InLawsHateMe
Master Don Juan
I consider myself a pretty chilled person... it would take a lot of effort to piss me off, then again, there are days when I've been pushed to that threshold, with just a c*nt hair from blowing my top. It also seems that if I do blow my top, for that brief moment, anything is possible. It's like I've been given a free ticket to hurt someone and make things right, which fills me up with joy, then it hits me, I can't just do what I want unless I'm ready to sit in jail.... or can I?
Yesterday was nice, up until I took my pregnant gf to lunch. She asked me if her 15 year old brother could join us, I said sure, putting my hatred for the little sh*thead aside. He's not just 15.. he's 15 year old, standing at about 6'2, with the brain of a damn gerbel. Every chance this dumb motherf*cker gets, he tries to step up to me. Obviously, he ain't nothing but a b*tch, since all he could do is talk. What makes things more frustrating is, I usually bite my tongue, while he opens his big mouth, I do this out of respect for her, and her family members. I've mentioned this to her, and her only reply is usually, 'He's 15 years old.... he's no different than any other 15 year olds.' .........like I said, I get to that threshold.... so yesterday we're getting lunch at some fast food place. I hand over some bills, but never got my change... well, after standing there for 15 minutes debating about my change with the management. There I was, remaining cool, as the management peeps called me a thief, in their own words. After some more BS, I get my change. I go back to my seat, hot from standing up there for 15 minutes, charged as a thief. I sit down, and my gf goes, 'How did this $10 bill get in my purse?' Sh*t happends, she grabbed my change, but because she's burnt, forgot about it. Again, sh*t happends, I walked back up, told them what happend, apologized, gave them back a $10, walked back to my seat only to have my seat pushed away from the table as the two ingrates were playing chair games. On the edge at this moment, I said 'Can a brother get a f*ckin break here? All I want to do is have some lunch.' At this point, her brother snaps at me with something like, 'DAMN! WHAT'S THE BIG F*CKIN' DEAL?!' ...that was it, I couldn't keep it down any longer. I returned with 'Look here you little piece of sh*t, no one asked you to open your f*ckin mouth!' he then calls me a 'f*ckface'... I tripped out, shoved his luch in his lap, then told him simply what I've been wanting to tell him for a long time, and was finally going to get my wish.. I said, 'That's it, I'm kicking your ass!' ...all I can think about at that very moment was, what a beautiful day today was, and I will finally get to put his lights out and leave my mark on hit for the rest of his entire life.
...as I'm walking out just half-way out the door, I couldn't wait, I turned around to begin my attack on his 'now, I'm a bit concerned' ass, only to be blocked by her sister, my gf. She said, 'You will not touch him.' at that moment, I felt great sadness, that I wasn't going to be allowed that free ticket to hurt. Then it all slowly came back to me... as low as that piece of sh*t is, I was about to destroy him, along with my relationship with my gf, and her family, not even mentioning the fact, I could end up in jail. As my anger calmed down, I asked myself, is there something wrong with me? Why is it that I'm so chilled all the time, but when I'm pushed to the point, my anger is so strong? I mean, I've watched that little punk throw a fit when commercials interupts his shows, and then to have him patronize me like that?! Who the f*ck does he think he is?
It seems that when her and I have problems, it stems from that little prick. I've done too much for him, for his dumb ass to treat me like that. At this point, I don't want thanks yous... I want restitution.... What it boils down is to this....
Is there anything I can do, or take, or read.... to overcome this rage when it occurs? I'm affraid I'm going to black out one time, and seriously hurt him. I've never hurt anyone in my life, that didn't ask for it first. God forbid, I would never hurt my gf, but my anger, when pushed to the limit is ugly.
Please help....
Yesterday was nice, up until I took my pregnant gf to lunch. She asked me if her 15 year old brother could join us, I said sure, putting my hatred for the little sh*thead aside. He's not just 15.. he's 15 year old, standing at about 6'2, with the brain of a damn gerbel. Every chance this dumb motherf*cker gets, he tries to step up to me. Obviously, he ain't nothing but a b*tch, since all he could do is talk. What makes things more frustrating is, I usually bite my tongue, while he opens his big mouth, I do this out of respect for her, and her family members. I've mentioned this to her, and her only reply is usually, 'He's 15 years old.... he's no different than any other 15 year olds.' .........like I said, I get to that threshold.... so yesterday we're getting lunch at some fast food place. I hand over some bills, but never got my change... well, after standing there for 15 minutes debating about my change with the management. There I was, remaining cool, as the management peeps called me a thief, in their own words. After some more BS, I get my change. I go back to my seat, hot from standing up there for 15 minutes, charged as a thief. I sit down, and my gf goes, 'How did this $10 bill get in my purse?' Sh*t happends, she grabbed my change, but because she's burnt, forgot about it. Again, sh*t happends, I walked back up, told them what happend, apologized, gave them back a $10, walked back to my seat only to have my seat pushed away from the table as the two ingrates were playing chair games. On the edge at this moment, I said 'Can a brother get a f*ckin break here? All I want to do is have some lunch.' At this point, her brother snaps at me with something like, 'DAMN! WHAT'S THE BIG F*CKIN' DEAL?!' ...that was it, I couldn't keep it down any longer. I returned with 'Look here you little piece of sh*t, no one asked you to open your f*ckin mouth!' he then calls me a 'f*ckface'... I tripped out, shoved his luch in his lap, then told him simply what I've been wanting to tell him for a long time, and was finally going to get my wish.. I said, 'That's it, I'm kicking your ass!' ...all I can think about at that very moment was, what a beautiful day today was, and I will finally get to put his lights out and leave my mark on hit for the rest of his entire life.
...as I'm walking out just half-way out the door, I couldn't wait, I turned around to begin my attack on his 'now, I'm a bit concerned' ass, only to be blocked by her sister, my gf. She said, 'You will not touch him.' at that moment, I felt great sadness, that I wasn't going to be allowed that free ticket to hurt. Then it all slowly came back to me... as low as that piece of sh*t is, I was about to destroy him, along with my relationship with my gf, and her family, not even mentioning the fact, I could end up in jail. As my anger calmed down, I asked myself, is there something wrong with me? Why is it that I'm so chilled all the time, but when I'm pushed to the point, my anger is so strong? I mean, I've watched that little punk throw a fit when commercials interupts his shows, and then to have him patronize me like that?! Who the f*ck does he think he is? It seems that when her and I have problems, it stems from that little prick. I've done too much for him, for his dumb ass to treat me like that. At this point, I don't want thanks yous... I want restitution.... What it boils down is to this....
Is there anything I can do, or take, or read.... to overcome this rage when it occurs? I'm affraid I'm going to black out one time, and seriously hurt him. I've never hurt anyone in my life, that didn't ask for it first. God forbid, I would never hurt my gf, but my anger, when pushed to the limit is ugly.
Please help....