Alright, time to be completely honest with myself

Roober

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You don't understand the point.... because i don't feel like I deserve to have a quality girlfriend, I don't act in a way that is attractive

When you don't think you're worthy of a high quality woman, you try to force things to happen, you try to impress them, you come across as desperate, etc.... Basically you self sabotage yourself. This is what I do around the women I want. When I am making friends, I am very confident so I naturally act super chill and people love me

Consciously, I know I'm a very good catch but I've made dating so hard in my head subconsciously and women's standards so extreme that the lack of self belief and self trust is murdering me. This is 100% a question of confidence and personality at this point. Me not having a decent 7-9/10 GF is entirely due to a piss poor effort on my end. There are tons and tons of guys out there who aren't half as good looking as I am, a fraction as successful as me or nowhere near as good of a person as I am in terms of genuine character who have a hot girlfriend
Would a confident man come across as desperate? Would a confident man care if a woman turns him down?

What you have done is fantastic by generating wealth, exercising and being entertainment. Those are great qualities. However, that is not who you really are. You are wearing the mask of success, but it is only to protect yourself. The real person underneath the mask is the man that needs attention.

Who is dave? What is Dave's purpose?

Quit examining superficial nonsense and take deep dive at the source of your immense insecurity. Do you have resentment towards your parents? This is usually the first place to look. Is there relationship damage you still need to fix?

Whatever the source of your problem is, your ego is blocking your view. The issue with women is that they have an insane amount of intuition and ability to sniff out a mans character. And from what you have shared, once they get a whiff, they dont like the smell at all.

What is lurking beneath the surface?

Take away the money, good looks and social circle. Then what is left? If dave had absolutely nothing and was homeless on the streets, who are you?

I may suggest therapy as a source to guide your thoughts in the right direction.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Would a confident man come across as desperate? Would a confident man care if a woman turns him down?

What you have done is fantastic by generating wealth, exercising and being entertainment. Those are great qualities. However, that is not who you really are. You are wearing the mask of success, but it is only to protect yourself. The real person underneath the mask is the man that needs attention.

Who is dave? What is Dave's purpose?

Quit examining superficial nonsense and take deep dive at the source of your immense insecurity. Do you have resentment towards your parents? This is usually the first place to look. Is there relationship damage you still need to fix?

Whatever the source of your problem is, your ego is blocking your view. The issue with women is that they have an insane amount of intuition and ability to sniff out a mans character. And from what you have shared, once they get a whiff, they dont like the smell at all.

What is lurking beneath the surface?

Take away the money, good looks and social circle. Then what is left? If dave had absolutely nothing and was homeless on the streets, who are you?

I may suggest therapy as a source to guide your thoughts in the right direction.
Does Dave's core man want to have sex?

Does his core man think it's wise to spend an inordinate amount of time on "hot" women that aren't giving him sex?
 

bigdave17

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Would a confident man come across as desperate? Would a confident man care if a woman turns him down?

What you have done is fantastic by generating wealth, exercising and being entertainment. Those are great qualities. However, that is not who you really are. You are wearing the mask of success, but it is only to protect yourself. The real person underneath the mask is the man that needs attention.

Who is dave? What is Dave's purpose?

Quit examining superficial nonsense and take deep dive at the source of your immense insecurity. Do you have resentment towards your parents? This is usually the first place to look. Is there relationship damage you still need to fix?

Whatever the source of your problem is, your ego is blocking your view. The issue with women is that they have an insane amount of intuition and ability to sniff out a mans character. And from what you have shared, once they get a whiff, they dont like the smell at all.

What is lurking beneath the surface?

Take away the money, good looks and social circle. Then what is left? If dave had absolutely nothing and was homeless on the streets, who are you?

I may suggest therapy as a source to guide your thoughts in the right direction.

I agree 100%
 

mrgoodstuff

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Masculinity would be having sex . No ifs ands or buts .His evaluation system is feminine like. They say men are like dogs, I'm seeing no dog In him. Get laid from one of your more attractive options, doesn't matter if she has a baby or not. You don't have to be her husband .
 

Murk

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having sex with mediocre women does nothing to help my psyche or confidence
Wrong.

You literally invented a false sense of low self esteem to hide your enormous narcissistic belief that you deserve way more than you do and absolve yourself from swallowing your pride and risk rejection
Haha, thread done?

Guy has mental health issues for real.
 

Murk

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Murk

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But he doesn't want to fvck mediocre because he's a god. A god that can't even get that 7/10 ethnic b1tch he craves, for shame.
 

Murk

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BeExcellent

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Would a confident man come across as desperate? Would a confident man care if a woman turns him down?

What you have done is fantastic by generating wealth, exercising and being entertainment. Those are great qualities. However, that is not who you really are. You are wearing the mask of success, but it is only to protect yourself. The real person underneath the mask is the man that needs attention.

Who is dave? What is Dave's purpose?

