I'd say be careful. Guard your heart. Some of the things I have seen her do are ruthless. Some of the lives and hearts she has left in her wake will never recover. Don't invest too much and take every word she says with a grain of salt. Understand that the way it is now may change in an instant. Don't screw it up if you can. But screwing up is almost inevitable because she will frame it that way. Be patient. Don't ever say anything mean or insult her. If red flags and conflicts arise, get out while you still can. Don't create any drama. Don't project a future with her, believe in the words she says or hope for any lasting, meaningful relationship to withstand the test of time. She has no affiliation or connection to anyone when all is said and done. If you don't suit her, then be ready to be discarded. Do anything in your power not to fall in love with her unless you are certain she feels the same way and you are certain you want that as well. If you do fall in love with her, don't let her know she has you. Once she has you, she will slowly pull away and will not want you anymore. Never let your guard down. Always be on top of your game.
Understand that she may lie, she may manipulate, she may confuse, she may do a lot of very frustrating and difficult things to deal with. But let them go, because confronting her will only push her further away. She will spin every conflict to be your fault. Demanding respect, appreciation or importance will only backfire. If she doesn't already treat you that way, its probably too late. You can try to earn it but the only way she will treat you with respect, appreciation or importance is if she wants to. Lashing out at her, losing your cool and insulting her will be guaranteed to fail. Respectfully confronting her about an issue you have will fail as well. You are not permitted to have any issues because if you do, she will find the next willing participant who doesn't. Once you make one mistake, no matter what you do, it will never be truly forgiven. Learn to never need anything from her.
Try to listen to her even if she is inconsistent and confusing. Learn to not need or expect any honest communication, but just accept her for how she is. If you are going to withstand the emotions she will put you through, you have to be able to let her do anything she wants to you without reacting to it. It's a struggle. It is definitely worth the try if you are strong enough to maintain your composure and your own life. But be ready to fail. Most of all, learn that the way she is will never change and unless you benefit from the way she treats you, then you are better off to just let her go before emotions flare up. Resentment is impossible to ignore. So if she treats you well, and you believe she loves you and you believe she is treating you like a decent human being, then you are lucky.
So if you need to feel loved, important, appreciated and valued, then be on close watch for red flags as early as possible and get out before your heart is shattered. Because she will put you through some of the most uncomfortable, miserable and heartbreaking moments that you thought were not even possible. But all in all, if you are going to get involved, good luck to you. I wish you success where all of us have failed. But like I said, a good many of us are in the same boat and we wish you the best. But we hope you heed our warning and protect your heart from the same fate we all suffered. Because in the end, the best line of defense is to be ready for a miserable experience. It is a distinct and likely possibility that you will end up sitting right here next to me with nothing to show for it wishing you hadn't even gotten involved in the first place.
But most of all, ask yourself, do you even want this? :nono:
What if there was another way? :rockon:
Understand that she may lie, she may manipulate, she may confuse, she may do a lot of very frustrating and difficult things to deal with. But let them go, because confronting her will only push her further away. She will spin every conflict to be your fault. Demanding respect, appreciation or importance will only backfire. If she doesn't already treat you that way, its probably too late. You can try to earn it but the only way she will treat you with respect, appreciation or importance is if she wants to. Lashing out at her, losing your cool and insulting her will be guaranteed to fail. Respectfully confronting her about an issue you have will fail as well. You are not permitted to have any issues because if you do, she will find the next willing participant who doesn't. Once you make one mistake, no matter what you do, it will never be truly forgiven. Learn to never need anything from her.
Try to listen to her even if she is inconsistent and confusing. Learn to not need or expect any honest communication, but just accept her for how she is. If you are going to withstand the emotions she will put you through, you have to be able to let her do anything she wants to you without reacting to it. It's a struggle. It is definitely worth the try if you are strong enough to maintain your composure and your own life. But be ready to fail. Most of all, learn that the way she is will never change and unless you benefit from the way she treats you, then you are better off to just let her go before emotions flare up. Resentment is impossible to ignore. So if she treats you well, and you believe she loves you and you believe she is treating you like a decent human being, then you are lucky.
So if you need to feel loved, important, appreciated and valued, then be on close watch for red flags as early as possible and get out before your heart is shattered. Because she will put you through some of the most uncomfortable, miserable and heartbreaking moments that you thought were not even possible. But all in all, if you are going to get involved, good luck to you. I wish you success where all of us have failed. But like I said, a good many of us are in the same boat and we wish you the best. But we hope you heed our warning and protect your heart from the same fate we all suffered. Because in the end, the best line of defense is to be ready for a miserable experience. It is a distinct and likely possibility that you will end up sitting right here next to me with nothing to show for it wishing you hadn't even gotten involved in the first place.
But most of all, ask yourself, do you even want this? :nono:
What if there was another way? :rockon: