Another one bites the dust; I date 'em, the next guy marries them

[STR8UP]

This CAN'T be a coincidence.....

I might have posted about this before, the fact that 3 of the 4 LTR's I have had in my life got married soon after we broke up.

Well the other day I just found out that another chick I dated last year is getting married. To the guy she started seeing while she was still seeing me.

Funny thing is, I can only remember one out of the five being particularly anxious to get married. Weird.

 

[Last Man Standing]

All hors eventually want to get married - time is against them!!!! Only fools marry a sperm-filled hor!!

 

[blueguy]

All hors eventually want to get married - time is against them!!!! Only fools marry a sperm-filled hor!!

rofl.

I don't know why your posts still make me laugh.

To str8up, a question. Could it possibly be that they secretly wanted to get married to you but did not bring it up (to not burden you)?

I say this because this is how girls act when you act DJ.

However when you tell them how you feel about them, lovey dovey, etc., if they have intentions of wanting to marry you, they bring it out.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Brother,

I can see what's going on. You're the guy they WANT to marry but it's readily apparent you're not into settling down and filling out paperwork. Thusly, they go and find Mr. AFC to shack up with and burden down with thier monotony.

Reframe it as a complete blessing. You get to enjoy them in body and mind then send them off to be kept by another. I don't think you're down and out about it and I'm sure it's not cramping your style.

Once thier shine wears off what's truly left anyway?

 

[Last Man Standing]

rofl.

I don't know why your posts still make me laugh.

It is because the blunt structure of my wording and the truthful message that it conveys - reality expressed in a super-expressive form - punctuated by exclamation points!!!!

 

[Wyldfire]

This CAN'T be a coincidence.....

I might have posted about this before, the fact that 3 of the 4 LTR's I have had in my life got married soon after we broke up.

Well the other day I just found out that another chick I dated last year is getting married. To the guy she started seeing while she was still seeing me.

Funny thing is, I can only remember one out of the five being particularly anxious to get married. Weird.

You've got a typo somewhere...first you said 3 out of 4 and then one out of five. Anywho...

I don't think this is a good sign. While so far the guys are assuming that they really wanted to marry you but just married the next guy. That's not usually what women do. If they want to marry someone they are with they don't start seeing another guy while still seeing him, as the last one did. The fact that so many have married the very next guy they are with would imply to me that they didn't view you as someone they would want to marry for some reason. If it was really that they thought you were such an awesome catch then they would not have married someone else.

I don't think I'd stick this in the victory column so fast...especially if most of the women broke up with you or did as the last one did and started seeing someone else while seeing you. If most of your LTRs leave you and marry the next man they get involved with then you are doing something wrong in LTRs.

 

[STR8UP]

You've got a typo somewhere...first you said 3 out of 4 and then one out of five. Anywho...

I said I might have posted about the 3 out of 4 in the past, then the other day I found out about #5.

 

[Wyldfire]

I said I might have posted about the 3 out of 4 in the past, then the other day I found out about #5.

So the last one (the 5th) was a LTR too then? I just want to make sure of the context of that relationship before I point out something I noticed in your original post that might be a contributing factor to why this is happening. Not trying to be a biotch here...just trying to help.

 

[blueguy]

just because they started seeing another guy while seeing st8up does not mean they had low interest levels in him. If they felt the relationship wasnt progressing, naturally they're going to look for the provider who will go out of his way to take care of them. It's happened to me too. Married the next guy. But the difference about the next guy is that he was much more accomidating to her needs. And she was leading that relationship (she brought up marriage first to him, etc.) She had control in the relatonship, which is also unfortunate for the guy in many ways. If you are leading the relationship, she expects you to bring it up or lead it to that. If you dont, she quickly looks for the next guy since her biological clock is ticking.

 

[speed dawg]

Depends on why the relationship ended. Who ended them? If they were cheating on you, they sure didn't want to marry you. That's DJ common sense 101 right there. Don't kid yourself.

Str8up you're a good poster, been around awhile. I don't intend to sound insulting or flaming. If YOU dropped THEM, then we have a whole other scenario completely.

 

[joekerr31]

this is happening because str8up doesn't want to settle down. he's having too much fun bouncing around all over the place. women know / sense this.

i wouldn't be surprised if in most of these scenarios str8up provided these women with that last 'wild' itch that they had to scratch.

after taking jello shots up the *ss and squirting bananas out their p*ssy with str8up they figure they've got it out of their system. they then focus on marriage and start lookign for a stable guy while also changing how they behave to being more refined with a focus on building an emotional bond as opposed to primarily sexual.

none of this is a problem unless str8up wants to get married. if he wants to get married then he needs to change his game up a bit - project a different vibe to the world around him so as to attract a different kind of woman, and then focus on the emotional bonding as opposed to sexual.

 

[Wyldfire]

just because they started seeing another guy while seeing st8up does not mean they had low interest levels in him. If they felt the relationship wasnt progressing, naturally they're going to look for the provider who will go out of his way to take care of them. It's happened to me too. Married the next guy. But the difference about the next guy is that he was much more accomidating to her needs. And she was leading that relationship (she brought up marriage first to him, etc.) She had control in the relatonship, which is also unfortunate for the guy in many ways. If you are leading the relationship, she expects you to bring it up or lead it to that. If you dont, she quickly looks for the next guy since her biological clock is ticking.

Ironic that you mention "leading the relationship". I'm talking about this on the cheating thread. You should go read it...

 

[speed dawg]

just because they started seeing another guy while seeing st8up does not mean they had low interest levels in him. If they felt the relationship wasnt progressing, naturally they're going to look for the provider who will go out of his way to take care of them. It's happened to me too. Married the next guy. But the difference about the next guy is that he was much more accomidating to her needs. And she was leading that relationship (she brought up marriage first to him, etc.) She had control in the relatonship, which is also unfortunate for the guy in many ways. If you are leading the relationship, she expects you to bring it up or lead it to that. If you dont, she quickly looks for the next guy since her biological clock is ticking.

Bring up marriage to a chick and see how fast she runs, I don't care who you are. You won't have to worry about a biological clock.

 

[blueguy]

The context in which you speak of leading the relationship in that thread implies that you mean directing individual aspects of your significant other's behavior rather than havng the upper hand in the relationship as a whole. I dont see behavior conditioning s a problem and in fact it is necessary on the part of the woman if she wants to mantain some power in the relationship. However, I do not believe women should lead the relationship as a whole as it directly conflicts the man's ability to make tactful decisions to provide.

And I still disagree with the poster who said that a girl will not cheat on a man she is highly interested in but who gives off vibes of not wanting her long term. It is in their very nature to look for a provider, and they would do the same to brad pitt even if he was only there for them some of the time. I have seen way too many examples of this.

 

[STR8UP]

So the last one (the 5th) was a LTR too then? I just want to make sure of the context of that relationship before I point out something I noticed in your original post that might be a contributing factor to why this is happening. Not trying to be a biotch here...just trying to help.

No, the last one wasn't even my girlfriend, just a casual relationship but we dated for several months. Incidentally, when I met her it was a few months after she had broken up with a 4 or 6 year b/f.

 

[STR8UP]

just because they started seeing another guy while seeing st8up does not mean they had low interest levels in him. If they felt the relationship wasnt progressing, naturally they're going to look for the provider who will go out of his way to take care of them.

This sounds pretty accurate, based upon my amateur self analysis of the situation(s).

It's happened to me too. Married the next guy. But the difference about the next guy is that he was much more accomidating to her needs. And she was leading that relationship (she brought up marriage first to him, etc.) She had control in the relatonship, which is also unfortunate for the guy in many ways. If you are leading the relationship, she expects you to bring it up or lead it to that. If you dont, she quickly looks for the next guy since her biological clock is ticking.

Pretty much dead on.

I remember seeing one of them with the new guy a few months after the breakup, and he looked like he was following her around like a puppy dog.

Another one I know married a nerdy high school math teacher.

The last one...same story. I don't know the guy but from what I gather it seems like he's more into her than she is into him.

My guess is that they ALL want to get married ASAP, whether they express it or not. The relationships go so far and the women figure out that it ain't happening (with me anyway), so they move on to an easier target who is itching to settle down.

Yes, most of these women broke up with me. Not that I was being particularly AFC and kissing ass or whatnot, but I was settled into a comfort zone where there was no progression.

 

[STR8UP]

And I still disagree with the poster who said that a girl will not cheat on a man she is highly interested in but who gives off vibes of not wanting her long term. It is in their very nature to look for a provider, and they would do the same to brad pitt even if he was only there for them some of the time. I have seen way too many examples of this.

Women have the capacity to cheat whenever it is in their self interest to do so.

If you are a month or two into the relationship and she's REALLY into you, chances are it won't happen. But get past that year mark and things change. If a woman reaches that point in a relationship and she doesn't see progress, she is likely to start looking around for other options. EVEN if she's still into you, she is driven subconsciously to seek out a long term provider.

 

[Cesare Cardinali]

The way I see it, I only want to date really high quality women. Women that I genuinly want to be with, that I care about, and that are really worth getting to know and being with. And under that framework, such a woman will also be in demand on the market and should not stay single (or even be single when I meet her). So it wouldn't surprise me at all to discover that a high quality ex has gone off and gotten married after me. If instead she was indefinately single after me, a total loser, then I would think there is something wrong with her, and that my assessment of her was not accurate.

In any event, the important thing here is that you are manifesting relationships that are congruent with what you want in the long term. All this stuff about women cheating if given the chance, and them always looking for the provider. I honestely don't think that's true. People are definately motivated to an extent on self interest; however, values and ethics also enter into the picture and a girl who values ethical behavior, honesty, and trust, will not cheat.

 

[grinder]

after taking jello shots up the *ss and squirting bananas out their p*ssy with str8up they figure they've got it out of their system.

Well I’ll be goddammed: joekerr31 just combined the meaning of life threads and the quality woman threads…..at least for me, anyhow….

I’m sure STR8UP knows he could easily be “captured” and marry in about 12.5 seconds if he allowed it.

Getting married is unfortunately disturbingly easy.

It actually takes balls to NOT get married.

 

[Hitman10000]

All hors eventually want to get married - time is against them!!!! Only fools marry a sperm-filled hor!!

Makes sense, if you were an employer. Would you want to hire someone who has been in more than a dozen jobs in the past 10 years? Or would you hire someone whose been in a couple in the past 10 years?