Quit examining superficial nonsense and take deep dive at the source of your immense insecurity. Do you have resentment towards your parents? This is usually the first place to look. Is there relationship damage you still need to fix?

Whatever the source of your problem is, your ego is blocking your view. The issue with women is that they have an insane amount of intuition and ability to sniff out a mans character. And from what you have shared, once they get a whiff, they dont like the smell at all.

What is lurking beneath the surface?

Take away the money, good looks and social circle. Then what is left? If dave had absolutely nothing and was homeless on the streets, who are you?

I may suggest therapy as a source to guide your thoughts in the right direction.
Incredible post. Grand slam home run. DING DING DING!!!

Where the ego is large the self esteem is small. They are inversely proportional. Why doesn't Dave think he is good enough? (Because underneath all this bravado and peacocking behavior that's what the real Dave REALLY thinks.) Sort that out and much will fall into place.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Incredible post. Grand slam home run. DING DING DING!!!

Where the ego is large the self esteem is small. They are inversely proportional. Why doesn't Dave think he is good enough? (Because underneath all this bravado and peacocking behavior that's what the real Dave REALLY thinks.) Sort that out and much will fall into place.
As a woman you might not realize it's important for a man to have sex. Women are repulsed by sex starved men . When your having steady sex a masculine part of your image is fed. You may notice additional attention, plus it calms you down and removes neediness. I think he's an idiot from position it himself above the ladies who want to give that to him.
 

R.U.G.

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Dave, see a therapist. You can even use an app. Doctors on Demand for a board certified psychologist. Stop fvcking around on a message board and handle your sh!t.
 

bigdave17

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a lot of what you guys said is on the money


Huge part of the problem for me is I want a very specific, very high quality woman AND I want it to be a very easy approach. I don't want any obstacles, I want the woman to clearly give me signs of interest. It's just all nonsense, I have to put myself out there and put myself in uncomfortable situations
 

mrgoodstuff

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a lot of what you guys said is on the money


Huge part of the problem for me is I want a very specific, very high quality woman AND I want it to be a very easy approach. I don't want any obstacles, I want the woman to clearly give me signs of interest. It's just all nonsense, I have to put myself out there and put myself in uncomfortable situations
We were saying the "sniper" approach has been tried time and time again. It's too much work and not effective. You just need to get into the game. Also stop giving babes free attention .
 
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bigdave17

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Today I went to the gym, and this super cute Italian girl who works up front (cute, late 20s, great thick body, italian - pretty much right up my alley) definitely smiled and held eye contact with me for a little while

I went to the grocery store and this cute Spanish cashier smiled at me also and held conversation for a little while (laughed at everything I said)


the problem is none of these situations are any good for asking a woman out. I'm not gonna ask out the Italian girl right at her job when it's awkward as hell and I can't ask out the cashier when I have people waiting in line. This is what I fukking hate about dating - even when I see someone I like, very rarely is the approach situation itself any good (usually a very awkward scenario)
 

Von

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Today I went to the gym, and this super cute Italian girl who works up front (cute, late 20s, great thick body, italian - pretty much right up my alley) definitely smiled and held eye contact with me for a little while

I went to the grocery store and this cute Spanish cashier smiled at me also and held conversation for a little while (laughed at everything I said)


the problem is none of these situations are any good for asking a woman out. I'm not gonna ask out the Italian girl right at her job when it's awkward as hell and I can't ask out the cashier when I have people waiting in line. This is what I fukking hate about dating - even when I see someone I like, very rarely is the approach situation itself any good (usually a very awkward scenario)
You realize talking to them isn't dating.

Dating is going out... not talking to them while they work...

This padawan has so much to learn.

You have nothing to lose to ask for a number. All situations are good because all women live in the moment. If you don't want t ask them that's fine.

If you really wanted to go on a date.. You would ask them out.

You know BigDave, you can make has much thread as possible to convince yourself. At the end of the day, you are still making threads, and repeating that thread every day about having a girl in your life. Actions over words...
 

mrgoodstuff

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You realize talking to them isn't dating.

Dating is going out... not talking to them while they work...

This padawan has so much to learn.

You have nothing to lose to ask for a number. All situations are good because all women live in the moment. If you don't want t ask them that's fine.

If you really wanted to go on a date.. You would ask them out.

You know BigDave, you can make has much thread as possible to convince yourself. At the end of the day, you are still making threads, and repeating that thread every day about having a girl in your life. Actions over words...
Yep all the talking about it bleeds any strength you may be building .

I just did a salsa class today . It was a good move. Tons of attractive and receptive ladies.
 

MrWood

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all situations are perfect for asking her out...
take it from a guy who goes to maybe 1 or 2 clubs/bars a year.

date with cashier/sales at clothing store [x]
date with cashier at grocery store [x]
date with girl at kiosk giving samples [x]
date with girl in line at store [x]
date with meeting girl at club/bar [ ]
date with girl in random social event [x]
date with girl from penpal site, instagram, social site [x]
 
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