "she likes you" then by just moving on to do other things is not solving your problem, but rather running away from it and/or avoiding it...

... Now what i am asking is for advice on how to "fix: this sort of thing WITHOUT running away from it/avoiding it... any idea's/thoghts? ... Thanx...


laterz...

 

[Life-Trainee]

Ask follow up questions to the short reponses to elaborate on the topic? That's what I would do.

 

[Climax]

i dont fully understand what u are saying...

Originally posted by Life-Trainee
Ask follow up questions to the short reponses to elaborate on the topic? That's what I would do.

Could you perhaps explain urself in more detail? and maybe give an example or 2?

thanx...


Laterz...

 

[Life-Trainee]

For example, you ask her opinion of Thai food and she says "It's good" and you instantly run into the awkward silence right? Ask her followup questions on that boring answer to get details that you initially wanted from her response. Which aspect of Thai food she likes. Any particular Thai restaurants that she prefers or been to. Relate your own experiences with Thai food and restaurants. Give an example of question that you get boring answers to including the answers.

 

[Climax]

I have never had this problem... why are they having it?

Originally posted by Life-Trainee
For example, you ask her opinion of Thai food and she says "It's good" and you instantly run into the awkward silence right? Ask her followup questions on that boring answer to get details that you initially wanted from her response. Which aspect of Thai food she likes. Any particular Thai restaurants that she prefers or been to. Relate your own experiences with Thai food and restaurants. Give an example of question that you get boring answers to including the answers.

oh ok.. i see what you mean... yeah... that IS a possibility... But what i am looking for is how to make HER talk more.

With ME and "shy/untalkative" girls i always try to be a little funny, make them laugh, and make them feel comfortable around me, and they normally start talking more etc.... but i guess its not that easy for others? I tried telling them (my friends) to just make them (the shuy/untalkative) laugh and start feeling comfortable around them, but apparently thats not enough? hmmm.... So do you have any idea's on how to make HER talk more?

Let me know


Laterz...

 

[Cheatz]

I was in this exact situation at the start of this month. This girl was almost obsessive about me, yet she showed no interest or body language that could take it to the next step. What happened with us? I got impatient and a bit pissed off so I started bagging here. But that didn't turn out well... ah well.

 

[Life-Trainee]

Re: I have never had this problem... why are they having it?

Originally posted by ~ªêQµïTª$~
oh ok.. i see what you mean... yeah... that IS a possibility... But what i am looking for is how to make HER talk more.

With ME and "shy/untalkative" girls i always try to be a little funny, make them laugh, and make them feel comfortable around me, and they normally start talking more etc.... but i guess its not that easy for others? I tried telling them (my friends) to just make them (the shuy/untalkative) laugh and start feeling comfortable around them, but apparently thats not enough? hmmm.... So do you have any idea's on how to make HER talk more?

Let me know


Laterz...

Next step would probably be teasing her about the shortness of her answers. Say something like "Now, answer this question with minimum of 25 words". Some people just are not very expressive at first. With time as they get more comfortable around you they'll open up further. I used to be like that.

 

[I-am-someone]

Yeah... you've just got to work up to her feeling familiar with you... basically you need to have some connection with the girl to be able to talk with her freely.
I do agree though, there are a lot of girls that just keep on creating awkward silences, despite of the fact that you know they really dig you. Next time I see that happen I'll start testing some stuff out and - if I remember to - I'll post something back here

 

[thefonz]

i have more experince with these types of girls than any other.......what i do is i pretty much go into my own world if i'm on a date or something, just start asking question after question until you find something that clicks....ignore her passiveness and ALWAYS give yourself credit periodically on the night reminding yourself thatyour trying harder than her. Sometimes it takes focus to not focus on her shyness. Find something in the room that reminds you of a story, tell it......if that doesn't work just start ranting about your opinions on things, "That guy over there is hasn't stopped taping his leg the whole night, i'm gonna ask him if he wants to jam out with my chopsticks" You don't have to nessecarily joke but pretty much just thinking out loud should warm you up to her.....if she's of sound state she should start to mimic your behaviors and start letting off tidbits of information to work on, and with that find common ground to start interest