After 2 years of NC. BPD ex contacts me.(A MUST SEE)

[Jair213]

After 2 years of no contact. She sent me an email a few minutes ago. Just finished reading it.:crackup:

It go's as follows.

I am not sure if this is still your email address, I believe it was. Or perhaps I got it wrong.
Either way, I hope it reaches you.

This has been something ive wanted to do for some time now. But the only real reason I never did it was because I was afraid of your reaction.

Recently I went to visit Calvin in Virginia, he told me you called him when we broke up. He told me you were trying to have him convince me that I was going an unhealthy path etc..
We were talking about you, and I expressed myself to him.
He gave me that final push to finally write to you.


I want to say that I am sincerely sorry for what I put you through, I am sorry for disrespecting you and cheating on you.
I am sorry for the way I acted with you.


There are many things I see now that I did not see before, Ive grown a little bit more now. And honestly, I think about this at least once every single day. I never reached out to you after our break up, I felt I didnt care. I was going through a lot with mom, my family. I wasnt working, wasnt in school.
I was a mess, you were far away, you move to LA but at that time I was already a mess. I had already cheated, I had already messed up.
I was a complete mess, I made excuses, I used people. I did a lot of things that still bother my mind to this day.

I never handled the situation the right way, I was never fully open with you. You were always there for me, trying to understand what was going on with me.

Heart to heart, I just wanted to say I am sorry. and although we dont talk anymore , I felt the need to finally get this off my chest and express myself to you. Because you were a great person in my life that I lost. </3

I hope, I really hope you are not bothered by this.

-------------------------------


Thanks to all you guys here on sosuave this could have not being possible without you guys. Thanks braaasshhh <3

Let this be an example for all of you dude's going through the no contact process. We all gonna make it brraaaaahhhhsss.

 

[jay07]

BPD chicks are incapable of feeling guilt due to their frozen emotional level at a young age which doesnt mature to a stage they experience, they only feel shame.

That is a class A hoover attempt. If your lonely do not respond or she will get you.

 

[Jair213]

BPD chicks are incapable of feeling guilt due to their frozen emotional level at a young age which doesnt mature to a stage they experience, they only feel shame.

That is a class A hoover attempt. If your lonely do not respond or she will get you.

I agree, and well hell no I am not responding. Haha. I found this amusing at best. Her guilt is killing her, and her hamster brain is spinning in a fireball.

 

[jay07]

I agree, and well hell no I am not responding. Haha. I found this amusing at best. Her guilt is killing her, and her hamster brain is spinning in a fireball.

She doesnt feel guilty, chances are shes lonely and feels ashamed, which is difderent from guilt

If you cheat on someone you feel guiltyfor hurting someone else.

When bpd's cheat they feel ashamed (when you find out) because they know its wrong, but they do not empathize with your hurt.

 

[soulforge]

i am sure my recent ex is BPD

what are the main indicators or traits in a BPD chick?


here are some observations i made about my ex


01.she never seemed to feel remorse, after treating me like crap & at times her actions would be quite cruel

02.she hardly ever apologized about **** or took responsibility for arguments etc

03.she would always ask me.. if i loved her.. yet she she would rarely say to me "i love you"

04.if we disagreed on something, she would march off or use silent treatment

05.she would use sex, as a form of control.. teasing, then with holding sex

06.she would twist my logic, to the point where i couldn't tell if it was me who was doing wrong, or it was her

07.she loved me when things was good... but the moment i upset her or annoyed her, then all of a sudden i was a complete c@nt to her

08.she would always make herself the victim & even turn her family & friends against me

09.And finally, now that i have dumped her.. she is branch swinging to another man


does she sound like bdp or narcassist? I must point out, she is not an insecure person & does not come across as needy

she is quite hot & is quite obsessed about her looks

 

[Jair213]

She doesnt feel guilty, chances are shes lonely and feels ashamed, which is difderent from guilt

If you cheat on someone you feel guiltyfor hurting someone else.

When bpd's cheat they feel ashamed (when you find out) because they know its wrong, but they do not empathize with your hurt.

Yeah. She did some nasty sh!t.

She's never being lonely. She has a bf.

