afc and my girl!

[assassin]

im so ****ing confused...

my gf is really hot and she knows it. even though she's mine, homies are constantly trying to step up. i've got constant competition. so far i've come out on top. that is until now.

this kid, a total afc is eyeing my gf. me feeling a bit ****y went up and began talking to him. i then introduced my gf to him, not expecting much. well they talk and i took off for a bit. (stupid mistake). we'll she ends up asking for his number to keep in touch. she then tells me about it and i'm like wtf! she says shes just being friendly but i don't believe that for a second. she now calls him all the time. i've told her to stop but she just argues that he's a friend. bull****. am i just over-reacting?? i then told her if if she was lying to me i wouldn't hesitate to leave her. i've confronted her about 3 times and she's denied anything. it's starting to make me look insecure... im just confused!

 

[TonyTheTigerOI]

Wow you ****ed up big. The biggest distinction between a DJ and an AFC can be found in the FIRST IMPRESSION. You INTRODUCED him to her - allowing what LITTLE confidence he has to SHINE. And then YOU got INSECURE about it.

I dont say this often - but you screwed the pooch this time.

If I were you I would DROP IT. Focus on incresing interest from your girl. If she is spending time thinking about and chasing you she will keep the AFC at odds.

BTW - are you SURE hes an AFC? Is he better looking/older than you?

 

[assassin]

im positive this guy is an afc. he's shy around her, stumbles a lot, doesn't display any confidence and submits to her every request. it's just written all over him. i'm older and better looking. i think shes just testing me. anyways, i'll just drop it. if it continues i'm replacing her. don't care if it is right before vday.

 

[TonyTheTigerOI]

Youre really insecure abou tthis whole thing for no reason.

 

[Zaine]

She talks to him constantly on the phone...sounds like the afc is in the "friend zone." So ****ing drop it already, doesn't matter if she has another pvssy-whippeed ***** to talk to.

 

[Finch]

I think you all have it wrong. Your little AFC is doing exactly what an AFC does best.. catering to a girls needs. That's all he is doing. I doubt she would honestly be interested in this guy unless she's not too bright. She's getting the best of two worlds: A man who is strong, independent, DJ... and a caring, needy, emotional AFC. You should come out on top, but she can use this to play it against you like she is already. You've become jealous! Don't do that..

Unless you definitely feel like there is more going on.. then I wouldn't worry about it.

 

[Fitch]

Guys, it is completly understandable. He is insecure for a reason! I mean his fvcking girlfriend seems interested in another guy. Please do not tell me you will not wonder, and attempt to rationalize the impossible...

I have the key to your success, assassin. It is difficult but simple to accomplish. You need mental stanima but the process is simple. You have be CONFIDENT. Pretend this "AFC" does not exist. Be your NORMAL self and have fun. Spend some time with your girl and enjoy yourself.

Thinking about it gets you NO where. And if you demonstrate insecurity your g/f may wonder... why is 'assassin' so worried? She might even assume you have a REASON to be threatened by this "AFC." That maybe this AFC has something you do not have....

Trust your girlfriend until you have PROOF she is lying. DO NOT ASSUME.

I learned this the hard way. Do not follow my path. It isn't pretty.

Good luck. If you have further questions -- feel free to PM me and I will be glad to elaborate on some things or give you more suggestions.

P.S. I am AFC -- there is nothing wrong with it. As long as it isn't to the EXTREME. I also learned that the hard way. I am 1/4 DJ -- 3/4 AFC. (the DJ MUST GROW)

 

[TyTe`EyEs]

You shouldn't worry about it. If I were you, I would give her a taste of the same. If she can do that sh1t then uhh...

 

[Climax]

Care to SHARE?!?

Originally posted by Fitch
I learned this the hard way. Do not follow my path. It isn't pretty.

Care to elaborate? What did you do? what happened? what was the situation? I'm interested as i'm sure others are.. so please... DO tell


Laterz...

 

[Climax]

My 2c...

Originally posted by TyTe`EyEs
You shouldn't worry about it. If I were you, I would give her a taste of the same. If she can do that sh1t then uhh...

NO!

This will just make it out as if you are doing it to spite her, and will create MORE problems... be the mature one, and just act like you are not bothered by this other AFC... if you change your behaviour etc because of this AFC, then hee wins, and she will SEE that you are getting insecure and then also trying to control her by saying " if you do it, then so will i" etc... so DONT do that... its immature and shows insecurity.

I have been in the excat situation as asassin, and i almost lost my girl becuse of my obsessive behaviour... but i caught on to what i was doing wrong, and i quicly changed myself to being the Don Juan that i am now... I actually encourage her to speak and phone other guys... this is a very good way to show her that you are confident in yourself, u are NOT insecure, and that you are not posessive/controlling etc...

By reacting and asking questions etc about this other afc guy then you might also give ur girl the message that you do not trust her BECAUSE of the fact that you are getting all isecure and asking questions and interigating her/him etc... so just play cool, and act confident, no matter what the situation is... she IS afterall WITH YOU because she wants to be. Now like it was mentioned earliyer in this thread, work on YOU and HER, and make sure that she enjoys YOUR company more than she enjoys his


Laterz...

 

[TyTe`EyEs]

Re: My 2c...

Originally posted by ~ªêQµïTª$~
NO!

This will just make it out as if you are doing it to spite her, and will create MORE problems... be the mature one, and just act like you are not bothered by this other AFC... if you change your behaviour etc because of this AFC, then hee wins, and she will SEE that you are getting insecure and then also trying to control her by saying " if you do it, then so will i" etc... so DONT do that... its immature and shows insecurity.

How would talking to other females show insecurity? If anything, it would show that he is valued not only by her, but other females as well.

 

[Climax]

Missunderstanding...

Originally posted by TyTe`EyEs
How would talking to other females show insecurity? If anything, it would show that he is valued not only by her, but other females as well.

I was speaking about flirting with other girls... not just talking to them... if thats what you meant, then you are perfectly right, there is nothing wrong with just talking to other women.


Laterz...

 

[TyTe`EyEs]

I meant that he should befriend a girl as she has an AFC. I wonder how she would feel if he talked on the phone with a HB every day. You see what I'm getting at here?

 

[assassin]

i've got it under contol now. i just let it go and went on with life. the afc will never be able to live up to me. im almost positive she was just trying to get back at me for hanging out with other chicks. i wasn't aware that this was an issue to her until she mentioned it the other day. anyways thank you to everyone who shared their advice. take it easy.

 

[Climax]

ok... but...

Originally posted by TyTe`EyEs
I meant that he should befriend a girl as she has an AFC. I wonder how she would feel if he talked on the phone with a HB every day. You see what I'm getting at here?

yeah.... i know EXACTLY what u are saying... that he must show him what SHE is doing to HIM with this AFC, so she must FEEL the SAME thing that HE is feeling.... but the thing is, is that if he does that, she might think that he is doing it to spite her, and then that could cause problems.... i speak from experiance on this one ... I yeah.. i do agree that he should do something like that, but he must be very carefull not to OVER do it


Laterz...