About LJBF and the Friends zone

[LionOne]

You invest into girl when you build rapport with her. This takes time. With the good rapport you can for example ask the girl to do some small favour for you. So, rapport has some VALUE in it.

If you next the girl who you have rapport with, you also lose this value associated with the rapport.

Girls don't like to lose value. This is the reason they use LJBF-line. LJBF, "Let's Just Be Friends", essentially means that she's not interested in having anything intimate with the guy but she wants to keep the rapport alive between him and herself.

Of course she will judge if the guy is worth keeping around. She won't do this consciously but it's automatic. Girls are so wired to sense the value that they don't have to think these things. Guy might have some social value, like being an access key to some parties, he could be funny and entertaining, he could buy dinner from time to time or he could do some favours. Simply put, girls think: Being friends with him = having access to his value.

If girl says to you "let's just be friends" she puts you in the friends zone. You know that you have failed to create/keep the attraction with her. So, your options are: stay in the friends zone or forget about her.

If you stay in the friends zone you should know that she could try to benefit from your friendship. In the friend zone it's usually not worth to try to regain the attraction. Start new, there are enough girls out there. However, in the friends zone you have the luxury to game her FRIENDS. This is her value to you. If there's no possibility that she will go out with you and her friends then think hard what's the value of this friendship.

What kind of value you guys like to obtain from the girls that you are just friends with?

 

[Sandow]

Most of my friends that are girls are friends with benefits. There are very few that I dont hook up with, and thats because they've been childhood friends or in-laws. That being said, my friends that have I've known for a long time have always hooked me up with their friends. There's definitely value in that. Otherwise, if she had no friends, I probably wouldn't talk to her too much, maybe just a phone call every once in awhile to show some consideration.

 

[WesCottII]

I disagree with your perception of why girls "ljbf" guys. IMO, they do it because you've conyeved the same amount of sexuality as a cactus. They offer the olive branch of "LJBF" because, quite frankly, it's less harsh. They'd love to still have your attention, but their legs are closed to you (I believe the friendship zone IS escapable, but takes time)

Personally, if I fall into the "friendship zone", I've wanted the girl. Not to listen to who she's shagging, or who she fancies, but to be rattling the headboard with her myself.

For that reason, I can never be friends with a girl I've been attracted to, but have been LJBF'd. I don't want a friendship, I want sex. That might sound harsh, but I'm simply not willing to compromise.

I can be friends with girls I've never had any attraction to, but a girl that I have, there is no way I'm being friends with her.

 

[Lord Shinra]

I got LJBF'd by this one girl. She tried to turn me into some kind of tampon for her own benefit, and to use me as some social proof to pick up some butt ugly guys.

Anyway, I didn't next her, but she's run out of value to me because she wont come out to be my social proof.

So I'm thinking about nexting her soon.