The day we broke up I found out everything because I checked her phone, and confronted her and she admitted everything. LOL

 

[jay07]

Http://gettinbetter.com/waif.html

Those are all signs minus number 3. If she doesnt rage but instead uses silent treatment than she is possibly WAIF bpd, the most damaging. Its weird she rarely says love you though, usually they attach instantly. I suggest you read this page i attached at the top

 

[jay07]

As youve probably experiwnced when you were with her, it doesnt matter if shes in a relationship. They will hoover ex bfs if they get into an arguement with their current mate.

 

[Jair213]

i am sure my recent ex is BPD

what are the main indicators or traits in a BPD chick?


here are some observations i made about my ex


01.she never seemed to feel remorse, after treating me like crap & at times her actions would be quite cruel

02.she hardly ever apologized about **** or took responsibility for arguments etc

03.she would always ask me.. if i loved her.. yet she she would rarely say to me "i love you"

04.if we disagreed on something, she would march off or use silent treatment

05.she would use sex, as a form of control.. teasing, then with holding sex

06.she would twist my logic, to the point where i couldn't tell if it was me who was doing wrong, or it was her

07.she loved me when things was good... but the moment i upset her or annoyed her, then all of a sudden i was a complete c@nt to her

08.she would always make herself the victim & even turn her family & friends against me

09.And finally, now that i have dumped her.. she is branch swinging to another man


does she sound like bdp or narcassist? I must point out, she is not an insecure person & does not come across as needy

she is quite hot & is quite obsessed about her looks

Bro you just described my ex, but this chick really suffered from low self esteem on top of that. This girls are completely crazy.

Ill add more.

1. She claimed she was touched sexually by her step father.(at the age of 12)
2. Had sex for money because her mother didn't have enough to pay bills(at the age of 17)
3. She went off with this guy that her mom was seeing because he threaten her he will hurt her mother. Took her to his apartment got her naked and just touched and told me thats all he did, and didnt fvck her.
4. Mood swings. Temper problems.
5. Cheated on her first BF with like a million dudes.LOL

 

[Jair213]

OP great post.

Soulforge,


I have EXHAUSTIVELY typed about BPD on here, as have others. Seek and ye shall find.

In the meantime, go here:

http://www.sharischreiber.com/articles.html

I've read the BPD one brah, and a couple of others. Amazing info. This has all saved my life, literally.

We are so lucky and ahead of the game knowing all this knowledge.

 

[soulforge]

Bro you just described my ex, but this chick really suffered from low self esteem on top of that. This girls are completely crazy.

Ill add more.

1. She claimed she was touched sexually by her step father.(at the age of 12)
2. Had sex for money because her mother didn't have enough to pay bills(at the age of 17)
3. She went off with this guy that her mom was seeing because he threaten her he will hurt her mother. Took her to his apartment got her naked and just touched and told me thats all he did, and didnt fvck her.
4. Mood swings. Temper problems.
5. Cheated on her first BF with like a million dudes.LOL

wow thats quite some history... she sounds bat **** crazy dude!

all tho, my ex was not an insecure person, at least she did not show insecurity... also she was quite confident

she had a big circle off friends (but nearly all her friends was single woman, who drink a lot, use cocaine, sleep around... low value woman)

 

[jay07]

If she accused all of her exs of some sort of atrocity, like violence, emotional abuse, rape, than that is a huge trait. They paint their exs black and believe the lies about them they tell people, and most likely will say the same about you.

 

[Jair213]

wow thats quite some history... she sounds bat **** crazy dude!

all tho, my ex was not an insecure person, at least she did not show insecurity... also she was quite confident

she had a big circle off friends (but nearly all her friends was single woman, who drink a lot, use cocaine, sleep around... low value woman)

she was terrible bro.

but when it came to the sex it was mind blowing brahh, she did everything and anything i wanted she was the nastiest cvm dumpster, i literally fullfilled all of my sick twisted sexual fantasy's with her. The lust was the thing that fvcked me up with this chick, i use to deepthroat and mouth fvck this chick like crazy lmfao. man ill stop there hahahahahahaahhaha. i feel sorry for the dudes that she kisses :crackup:

 

[Jair213]

If she accused all of her exs of some sort of atrocity, like violence, emotional abuse, rape, than that is a huge trait. They paint their exs black and believe the lies about them they tell people, and most likely will say the same about you.

