Am I handling this right?

[juaneo]

Long story short.

Met a girl at college 3 years ago, chemistry was there, she was still with bf at the time. They split up and within 3 months we are in bed together. Then she starts being all wierd with me when her ex finds out, I turn afc and really blow it by confessing feelings for her.

Don't see her for 6 months then start hanging out together with mutual friends, by which time I have changed my ways after discovering this site. We then become quite close with lots of flirting but I don't make a move. She then moved 20 miles away about a year ago. I tell her to keep in touch but she doesn't. Well not up untill a couple of months ago when totally out of the blue on my bday I get a sweet text message off her. BTW I didn't sent her one a couple of months prior, didn't see the point.

So I phoned her about a month later, she's all happy to hear from me, so we arrange to get together, last weekend for lunch.

I arranged to meet her in a park in the center of town and I was like 2 mins late when she calls me up just to make sure I'm still meeting her, which I thought was kinda weird, I was literally 2 mins away.

So we go for lunch, seem to get on quite well, I asked her if she was single, she told me she was, but didn't ask me so I told her nothing. Looking back I was very layed back, maybe too layed back, if thats possible.

Anyway it gets time to leave and I say it was great seeing her and I hope it isn't as long as a year until we see each other again. At this point she is kinda lingering like she is waiting for me to arrange to meet again but I don't, and just say seeya. To which she seemed kinda dissapointed. I do wanna see her again soon but don't want her to think she's got me, especially after my old afc fcuk up from the past. Do you think I did the right thing here fellas ??

Am I handling this right??

 

[joekerr31]

just my view. she's not stupid dude, she knows you like her. you agreed to have lunch, you told her you hope you see her again, etc.

SHE KNOWS.

but here's where things get messed up. YOU think she doesnt have the balls to tell you how she feels. WRONG WRONG WRONG!

she wants control and she knows that the only way to have that is to lure you in and have you express your desire for her. that's why she was disappointed that you didn't take things further.

this is a very very simple situation.

she is NOT mature enough to put herself on the line and express what she is really feeling. and if she can't do that now, she won't be able to do it in a relationship either. she will ALWAYS be playing you to make the moves she wants you to make.

so the question is do you want a mature woman looking for an equal partnership, or do you just want to bang this chic. if you are ok with the games shes going to play, then call her up and make your move. otherwise next her and keep your options open.

if you want to break her game down for fun i suggest that you start treating her like a friend. tell her about women hitting on you, or how you have a date with this really interesting woman next week. whatever.

when you let them know that the house was for sale, but lots of buyers are interested in it. that's when she stops playing games and will make an offer.
J

 

[juaneo]

Cheers joe

Shyt man, sounds to me like you know this girl.

I once remember her bragging ages ago that her once long term ex was the first to express his feelings towards her.

Anyway, not made my mind up what to do with her yet as I have other prospects, but there is a catch, she is the hottest by far. Shame that with most of the real hotties there's always a catch.

 

[joekerr31]

no catch. the hot ones know they can manipulate and control men. simple as that.

think about it for a second. imagine that you could have women begging to f*ck you just by batting your eyelashes, would you? or rather would you be REAL and care about their inner soul?

women don't care about getting laid half as much as they care about being adored. being adored and wanted by a woman is like what its like for a man when women want to screw his brains out.

so they get everything their little heart desires simply by batting their eye lashes.

hb 6-8 on the hand have had a more realistic life. they know the pain of rejection. they don't get jobs handed to them because of their tits. men DO stand up to them. etc.

as a result they are willing to compromise and form a real relationship and bond.

hb 9/10 you will never ever ever get through to. they've had a life of behaviorial conditioning that has shaped the neural networks in their mind such that they couldn't behave differently if they tried.

men (and i use to) always think that all women are looking for that "good guy". hb6-8s are. hb9-10s just coast through life, engaging in various drama to spice things up.

anyway, good luck with it all.
J