Bro you are spot on, on this one.

The first time we broke up i found out this one dude was living already with them a week before we broke up with her and her mom and sis cuz they were renting him a room. I found out all of this a month after the break up though.

She claimed this dude hit her and forced her to have sex with him. She claimed he use to take her to Hotel's by force, make her drink and fvck her there while she struggled. She was all like yeah he rape me a couple of times. LMAO!

She even said that he use to text her in the middle of the night to go to his room and lay with him, She said she never did anything to stop him or report him to the police because she was ''scared'' Hahahhahahahahahahahaha

 

[soulforge]

she was terrible bro.

but when it came to the sex it was mind blowing brahh, she did everything and anything i wanted she was the nastiest *** dumpster, i literally fullfilled all of my sick twisted sexual fantasy's with her. The lust was the thing that fvcked me up with this chick, i use to deepthroat and mouth fvck this chick like crazy lmfao. man ill stop there hahahahahahaahhaha. i feel sorry for the dudes that she kisses :crackup:

same here jair213

the sex was amazing... she used to give me threesomes also, with some of her bisexual girlfriends

i was addicted to the sex & her hotness... she knew how to be seductive!

and she knew she was good looking & not have a problem getting men


so was we in love with woman like these... or just hooked to there hotness & the great sex

also we fear. that we will not be able to pull a hot woman like this again

 

[GS750]

she was terrible bro.

but when it came to the sex it was mind blowing brahh, she did everything and anything i wanted she was the nastiest cvm dumpster, i literally fullfilled all of my sick twisted sexual fantasy's with her. The lust was the thing that fvcked me up with this chick, i use to deepthroat and mouth fvck this chick like crazy lmfao. man ill stop there hahahahahahaahhaha. i feel sorry for the dudes that she kisses :crackup:

This is how the BPD chick hooks you and keeps you hooked. The mind blowing sex. She will turn your world upside down, but you'll keep going back for the sex.

 

[Jair213]

same here jair213

the sex was amazing... she used to give me threesomes also, with some of her bisexual girlfriends

i was addicted to the sex & her hotness... she knew how to be seductive!

and she knew she was good looking & not have a problem getting men


so was we in love with woman like these... or just hooked to there hotness & the great sex

also we fear. that we will not be able to pull a hot woman like this again

they say lust is more powerfull than love, i believe with me the lust fvcked me up bro. my ex was hot too man a solid 8, nice body too(she has a sports background)

but yeah man the lust, sex, and the fear of not getting this type girl and sex again was also my fear.. but then you realize that being with a quality woman over shadows all of that.. i wish i would have known of sosuave before meeting this chick.

 

[soulforge]

they say lust is more powerfull than love, i believe with me the lust fvcked me up bro. my ex was hot too man a solid 8, nice body too(she has a sports background)

but yeah man the lust, sex, and the fear of not getting this type girl and sex again was also my fear.. but then you realize that being with a quality woman over shadows all of that.. i wish i would have known of sosuave before meeting this chick.

that is exactly how i feel bro!

the sex is amazing & i do fear i will not be able to find a woman like that again

but... in all honestly, does she make good wife material? i would have to say no

does she make good long term partner... again i doubt that very much

maybe i need a nice girl in my life, a quality woman... but then we crave the lust & the sex, and the hot looking woman

 

[soulforge]

In my case, the sex was good.....but I've had better. Currently HAVE better.

My BPD ex was better looking than some I have dated....but the dram, mind-fvcking and constant power struggles and conflict negated all that.

WAYYYYYYY better of w/out her, no doubt.

thsi is true mauser96

the power struggles, the games leave you in f@cking turmoil... i could not even
concentrate on my work, my gym training... just totally lost grip of who i was!

i just want her toxicity out of my system asap, so i can look back & say..

I AM WAAAY BETTER OFF WITHOUT HER... NO DOUBT!

 

[dasein]

Have been with two BPDs in the past, one blessedly short, the other way too long because I didn't understand BPD then, one I get messages from just like OP's every six months or so, the other sent a FB friend request recently.

It's like a vampire standing at your door. Don't let it in!